smallstar Posted June 11, 2009 Report Share Posted June 11, 2009 Why is it, that even though I know that the pills no longer make me high or happy, I still feel the need to take them? It is nothing like it used to be, therefore it should be easier to just stop, sometimes I can't even tell I took anything, yet it's all I think about, right at this moment, I want to take one, the only reason I haven't yet is because I'm typing this. I know that when I take it, it will hardly be noticeable, yet I can't talk myself out of taking it. It makes no sense. I know that I need one in the morning, but I know from experience, that if I can try so hard to put mind over matter, and try so hard not to let my mood plummet, I can last a long while with not taking another one, like 4 to 5 hours rather than my 2 hour standard. I know that if I can get in the right frame of mind I can do much much better, and maybe wean myself off completely, eventually one day. How do I get to that frame of mind? John Rutledge 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finding my way Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Step by step, smallstar. You are doing the very hard work of rerouting your brain. There is a deep groove there, formed by the addiction, and it must be so hard to take a different path:(. The brain is maleable, though, and this CAN happen for you. Keep your expectations at small gains, step by step, every day, and they will lead to big improvements. Think of the person recovering from an accident, having to regain function in their body. They have to get up every day and work their limbs even though it hurts so much and even though it seems like nothing is improving. That is how we have to do it when we are affecting major changes in our neurology. Repairing nerve damage is slow work, but very possible!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyannee Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 I know exactly how you feel...after awhile, you get nothing from them...except for me the ability to not be sick. Recently, I was in the hospital (6 days this time) I have managed to stay off the pills for almost 20 days.....I want one as I type this....they do numb my pain and they also give me energy to function. with all this new medication they have put me on I need all the energy I can get....hang in there I know exactly the trap they get you into....I sometimes wish they prescribed pain pills for depression...HA like that will ever happen...I can HONESTLY say I believe they would help me function like a normal person...not to get high or anything. just to help me make it through the day... John Rutledge 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smallstar Posted June 12, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Nancy, if you haven' t had any in 20 days please don't have one today! That is great to hear. I know how much they help, but they are so not worth it in the long run, believe me. Now instead of helping with depression, they just add to it. I know it's hard when you know how much better you will feel instantly, it's hard to turn down that kind of relief. But really try, you are doing such good things for yourself right now, just keep trying and don't let the idea get stuck in your head. Because I know once that happens, that's it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smallstar Posted June 14, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 Finding, are you saying that the addiction, the constant thought and need to take more is similiar to trying to correct other thoughts, such as you would fix using cbt? Like, if I tried hard enough, I could concentrate on rerouting my brain into not constantly thinking about the pills and then having to have it? I was just thinking today, I just want to be able to go through the day without constantly worrying about it. Everything is based on that. Always watching the clock and counting what's left, no matter what I'm doing. Why can't I just go through my day, and even if I'm going to take pills, take them when I need it, not constantly worry about it. Just have it when my body tells me, not my mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finding my way Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 Hi smallstar:). I'm not an expert of course, but from what I've learned, when we are troubled, we can get stuck looping round and round in the limbic part of the brain, the midbrain, sort of like an animal caught in a trap circling round and round. So being stuck in the miserable cycle of anxiety, all you can think of is "how do I get out, how do I get out?" To really solve that problem for good, you need to be in a different part of your brain, the cortex, but you don't know how to get there so you can only come up with impulses or thoughts of what you've done before like taking a pill. That's what it is like to be stuck in anxiety mode. You really can't think from that place, and since you're stuck, it feels like this is all there is and all there ever will be to your life. It's horrible!!Truth: there is much more to us than this, much more. Challenge: how do we get there? How do we get out of being stuck in looping anxiety?The way out is to forge new pathways in your brain. Each person is different in what works the best for them. I'm very arty and tend to use imagery to think. That is coming from the right side of the brain, and it's what I use to pull out of anxiety. That's one avenue to let the animal out of the trap, start expressing how you feel with images...keep fishing until you get the right one....search google images for help. More right brain modes are listening to music, drawing, painting, acting, singing, dancing, all that arty stuff. The act of expressing this way gets things moving; I'm not stuck in a loop, I'm out and living again, making new connections, finding new paths to try. Sometimes finding solutions.There are so many other ways that can work. Standing on one leg, for example. I'm serious! If you challenge your balance and coordinate your body to meet that challenge, bingo, you are in other parts of your brain besides the stuck place. Keep going with coordinated movements, and you will get more and more unstuck. Other body modes are to work with your breathing, do yoga, or pilates, etc.Let's say you are a Left brained type. Start writing out mathematical equations. Play word games. Sudoku, cross word puzzles, Boggle. I'm sure there are many more.The crafty types knit, do cross stitch, do woodworking, etc,etc.These are all modes to get you out of the stuck place and get you moving again. It may seem like it is just dorky stuff, but it is very beneficial! It's all about getting out of the trap inside your head.Once out, then things like CBT, or other types of therapy, heck, other types of living, will seem much more possible for you. You will be able to think! No one can think well when they are caught in anxiety. John Rutledge 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roamer2 Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 when the substance stops working as our copeing skills and fun it is usually a very good sign that we are ready to shed the old life for a much more fulfilling 1... seek positive tools like this site good support mental help and an anonymous program... and let me say welcome to the first day of the rest of your life John Rutledge 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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