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Questions about Paranoid Personality Disorder


mayso123
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Hello everyone!

I am here not so much for me but for my mother. Ive lived through a lot with her, many years of frustration, sadness and loneliness and although I always felt in my heart that she is sick, i could never pin point it. Keeping a veeeeeeery long story short...today, the word paranoia popped in my head and I googled it. Paranoid Personality Disorder came up and ALL the symptoms match but all the websites I have looked at say that it is very difficult to treat these patients because they will suspect the therapist. There really isnt much information on the disorder besides the basic description so I was hoping that through this forum I could find someone that can help me.

My questions are: what do I do? do I talk to her about it? do we just deal with it?...I know for a fact that if I mention it to her she will feel attacked no matter how I say it but I dont know really know whats appropriate for me to do.

Any information or advice will be great!

Thank you

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Hi mayso123, welcome to our community! :) Most of us are not experts here, so we can't diagnose, but we do offer support to fellow sufferers. Unfortunately, your mother may need to get help but she needs to want to get help, which puts you in a somewhat powerless position if what you need most is for her to change. What we can do though, is support you. You have had a difficult life dealing with this. Have you considered going to see a therapist yourself, to help you? Many here can relate to being in difficult circumstances with family members :)

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Thank you for your reply finding my way!

Support is something I definitely need because I don't really have who to talk to. I havent told my husband because I dont know how he would feel about her or if he would tell his mom (theyre really close) and it get back to her somehow and she will never speak to me again shell think im disloyal or going against her. I was hoping I could find someone here that has lived with the disorder or with someone that has it to get a little more insight on the issue because there is a lack of info...im crossing my fingers :). I have thought of seeing someone for myself because sometimes I feel that many things have affected me more than I thought and im afraid that Im more like her than I think. Im not sure how to go about it...how to find one, pay..etc. Does health insurance cover it?

Again, thank you for your reply :)

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Mayso and Finding,

Finding, that was a great way to respond to Mayso, right on target.:D

Mayso, the best you can do is to find support for yourself in dealing with your mother. I have worked with paranoid personality disorder in psychotherapy but Finding is right: they have to want to get help. Once they start therapy, the work is difficult and delicate because they are paranoid and suspicious. However, it can be done but it takes a long time and lots of patience.

Here, we can give you all the support and encouragement you need. In fact, I would even suggest to you that, in addition to staying here with us, you seek psychotherapy for yourself. Also, I really hope that you live separately from your mother. Living with her is unhealthy for you, trust me, I have a lot of experience from my private practice over the years.

Please stay with us and keep posting.

Allan:)

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I havent lived with her for about 5 years now but we do speak over the phone almost every day since Im the only person she really has. I agree with you about it being unhealthy to live with her. Its hard enough speaking to her so often as it drains me and requires me to have alot of patience.

I am looking into going to therapy for myself. Hopefully I will be able to accept the things that my mother has done before and Ill be able to handle things with her with more patience. Maybe I will stop resenting her. We shall see what happens!

In your experience, at what point do patients with paranoid personality disorder seek help? do they have to hit a low to realize something is wrong or did they go to you for other reasons and you diagnosed them with the disorder?

Thanks Allan!

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