ageplay??

[Blossom]

Hi everyone,

I'm not sure if this is even in the right section for this but I have a quick question to ask - Has anyone here ever heard of this Guardian Island ageplay game thingy? I came across it on the net this morning and I'm unsure of whether to become a member or not and I dunno whether it's even safe because I don't know much about it? Apparently it's supposed to be a form of therapy because it allows you to be a child again - you can be reparented and live out your childhood as you want to. So, if anyone here knows anything about this it'd be cool if ye could tell me more about it! :confused:

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi ageplay,

I know nothing about it but I have a strong reaction: Beware, a lot of these things are not harmless.

Allan

[malign]

Mmm, I've heard of people role-playing that they are a different age than their actual age, though I've never done it. I imagine that it could conceivably be helpful if you find yourself in a game "family" that is caring, just as it would be nice to have been in one at birth. But where you can't choose your birth family, if you don't like the one you get in the game, I would assume that you could switch. The trick would be in having the presence of mind to do that, instead of allowing yourself to be misused. Not everyone would be able to do this easily, and perhaps those who had a hard time in their "first" childhood would find it even more difficult. Add to that the fact that games like this might have a tendency to attract an even higher percentage of weirdos than real parenthood does, and it sounds to me like something to approach with caution, at best.

[kaudio]

I have not heard of Guardian Island, but like malign and Allan, I am aware of such role playing activities. If one participated in role playing games (RPG) for amusement or entertainment, sure it's a great way to have fun. There are all sorts of role playing games out there. Even the graphical video games have a potential role play element to them, but this element is generally subsumed by gameplay features.

However, in the case of role-playing for the purposes of reliving childhood, this seems to be a very personal matter that may leave participants vulnerable and to the mercies of the 'Dungeon Master' - for lack of a better term. Usually an RPG will give players an opportunity to create a character, and then thrust them into a world where they can flesh out the personality, habits, likes and dislikes, etc. But, the character is ultimately the result of the player's creative capacity, permitting her to explore what life may be like as a hero, villain, whatever. In a Guardian Island type game, rather than creating a unique character, one is playing as oneself. The information that players offer by playing, intimate knowledge of one's life, personality, habits, likes and dislikes, is made readily available to all involved. Besides the clear problem of trust, broadly speaking, parents can be considered Dungeon Masters of sorts. If one wishes to relive childhood with another set of Dungeon Masters, how many more Masters can one tolerate?

Further, a game is played based on how well it meets the demands of the players. No doubt the players of such childhood replay RPGs have specific desires they wish to satisfy, but life is not 'on demand' like that. There are people who like to push the buttons of others, there are those who internalize things, and there will be anger, frustration, boredom, and alienation in any relationship. People learn how to cope with these 'pains' in turn or at once. Will the administrators or 'Dungeon Masters' of such RPGs have the interests of the player in mind, or of their own business?

[Blossom]

Hmmmm, ok thanks everyone - it sounds a little dodgy so I think I'll just stay away from it!!!

[Donna]

i know this is an old thread but id like to put my opinion in if thats ok?

i was in an ageplay r/ship for 6yrs it originally started as D/s which is a little like a gaurdian/child role anyway,but for the last 2 yrs because of the way i am and my ex partners personality it naturally developed into ageplay.

These sites are not damaging although id stay away from the porn ones if that kind of thing doesnt interest you.

id like to get rid of one myth.

they are all adults 18+ they are only sexually attracted to adults, if they were interested in real kids the last thing they would find attractive would be a woman/man looking and acting like a child

all related genuine BDSM communities are extremely against anything involving minors and generally more actively involved in taking a stand against any such crimes, because many people automatically assume sado masochism is violent and roleplaying sick/twisted so they do everything they can to get rid of the stigma attached to it.

the only reason it's called ageplay is because like anything it needs a name.

it generally comes under the umbrella of bdsm because the little one is usually submissive to a degree or if there's any discipline involved and how on earth do you go about meeting people with the same interests as yourself in the 'straight' world, just get chatting in a bar and say would you like to be my daddy/mummy little girl etc..imagine how that would go down lol

Generally the Adults ..both male and female..are family of some type

Dungeon Masters is used in S&M play, and there is typically only one parent/guardian the rest are usually friends or Aunties/Uncles etc.

it is very beneficial to the ''little ones'' (age 18+) because the majority and many are men have had no real childhood or have been abused and are usually very vulnerable to begin with but in the role of little one they are treated as such and they get to relive or re-invent a childhood.and are looked after and protected.

that is the main rule of any such site and offline a lot of communication is done and getting to know each other before the r/ship becomes ageplay orientated the grown up for both the little ones safety and their own need full trust and confident with each other and everyone in that community knows that if one of the partys particularly the 'grown up' doesnt follow that then you stay well clear and online any such person not adhering to that is banned from the sites.

This kind of roleplaying does not always include sexual activities only some go to that level though most do include dscipline like in 'real' parent/child r/ships..

It's all done in a very caring way there is often play bits where the ''little one'' will act up and be 'spanked' but it's in a fun way and there is always whats known as aftercare.

i understand this may seem difficult to people to not find it repulsive or sick but i cant state strongly enough that it is nothing like it's portrayed in the media.

For those who ageplay it is not actually role playing as such, the 'little ones' tend to (this is difficult to explain lol) slip into that kind of headspace/mindset without even conciously intending to, have you ever wished you were a kid again? wanted to feel safe, warm,be yourself no 'gron up' social expectations, maybe run in the park, have a bedtime story read all snuggled up cosy, even have a tantrum stamp your feet when you're frustrated or that kind of thing.

every adult ive ever known has said they had but those who ageplay feel it more strongly and they dont just feel it they become it just sort of happens.

they're not retards who are permenantly that way they are first and foremost adults but it is a large part of who they are and it will come out at times regardless.

Quite a few therapists now encourage and help abused patients to bring out their IK (inner kid) in order to relive or re-invent their childhood well that is what ageplay is, why do they suggest it if it can be damaging or dangerous?

when it's a part of a loving r/ship these IKs have someone caring to support them encourage them and share with them and even if it's online it can be in a caring community just as people here care and support each other.

there is always a safeword involved and that doesnt just mean for any sexual activity it is always respected and responded to immediately and the minute it's used all roles are stopped.

i said more than i actually meant to sorry and got a bit carried away, it's something ive experienced and know of and i think it can be helpful to see different opinions and outlooks on controversial things.

i do have a cpl of questions!

for anyone who doesnt think it's natural or more common than it appears that it's just a few weirdos perhaps to be cautious of,

think about the nickname chosen.. Blossom..(this is not meant to be patronising Blossom) Blossom is a very pretty even little girly sounding name to use whilst there are quite a few grown ups and older girls use such names a lot more scorn such 'girly babyish' names.I had a princess nickname for a longtime and was often told it was childish.

btw ageplay sites are very hard to find you usually have to search specifically for them, Gaurdian Island is one of the major ones though,

for anyone (not just Blossom) with a cute name to come across them,ask about them and show an interest in possibly joining one, does that maybe say something even if it is subconciously?

[Blossom]

hi donna, i don't really know what to say.. i didn't mean to offend anyone by writing this thread. i was just curious about what exactly ageplay was and when i found out, decided it wasn't for me. i have nothing against anyone who takes part in any of these sites. if it helps people, that's great!

and i'm sorry if my name bothers anyone.

[Donna]

Hi

im really sorry if i came across wrong Blossom, im not very good at wording things right and i wasnt offended, i hope i havnt offended anyone! it's hard trying to explain that kind of thing.

i think im maybe a bit defensive but it's often a very controversial issue and people who have this kind of lifestyle can feel very much alone, 'different' and scared of being open just like we can.

i just thought maybe putting across a different perspective might give some understanding of it rather than the typical negative publicity and to say that it can and does help people.

Again im really sorry if ive offended you.

btw, i think your name is really cute i love pretty girly names...ive had loads of them! sparkling pixie and little one being just 2 of them lol

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Donna, Blossom and all,

Donna, I read your post and I do not believe that you were offensive to anyone, at least, speaking for myself, I do not think so.

Having said this I want to repeat my caution. Donna, I realize that you tried to be very reassuring in writing your post about age/play and you seem even enthusiastic. Clearly, you do not believe there is any danger of exploitation or anything of that kind.

With all due respect to you and your opinions, I have to express the fact that I have my doubts.

Those who were abused as children and who want to engage in BDSM have made a connection between pain and pleasure as a result of having been abused. In other words, they have formed an association between pain and love. "The more pain you give me, the more you love me." This is something like it goes.

In my professional opinion, and you do not have to agree with me, rather than reliving or repeating the abuse through role play, they need to learn a new way of relating, a healthier way of relating in which there can be real trust and love between two people without being submissive or sadistic. To my mind, this "age/play merely repeats the abuse. Yes, there are therapists who do what you say about role playing the abuse, but, that does not mean they are right or that they should do it.

I hope my post does not sound "scolding" because I do not mean it to be, not at all.

Donna and everyone, what are your opinions and lets discuss this in ways that are sensitive and understanding. Also, please, please, tell me if I came across harsh.

Allan

[Donna]

hi,

i might have come across wrong sorry

Ageplay doesnt involve sado masochism, by discipline i meant as you discipline a child and not many use it as roleplay in the bedroom and certainly never ever role playing or re-living past abuse.

It only comes under the umbrella of BDSM because it's different to the 'norm'.

I agree that for some people masochism is linked to their past, many masochists have had an abusive background and i can understand the more you hurt me the more you love me theory and im sure it does happen and in those cases there must be as you say a better way of doing things.

But there is also the chemical explanation for the pain/pleasure for any masochist regardless of their past,as well so it cant be all bad

Unfortunately r/ships like these are often misunderstood, when titles such as Dominants,sadists,masochists,submissives are bandied around many people assume a sadist = an unloving violent partner and a submissive = abused doormat and it's really not true and much of it is games and roleplay, and the sadist is only a sadist in the bedroom.

The only person who has never bullied,hurt or abused me in any of my r/ships is my ex-partner who was a sadist (in the bedroom) and then later my 'daddy' and i never had any bad experiences with my real dad in case you're wondering. And while im not a loving or romantic person it was the happiest r/ship i ever had and he treated me with a lot of respect and stood by me when everyone else walked away.

The type of r/ship i had with him actually helped me in a lot of ways, i rarely show my emotions when i have any but when i was 'little' i could sit on his knee cry and talk about things and explain my problems in a way that ive never ever been able to either before or after, did it take any of my problems away? no but at least there were times i had an outlet for them...and that says an awful lot,i never do the 'talking' thing i never let people see me cry instead i s/h, so surely sitting on someones knee having your hairstroked,and soothed as a child might be soothed is much safer and more theraputic than hurting myself.

If i were to have another r/ship at all thats the kind i would want again,i felt much safer,more confident and with time that bit more able to trust.

ive tried to word things carefully and put the trigger sign just in case, i hope ive not being insensitive in anyway.

[Blossom]

hey donna, i'm sorry, i was just having a bad day and was waaaaaaay oversensitive!!!! it's cool that ageplay helped you:cool:

you havn't offended me atall.

and i like your girly names too:)

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Everyone,

I have a question for all of us:

Why do we all seem so worried that we are being offensive to anyone? I have not read one offensive thing and yet we are all apologizing!!! How come???

Allan

[Blossom]

hmmmmm....good question:D i dunno, i suppose the reason i apologized was because sometimes i get a little paranoid that people take me up the wrong way, and i just wanted to make sure that donna didn't think i was against ageplay, because i'm not.

Can i apologize for apologizing....?!!

[Donna]

Lol me too

im always worried of saying the wrong thing or offending anyone..then feeling bad that i would think i am worth anything that people could be offended by me!..errrm it gets kind of confusing

[malign]

I'm sorry you all feel you have to keep apologizing. :-P

[Blossom]

maybe this should be called the "sorry thread" instead!!!!

[malign]

I'm sorry, it's too late to change the name. :-P

[Blossom]

i'm SORRY i suggested changing the name!!!!!!