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i know that this site is mainly for supporting people with ED's but i dont know where else to go to. my GF of 3 years has anorexia and im not really sure what i should or shouldn't be doing. she is trying to get help and is in a clinic to do so but i dont know what is going on and want to help if i can. if you could give me any advice so that i could understand ED's a little better it would be very appreciated.

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Hi rmillberr-

You can start by reading our article on Eating Disorders- click here for a link. That should give you more information about what's going on. In terms of what you should do-be as supportive as you can.

You can show your support by reminding her that you want to help, letting her talk about her feelings if she wants to, and repeating that you care very much about her. Another good idea is to explain to her that you want to help, but that you don't know exactly what to do to be helpful. She may not be able to provide detailed answers, but this type of question can be very reassuring to someone who is hurting.

Do not pressure her to talk about what is going on while she is in the clinic, and do not repeatedly ask her questions about what she is eating or what she weighs. Also, understand that she may not be able to focus much on you or your relationship together right now. Particularly if she is in a clinic-she will likely be spending tons of time going to groups, individual therapy, and doing the hard work of trying to get better. She may simply be exhausted and emotionally "wrung out" when she has free time.

Hang it there, eating disorders are complex, and it can be very hard to see someone you care about in so much pain.

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