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Just Be UpFront


Guest GingerSnap
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Guest GingerSnap

OK, you'll have to forgive me because I have been pouring over all the information on the internet since an incident with my husband in April 2009. I wanted to say that when I see someone thinking that maybe they can hide a problem or that it will get better once they are married, I just scream! That never works. Please for everyone's sake, be honest. After 27 years of begging my husband to seek help and constantly seeking resources for him that he mostly blew off, he went over The Line with it. I asked him a couple nights ago, "Why am I leaving you?" And he didn't mention how he had treated me or the over The Line issue but said sincerely "Because I refused to get help." The longer you wait to get help, the harder it gets and the problems grow with time. So this is just me asking you to be honest for the good of everyone involved.

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Hi Gingersnap

OK, you'll have to forgive me because I have been pouring over all the information on the internet since an incident with my husband in April 2009. I wanted to say that when I see someone thinking that maybe they can hide a problem or that it will get better once they are married, I just scream! That never works. Please for everyone's sake, be honest. After 27 years of begging my husband to seek help and constantly seeking resources for him that he mostly blew off, he went over The Line with it. I asked him a couple nights ago, "Why am I leaving you?" And he didn't mention how he had treated me or the over The Line issue but said sincerely "Because I refused to get help." The longer you wait to get help, the harder it gets and the problems grow with time. So this is just me asking you to be honest for the good of everyone involved.

Forgive me for saying this but... what are you asking apart from telling us that your husband has overstepped the mark?

If it is possible, could you please give us a bit more information at what your husband has supposedly done?

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Guest GingerSnap

Not that it matters specifically what kinds of information one is not honest about, lies about, or just leaves out, but: http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2128 - And it is not about what he has "supposedly done". I used to wonder what "irretrievably broken" met and now I know for sure but I just wish that it wasn't my husband that taught me this. Trust is essential for a good relationship. It is a must have.

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Hi GingerSnap

Sorry, I have not been on the community for a while so, didn't read your previous post, connected to this.

Trust is essential for a good relationship. It is a must have.

I agree with you, if there is no trust then what's the use in carrying on? Only you know the answer to that, especially the relationship that your in.

I hope things work out for you.

Take care.

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Guest GingerSnap

paula: That's OK and thank you for your concern I do appreciate it. I have not posted much until just lately. This is a great place to learn and with some very good people of which, it appears you are one. My best, GingerSnap

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Paula, Ginger, and everyone,

I agree. Relationships, the healthy ones, are based on honesty. There are two kinds of lies: Lies of commission as in telling a lie and lies of omission, as in leaving something important out. They are both lies and eat at trust and, eventually destroy relationships and even destroy families.

Allan

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