TerrifiedUser Posted December 28, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 28, 2009 (edited) g Edited July 11, 2013 by TerrifiedUser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted December 28, 2009 Report Share Posted December 28, 2009 What do you think about talking about these "buried feelings" about the past incident? What exactly happened, and how did it make you feel?From what I understood, you were goofing around and someone overreacted. Would that make you feel so worried that you often reply to your own thread multiple times before anyone else does, or could it be that you have an underlying tendency to worry? If it's specifically this event that caused it, you would address that. If you have a general tendency to worry too much, they can help you with that, too, but the treatments are different. Either way, I feel like discussing the "tests" and so on (current events) is not helping you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted December 29, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 29, 2009 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catsirish Posted December 30, 2009 Report Share Posted December 30, 2009 whats normal about you is you dont like youre thoughts about little girls. its the no conscience of the peds that make them real dangerous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted December 30, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 30, 2009 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted December 30, 2009 Report Share Posted December 30, 2009 (edited) deleted..... Edited February 9, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted December 30, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 30, 2009 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted December 31, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 (edited) deleted..... Edited February 9, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted December 31, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 (edited) g Edited July 11, 2013 by TerrifiedUser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 (edited) deleted..... Edited February 9, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 Terrified,Good morning! I return to your thread every few days and find that your comments and concerns continue to cycle and cycle, only different words are used to express the same feelings and fears. I also notice that the recommendations from several days ago for how to begin resolving this have not been taken up, as such, you continue to be stuck in the real issue -- an obsessional worrying that has you chasing your tail. I fear that coming here for support and to further discuss your concerns may be serving as a strategy for not doing the real work of breaking thru this pattern--- is it possible that you use the forum to not have to confront your issues and do something about them?? I think what Julian and Malign, myself and others have been saying is what almost all of us have been repeating all along. And while i believe you've heard us clearly, I'm more and more convinced that the forum is an escape or diversion from doing the real work of desensitization suggested several posts back (post #32). So here you are, in a state of recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and recycle and .........................What do you think?My strongest suggestion is to report to post #32. I've not heard you mention the exercises and their outcomes yet, so should we assume that you seek help but refuse it also if it requires effort? Terrified, I don't mean to sound insensitive, calloused and lacking in compassion and understanding-- it is the most compassionate and kind thing to do to be direct and up front about these issues, otherwise you'll continue to suffer and ruminate into your 20's. Our continued entertainment of each angle, thought, rumination and pecadillo does not serve you and in fact keeps you from truly making progress. In this regard, we may be doing you more harm than good.My strongest suggestion is for you to stay off the boards except to report your progress on the exercises every 3 days. This way you'll be working at solving the problem and not just talking about solving it. What do you think? What do others think? I'm certainly open for suggestions and ideas. Warmest regards,David Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted December 31, 2009 Author Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 (edited) g Edited July 11, 2013 by TerrifiedUser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 (edited) Good Morning. Hey, the fact that you still beleive I am not a pedophile Julian (I don't think any of us believe you're a pedophile based on what you write-- we seem to understand it clearly but you're struggling with this. The natural question would thus be: Does Terrified know more or something we don't?) is a huge releif to say the least. I guess I have been posting waaay to much, and so David, I will start your exercises properly. (N0...No...No... you can't post too much, we all post bunches, look at my 690+ posts or Malign's >930 posts. I should maybe get a life! Nope, the only issue I was raising was that you not replace posting here about pedophilia and do what hard work lays ahead. I would rather you posted to help others, which you've done and to describe your exercises to let us know how it's going. Terrified, I'd never ask you or anyone to not post-- this is what the forum is about: I'm only concerned that posting may come to replace therapy or the real work ahead-- that's it. I'm so sorry if I misstated my point, please accept my sincerest apologies.) My suggestion would be that you post elswhere, maybe 3 posts per day in the anxiety or other section, thereby sharing your wisdom and compassion, which you have based on what you've responded to on other threads.The reason is new years eve partys and the like, and I just want to find an answer to my problems so I can enjoy myself. My suggestion is to be yourself, natural and smooth and don't try to force the issue in your head. that will give you and us unreliable, faulty and invalid data. Have a fantastic time!Oh and I am absolutely certain I am not arroused by most pictures I have seen, mainly because I never think of them except when I worry Oh, and threads like this certainly don't help with me trying to come to terms with myself: http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2892 This is understandable and you seemed to have handled it very well. Gpd luck tonite, enjoy yourself to the fullest and ignore all internal messages of pedophilia, save those for the designated time.Good luck,David Edited December 31, 2009 by David O Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 1, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 1, 2010 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 1, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 1, 2010 (edited) g Edited July 11, 2013 by TerrifiedUser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 2, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 2, 2010 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 3, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 3, 2010 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O Posted January 4, 2010 Report Share Posted January 4, 2010 (edited) OK Terrified,I'm going to give you a little bit of a hard time-- you've posted 3 times at 3 separate time-frames which suggests that you're not following the prescribed program outlined several posts above. I'm not giving up on you, I'm only pushing you to be self accountable and self responsible so that you can begin to worry and obsess less and live more.Terrified... do not pass go, do not collect $200-- please go back to point A (post #32) and do the exercises. If you must post, then respond to other threads not at all connected to your issue. Terrified, none of us can help you if you're not willing to try the exercises, and I fear that our continued responses to your every feeling/emotion/anxiety/fear/obsessive thought may be feeding your anxieties and allowing you to not work thru the issue. It's much easier to write in and get a response than it is to sit in your space and learn how to desensitization yourself thru the exercises. We may be doing you a disservice by writing back to you, I suspect. For this reason I'll stop responding for 1 week and then pm you to see how you're doing. My warmest regards and I'm pulling for you,David Edited January 4, 2010 by David O Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 6, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 6, 2010 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O Posted January 6, 2010 Report Share Posted January 6, 2010 I think the police are after me again. The police don't play, as you know, when it comes to child porn. If they were after you you'd be writing to me from a cell right now while Tyrique, Julio, and Jeffrey were eying you!:eek: You see, ages ago, when I was 16 I read an article on teen nudism, and saw a picture of some girls who looked too young, which I mb to memories of. At the time (this was before my computers got searched) I didn't think to much of it, although now I have started to worry about it again.Anyway, I stupidly searched the image, because it just had teen in the name, and teens can be legal, so I thought it wouldn't look too suspicious.However, there was a message at the bottom of the search results saying how one link had been blocked because it contained cp. Reading this convinced me that the said search must also be monitored as well, and reading that has been making me quite literally feel ill. All the repressed memories of the incident have been coming back. I can just imagine the police knocking on my door and discussing this with my parents, and it makes me want to cry, I feel so low, like as in not just depressed, but lower than everybody.David, now that college is starting again, I'm going to know when I'll definately be back home, so I promise I am going to start intergrating your exercises into daily routine, but right now these thoughts are completely stopping me from functioning at all. Life is tough, especially when most of the problems we have, have never really happened! Terrified, go to school, enjoy your life-- I want you to be successful as do those of us who've come to know you thru here. Sorry to be so direct, but I think you need to hear this.Take care of yourself and we'll talk in 1 week, let's shoot for that regarding this issue.Ciao,David Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 6, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 6, 2010 (edited) g Edited July 11, 2013 by TerrifiedUser Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 7, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 7, 2010 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted January 7, 2010 Report Share Posted January 7, 2010 Dude, the FBI doesn't "come and seize equipment" without a warrant, which requires them swearing before a judge that there's sufficient evidence to justify a search. Okay, you might not know that, in the UK, but in fact, it's based on British Common Law, so it's probably somewhat similar there.They didn't get that from this one file.I assume, then, that the article doesn't discuss what else this guy was doing, that caught their attention. I'm pretty sure it's not just viewing one file labeled "college girls". I was also amused by the phrase "accidentally downloaded"; I guess "accidentally" is his word for it. "Accidental" will usually show because there's only one; it's the guys with hard drives full of this stuff that they want gone.So, unless you're actively plotting sedition, or something, I still don't think we're to the point of worrying. You're safe right now, because you're not doing anything that is even remotely criminal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerrifiedUser Posted January 7, 2010 Author Report Share Posted January 7, 2010 g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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