Stupid fam trouble

[Sweetmom2]

My 3yr old bites. We are getn help frm occupational therapy cuz hes struggling with adhd. Hes got a couzin 3 days apart bt his dad (my husb brother) refuses to let them play together. We live in the same town and the kids love and misses each other. It really kills me

[SweetSue]

Hi Sweetmom2

Is there maybe a chance that your husband and his brother can have a chat with each other and try to clear the air a little, maybe suggest ways that the kids can still play together.

All 3 year olds are a bundle of joy, and a lot of toddlers go through the phrase of either biting, pinching or pushing. And although this is obviously a distressing time for the parents of the child that either does the biting or the child that got bitten, it is important to remember that this phrase your son is going through, with help and guidance from moma and papa will pass.

Im glad that your family are recieving help from OT

I hope that the kids are soon out in the garden and playing happily together, and needless to say creating mischief

Take care

Sue

[mscat]

My 3yr old bites. We are getn help frm occupational therapy cuz hes struggling with adhd. Hes got a couzin 3 days apart bt his dad (my husb brother) refuses to let them play together. We live in the same town and the kids love and misses each other. It really kills me

Hi Sweetmom , Welcome to our community. This must be a difficult situation for you and your family. Many three yr olds go through a phase of biting. Does he talk well? Sometimes if a very young child has a hard time verbalizing , he could bite out of anger. Anger is the primary reason anyway why a small child may bite anther. It is a shame that the kids have to be a part from each other, because biting can be managed. Managed by close adult supervision. Catching the child in the act is a great teaching moment , and then the adult can see excatly why your son feels he has to bite and it can be dealt with more in a teaching manner then a disipline manner.

I taught preschool for over 20 yrs and have a degree in early childhood development. This is not really out of the ordinary behavior for young kids to bite each other. Either its over toys , or some other desired object...

The problem is that when the young child bites and learns he can bite , to get his way , he will bite again and again. Like I said it is usually out of frustration that a little one bites. He is not trying to be a bad child, just a very frustrated little guy.

When he is together with other children he needs to be closely supervised at all times , so he can be taught other ways of handeling his frustrations . hese little guys are impulsive too , so it can be a chalenge to find out why he feels that he has to bite other kids .

Telling him NO bITING all the time will reinforce the idea not to bite , but you have to tell him "all the time" Having 2 of the same toys also helps prevents little biting incidents .

[Sweetmom2]

It really frustrates me. We are using naughty chair(sothat i cool down aswel). Bt the uncle refers to him in such a manner and even cald him a dog(he wasnt present).we are family and betw us theres 5 kiddy b-days and 6 adult b-days. Its the time my stress levels reaches sky high. Sorry for being negative.

[IrmaJean]

Hi sweetmom2. I have three children and every one of them went through a phase of biting. I wouldn't see this type of behavior in a three year old as unusual or anything to be overly concerned about. In saying that of course you want to take steps to prevent your child from doing this. In my experience, sometimes overly strong reactions with kids reinforces negative behaviors. I would take a look at the situation and see when he is doing it. He's learning to express himself and emotions can be so difficult to control. I would gently, but firmly tell him this behavior is not acceptable. Have him apologize and then redirect or distract him with something else.

I also understand how upsetting it can be for us parents when we feel as if our parenting abilities (or our children) are being judged by others. Try and not let others affect the course you take with your children. When you respond consistently and calmly, this type of behavior should eventually calm down. Age should help some as well. As your son matures, he'll learn more appropriate ways to deal with his emotions. Hang in there and stay the course with your son.

Good luck and I hope this helps some.