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My brother


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Good morning PetPerson,

This is really a tough one, and I'm so sorry that it has come to this, my heart goes out to you and your family because a child with anorexia results in a family with great pain and anxiety. Following is a list of things you and your family can do (remember, anorexia is a family affair, there are both heavy genetic elements-- but not always; other family dynamics, and the ever present images in our culture about weight):

  • Consider joining NAMI, the national alliance for the mentally ill. They have many resources ans I think even lists of qualified clinicians in your area that can help. Nami can connect you to local support and informational groups. http://www.nami.org/
  • Join the National Association of Anorexia-- much support, resources and help there: http://www.anad.org
  • Read, educate yourself about Anorexia and eating disorders- go to Yahoo.com (avoid Google as it doesn't filter very well) and start reading. Focus on issues of family dynamics and recommendations for families, but also read up and try to understand the body dysmorphia.
  • You may not be able to do much about it, but the family as a whole can. It will require some changes in family functioning and I strongly encourage you to seek out an excellent, well versed and experienced family therapist, one that understands eating disorders and has worked with this issue successfully.

I'm sorry there is no quick and easy solution. This will require great amounts of sensitivity, compassion, understanding and patience on the part of the family. Change will be slow and only persistence and patience will bear fruit. And the fruit will be saved life!!!!

Good luck and please keep us posted,


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Hey there ThePetPerson. =)

I am no professional in regards to deceases like anorexia, I merely know what it is and what it does to you, as you have also already roughly described; he won't eat, he becomes underweight, and we both know of the danger that is present, which is also the cause of your apparent worry. Many here know a lot more than I do, I will try to help you in ways that I can, but I am sure others will provide better help.

For now, stay strong.


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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Petperson,

The most challenging problem with anorexia is the fact that the person is in total denial that there is a problem. There is no use arguing. All you can do is tell them how thin they are and run for cover.

Your brother needs professional help. I suggest you get his parents to take him to his Medical Doctor, have a physical exam including his weight and a discussion about the options. He really needs to have weekly weight ins and to start talking to an eating disorders specialist.

All I can tell you is that your brother and family are in for a difficult time ahead because he will stubbornly refuse to see the problem. If his weight goes too low, he will land in the hospital and that is often the first step to getting help. However, he should be brought to the MD now, just to get the process started. Perhaps the MD will have a meal plan for him?


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