Need help

[hello9]

I've posted here before and I haven't really fixed my problem. Well to start off I'm pretty sure I've had attention problem my whole life and I'm really slopply lazy and all the other stuff that has to do with ADHD. The problem is that I'm always finding ways to be socially akward or annoy myself all the time. Like this is my typical thinking when I'm leaving the house "I'm going to go to the bus stop and since I can't help it I'm going to dart my eyes around and follow the cars with my eyes since I can't help it. On the bus I will not be able to stop the socially akward moments since I always create them and I'm sure they will happen." It's like I've made myself sure all these bad things are going to happen like it's imprinted and there's no way that I can stop them. Now my eyes are really sensative to driving cars because I'm sure that I can't help it and I will follow the cars with my eyes because I'm sure I can't help it. What's worse is that I'm sensative while walking down the street and I'll follow people with my eyes and make them anxious (in turn making me more anxious). It's like it's implanted there and I can't do anything about it. Now if I watch a window while it is in motion (a car or bus driving) I will always lose my attention and follow objects with my eyes because I feel like I can't help it and what I'm doing is really weird and socially akward.

So what is my problem ADD, ADHD, OCD? something else? This problem is really all I think about these days and I've given up trying to block out thinking about it. Will ADHD brain stimulant medication worsen my condition? I'm not sure what the problem is so can someone please help. I can't even site across someone in the subway system anymore since I'm so sure that we are going to get into a akward situation.

[finding my way]

one thing I've learned being here on the site is how important self talk is... the stuff you are saying to yourself. Can you maybe pay some attention to what you are telling yourself? Right now it seems quite negative and limiting.... can you think of other things to say to you? Also, there are many relaxation techniques to try... do any of them help you?

I wish you well today!

[Luna-]

This must be awful, and quite relentless. Finding my way said it well: what we think and say to ourselves has a HUGE influence on how we feel and what we do.

It seems to me that you keep saying to yourself "I am going to do X since I can't help myself" and the more you say you can't help it, the more self-fufilling a prophesy it becomes, and the less you can help it, and then the more it happens, the less you can help it, then the more it happens, then the less you can help it.... What hell this must be.

It actually sounds as if saying "I can't help it" is making sure that you can't help it and that this is "working" very well. What would happen if you said something different?

There are ways to change that self-talk so that you can replace "I can't help it" with more helpful phrases and get a better outcome. Have you ever read anything about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? It addresses our negative self-talk specifically. It takes some practising, but it can really make a difference.

I'd really recommending going to a therapist to talk about this. S/he can then tell you whether medication may or may not help. It's worth a try. (?)

What do you think?

[Guest ASchwartz]

I remember your previous posts and can only urge you to get yourself into psychotherapy. We cannot diagnose you or your problem because this is the internet. You need to see a psychologist or licensed clinical social worker to get the answers and the help you need.

Allan