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mutual friend in hospital


katleen
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  • 6 months later...

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Edited by tash28
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Tash,

There's nothing wrong with caring about your friends, and it's very easy to pull up old posts with a search ... I just thought it better that you know Linda's okay than to let you keep worrying. There's nothing to be embarrassed about.

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Hi FMW, ahh today was a shutdown day and cancelled my therapist appt. I know she is very upset because she told me I cant do this and no matter how I feel, I need to get my butt to her. I guess she cant get to the tough parts if I cancel when I am in one of those times of something really bothering me...

My husband took one look at me and said, time to go to the hospital? Of course I said no. I can be very stubborn and of course after 4 yrs of this I have learned how to hide alot and not say too much. But, my eyes give it away...

Yup I know not the best thing but my pdoc is away and he is my inpatient Dr as well and last time I was in, I left with no meds and very quickly so no assholes trigger me worse. So actually the psych hospital is a toxic place for me and I need a womans program.

So maybe the residential place (Timberline Knolls) is an answer but I dont want to commit to a program that I will probably shutdown for when stuff gets tough and I cant regulate myself.

Thats all I need is to go to an inpatient hospital halfway across the states and far from home... Not good...

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Linda,

Sorry to hear you are going through such a tough time. When does your Pdoc return?

I agree with your therapist about getting to the appointment when things are tough, like now. I also know how tough it is to do that, very tough.

Just know that we are here for you and are always supportive of you.

Warmly,

Allan

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Hi Allan, thanks for asking :)

well my new therapist want s to send me to residential (Timberline Knolls) in Chicago. I shut down you know that. And I think after all of this, I just dont have the desire to live. I'm not suicidal but she sees it as "sabotage" so how do I get through sessions???

Protection, walls go up, I don't know anymore.... and I certainly don't know how to look at my life and get the mental energy or desire to do anything. So that just cirlces and spirals around the flat life I am living. So why do I want to live?

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Linda,

Perhaps going to residential treatment would be good for you, perhaps not, I don't know. However, what does concern me is that your therapist calls your not wanting to go as "self sabatage." It concerns me because it seems like blaming to me. I am not implying that she is not a good therapist but just that I have questions about that particular response. Instead of making a comment like that, she should be exploring with you why you do not want to go.

And, so, why do you think you do not want to go?

Allan

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