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Was it normal to say?


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I wrote about this in another category, but thought that maybe it was easier to get an answer from those who has been abused themselves or know what abuse is.

First I don´t like the idéa that this is a friend of my ex abuser ( not sure do I want to be friend, I´m sure he has other intentions)

but anyway, no big deal, I am not attracted to him and he is not a threat.

I just have a question. I have been abused in relationships and childhood. Out of the blue he asked me what love is for me ( HE IS SUPPOSE TO BE A FRIEND) I said to him I am afraid no one will really love me, that I´m not good enough to be loved. But that I one day hoped I would get that love. He said I will. We who are abuse survivors know this insecurity comes because of the abuse and insecurity and lack of feeling safe and loved in childhood.

But when I said I don´t feel good enough and are afraid I wont be loved he also responded with saying it´s because you love yourself.

Is that to be misunderstood in any way, is it normal in any way to say this?

I just know if it was me I would have said of course you are good enough to be loved, you are worthy and so on. Not that he loves himself, like he was selfish. Everyone knows insecurity has nothing to do with selfishness.

I don´t understand why he said that.

NOTE : When we drove home in the taxi, he said he should take taxi further home to himself, I let him fix taxi as he is a taxi driver himself, but when the taxi stopped outside my home and I wanted to go in and say bye, he went out of the taxi so I had to let him go in with me. I was thrown off balance. Inside he asked out of the blue what love is for me and then he said this. I know this was not a good move from him. It was late, I was tired and he just decided to go into my home without even asking first in the taxi. To me That is seen as an abusers tactic.

He also said : " do you have feelings for that person?? because you have mentioned him twice now". His voice sounded a bit annoyed. He made me feel it´s better I don´t mention him again. Maybe this guy is an abuser too, like his friend ( my ex abuser), I think more and more so.

Edited by sadgreeneyes
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