What is wrong with me?

[confusedboy16]

(I'm not looking for answers, just advice)

Hey,

For a while now, on and off, I have been worried about being a "pedo". A have masturbated over younger people, nearly 100% of the time these boys have been sporty. I love sporty boys. Yes, I'm gay. I have a foot fetish. I'm confused. I don't think I "love" children. I know whenever I see a sporty "boy" have be it 10, 15, 20, I become aroused? I don't fancy them, I just love the idea of a sporty boy. I don't even know if it's an arrousal. I hate the thought of being a pedo, it scares me. I'm trying to be honest, and as explicit as I can be. I don't feel any urge to have sex, with anyone, let alone a child. The thought of having sex repulses me. It's like I get excited when I see sporty people, have be it "children". Whilst at the same time thinking "get away from the child". I'm not saying I don't feel like a pedo, I'm saying I truly don't feel like I'm attracted to children. I don't think about children that often. Only when my OCD is playing up. I feel like I'm just indenial. I'm just scared...

[IrmaJean]

Are you seeing a therapist, confusedboy? Try to distract yourself from your worried thoughts. What hobbies/interests do you have? How has school been going?

[confusedboy16]

Hello Irma,

How are you?

No, I am not. I do not want to. I don't have many hobbies. I don't like to go out, incase I see any children. : S