Idle For Years

[big loser]

Not sure were to start,I am a father of 5,4 girls and 1 boy,I was a commercial aircraft inspector.And now I am nothing,Iv been in the suicide ward for 7 days,a year ago.and I have been in my room for over 2 years,no job,no income,when i was in the hospital.i was diagnosed by a dr. who never even talked to me or even looked at me .she was doing her diag from a police report.the hole time i was in there no one even talked to me, they just prescribed me zyprexa.witch made me feel like i drank a 12 pack and i dont drink.it was a joke a bad joke.I am still married but havent spoke to my wife in years.seems when you get a mental health prob evryone runs for the hills.the only one who has tried to help is my mom.she has suported me in this time of need.and i feel horrible about it.when you dont have money or insurance even the medical comunity looks the other way.my best friend who i grew up with hit om my wife during all this.so i have no friends.and i mean none.I think about the past way to much trying to figure out where I went wrong.and im afraid it all started at age 3 when my dad drove away and left us.my mother re- married and divorced my second dad about when i was 14.so it would take me a year to tell you everything. my brother and sister are all messed up too.so that is why i suspect it all started with abandonment.I know you people cant help me.so honestly i feel this is just a waste of time.i scored a 89 on the depresion test.So you can see why i say i just dont know where to start to tell you my problems.

[paula]

Hi big loser

Welcome to this site! Don't ever think that your post is a waste of time! A problem shared is a problem halfed! We all have problem's. Some more complex than other's. I can just hear the rest of them saying, 'you can say that again', so for the rest of them, we all have problem's, some more complex than other's Ha!

seems when you get a mental health prob evryone runs for the hills.

I fully understand where your coming form with that statement! No one want's to know? It's to much trouble for them!

so i have no friends.and i mean none. Don't let it worry you! They're not friend's anyhow! Friend's wouldn't do that!

Listen! None of us are perfect! If we was all perfect then we'd get bored with life very easily! We all have our own set way's?

You mention that you was on a Suicide ward (Psychiatric ward) last year. Don't worry about it! So was I! And I've been back since! Shit happen's!

What I'm trying to say is that we all have times in our life when we think life isn't worth living? It's the way our brain thinks! Even Royalty must get Suicidal? They can't even lead a normal life? They have to be protected every minute of every day! Would you want to live like that! I wouldn't! Money's not everything! It help's but it also brings sadness along with the happiness. As long as you've got love and a good heart then that's all that matter's! You won't go wrong if you follow your heart?

One thing to remember...... Mental Illness isn't anyone's fault! All you can do is accept the fact that you could alway's have it? Treated with medical help, it can be controled. Treat it the best you can and go on. It's not the end of the world! It's just a new start, to a new beginning!

Take care!

[mrsdz]

You are not alone! Scroll around on the boards and see for yourself. I have had nothing but good encounters here, the people are very friendly and caring.

I myself do not have any close friends out in the real world. Best friends I had for years slept with my boyfriends (premarriage), since I have married I had another hit on my husband. I can relate to that totally. As Paula said they were not your friends, friends wouldn't do that. Trust me when I say you are better off without than having a one sided friendship. As far as the doctor treating you that hasn't even spoken to you, that just isn't right. I would tell you to change doctors but by the sounds of it, you do not have a choice at this time.

I am glad to hear your mother is by your side. You said you haven't spoken to your wife in years, Have you seen your kids?

I hope you stick around. I think you just might like it here. :cool:

p.s. Big Loser doesn't sound fitting hope you don't mind B.L.