Struggling with feelings of inferiority

[harp]

I have so many unimaginably soul draining things I'm going through right now, but I have never had any idea where to start with them. So right now, I've decided to start by writing down this piece of my destroyed warped mind. I've had this pre-occupation since I was about thirteen that was a deep disturbing fear that females were inherently inferior to males because they were physically weaker than males. It started because I saw a thread on an Internet forum which had something like this written on it:

"Poor, misguided souls.

Don't you understand? Men are better than us.

Seriously, think about it, how do you think they managed to oppress us for thousands of years?

Because they're pigs? No.

They're physically stronger than us.

You've got to ponder this; we didn't have dumbells back in the stone age. Those who brought home the kill were the ones who were the strongest. And who was that? Men. They went out hunting while we stayed home, most likely making primitive axes.

Men became pigs once they realized they could control us."

And she wrote a couple more irrelevant sentences after that and that was it.

Now it has dragged on and when I look at and think about society as it is the pieces start coming together. Why are women forced into the sex trade so very much more than men? Because they're weaker than, and thus inferior to men. Why do men deserve to live free of the fear of being raped and women don't? Because they're stronger than, and therefore better than women. I've been through so many injustices before (being forced into a psych ward unlawfully, isolating myself from others, etc.) that I never thought twice about not being wrong or deserving better because I was a female and therefore, inferior to half the human race. I've never talked to anyone about this in real life before despite it being in my mind for so long, so I'm desperately seeking for someone to respond to this.

[IrmaJean]

I'm sorry you are feeling upset about this.

Let's say what you speak is true and men are (generally) physically stronger than women. How does that make women inferior? It is simply a difference. Women are able to give birth while men can't. That one fact doesn't make women superior to men, does it? I think you may be placing a judgment on the differences.

How have you come to the point of equating physical strength with worthiness and value? That might be worth thinking about.

[clawz]

Greater physical strength does not make one person better than another person. And I would hesitate to say that mens power rests on greater physical strength - some women are physically very powerful. The social/political power comes from a belief in male superiority - regardless of individual male physical strength. This belief in male superiority and the right of males to dominate and rule those deemed weaker (women, children) is called patriarchy. Often times there are benevelont reasons offered for male rule - religious reasons, men are more intelligent, physically stronger, morally stronger, and so on. These beliefs are damaging.

I think it is very sad that as a female you've felt inferior, but I don't think that is an odd experience in to have as a female identified person in this world. The messages are there - in the treatment of rape, especially. The lack of female voices in our history textbooks does little to give women a reason to see themselves as equals. However we live in changing times and the influence of feminism has done a lot to make women's lives - their contributions - heard and thus deserving of consideration - equal to that of those who were born with external reproductive organs.

I think you are wrong in assuming that physical strength gives someone the right to rule over another. I would encourage you to seek out strong female voices in history - women who speak out against such injustices. Men have spoken out about such injustices as well. You see, if we believe that all life has an inherent worth and dignity - we can not condone the right of force. We can not condone the right of those with any kind of power - physical, political, or religious - to abuse or subjugate those with less. This line of thinking makes it ok to beat children, rape women, enslave races, etc. It's not ok.

This is where as women we have to be strong and believe in the dignity of all people, especially our own dignity. Sexism is deeply rooted in our society, it's built into the language. We have to continue to challenge it, and that starts in our minds. From there it extends to the world at large.

Just because women have to live with the fear of rape moreso than men does not mean that women deserve this, or that men don't. It is simply a reality in our world. For a long time many people condoned rape in their willingness to ignore the reality of it, or worse yet, blame the victim. But this is changing. The fact that the fear of rape is a reality for many women does NOT mean we deserve it.

Who knows what the beginnings of patriarchy were - why women were subjugated. There are many theories about this, much more complex than "men were stronger." Please, do the research for yourself and do not listen to the sexist b.s. of others. I would not doubt that physical strength has played a role, however I have always seen that the domination of the earth - the advent of agriculture - and the domination of women has a sort of parallel story. Our ancestors worshipped female deities as well as male ones. At some point the sacredness of the female was mostly abandoned. The world became lopsided.

As one poster said, female bodies have strengths, one of the greatest is the ability to give life. Perhaps the fear of this power caused our subjugation in history. Who knows. It's for you to come to your own conclusions, but I urge you to look for the strengths in women and to see that strength and political/social power do not make one superior to another. True strength simply is - but what we know to be strength is the ability to dominate and abuse another - it is exploitative. To challenge this, we must all challenge the right of any group of people to dominate, abuse, or subjugate others.

[Mjolnir07]

I have so many unimaginably soul draining things I'm going through right now, but I have never had any idea where to start with them. So right now, I've decided to start by writing down this piece of my destroyed warped mind. I've had this pre-occupation since I was about thirteen that was a deep disturbing fear that females were inherently inferior to males because they were physically weaker than males. It started because I saw a thread on an Internet forum which had something like this written on it:

"Poor, misguided souls.

Don't you understand? Men are better than us.

Seriously, think about it, how do you think they managed to oppress us for thousands of years?

Because they're pigs? No.

They're physically stronger than us.

You've got to ponder this; we didn't have dumbells back in the stone age. Those who brought home the kill were the ones who were the strongest. And who was that? Men. They went out hunting while we stayed home, most likely making primitive axes.

Men became pigs once they realized they could control us."

And she wrote a couple more irrelevant sentences after that and that was it.

Now it has dragged on and when I look at and think about society as it is the pieces start coming together. Why are women forced into the sex trade so very much more than men? Because they're weaker than, and thus inferior to men. Why do men deserve to live free of the fear of being raped and women don't? Because they're stronger than, and therefore better than women. I've been through so many injustices before (being forced into a psych ward unlawfully, isolating myself from others, etc.) that I never thought twice about not being wrong or deserving better because I was a female and therefore, inferior to half the human race. I've never talked to anyone about this in real life before despite it being in my mind for so long, so I'm desperately seeking for someone to respond to this.

Hi Harp,

I want you to know that your agony is nothing to be ashamed of and my heart goes out to you. Perhaps I can shed some insight into this topic from a man's point of view.

I am a very strong, burly, masculine man. Here's a demonstrative picture

Everything from my physical stature to the apparent attitude suggested by my facial expression fits the image we're talking about here.

Yet I will be the first one to tell you that my wife is superior to me in every conceivable way. I may know how to thoroughly fix and construct things, open pickle jars, and get obnoxiously rowdy, but more importantly, it is perfectly within my natural power to be petulant, to intimidate, harm, destroy, and abuse pretty much anyone I so choose. On the other hand, it is, too, within my natural power to protect, defend, cherish, nurture and above all else respect. You see, my father taught me something that for a reason I cannot comprehend has been absent from the parenting of young men in recent decades; he told me, "Son, you must be strong, proud, fearsome, and rough around the edges but still be gentle, quiet, calm, pacifistic and peace loving.". The dichotomy in men is profound, they seem to wholly either be mean, loud, angry, and destructive or weak, meek, passive and submissive. It's just like you said, when a man discovers he can, he does. I'm sorry to admit to the truth in this, but I hope you find some encouragement in knowing that there are a few of us who look big and scary but would break down and cry if forced to kill a cockroach. Seriously, I will not kill cockroaches. I won't kill anything for that matter, no matter how small the life. At our last apartment we developed a roach problem and my wife was constantly asking me to kill them. Knowing the effort completely in vain, I with my bare hands picked up somewhere in the vicinity of a thousand individual cockroaches and ushered them safely outside my house, at the behest of my wife. Last month at the bus stop there was a young man, not too much younger than I, who approached with a young lady. I saw him give her a shove, and by her reaction I couldn't immediately tell if they were just messing around, she was kind of giggling. He continued in this fashion until he reached the bus stop with her, where he proceeded to grab her with one hand on her elbow and the other on her shoulder and SHOVE her into the bus stop waiting kiosk. Right there, in front of me. It occurred to me all at once that she was giggling out of intimidation, not wanting to treat the situation as severe out of fear of this man, who may or may not have been her boyfriend, I never found out. I was blinded by shock and rage at this audacity. I, who will not kill a cockroach, reached over and grabbed him by his neck and proceeded to shove HIM, face first, a good solid four times, right there into the glass that he had been shoving her into. He fell down, stood up, spit blood onto the ground at his feet, looked at her, looked at me, and then dizzily walked away, leaving her there and apparently forgetting that he intended to ride the bus. I hate violence, but no one else was there to protect her, not even his friends who were not too far away would raise even a word to speak against him. Looking at him, and looking at me, side by side, you wouldn't know the difference. But there is a difference, men like him shouldn't be. I have many, many faults myself, and am not one to say that I myself should be, but if I shouldn't, then it certainly isn't because I think it's ok to hurt people just because I can. I have no qualms about hurting other people who hurt because they can, however.

I could do a great many things for myself due to my gender, but if I'd never known my wife, I know for a fact that I would by sobbing myself to sleep every night. A man like me, who prides himself in being quite manly, would be nothing without a woman to protect. I protect her physically, but she protects me in so many more ways. I hope that I am providing information that will lead to this conclusion: There are men who exemplify everything that it means to be a man who recognize and acknowledge not just that women have their own qualities but that you, with your gender qualities, are far more wonderful creatures. So what if I can lift heavy things? My wife watches out for our mutual well being, I depend on her for everything, everything, she has a natural understanding of the world that is completely absent in men. My meager contribution of making sure no one threatens her pales so much in comparison to what she is capable of doing for herself, for the world, honestly.

Men don't become pigs. Many pigs are born looking like male human beings. Real men look up to women and believe in the calling to do whatever is necessary to preserve them, not to abuse them.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Harp,

I really want to shed some light on this issue just so you can be a lot more proud of being a woman.

Back in Ancient Greece, Rome and other parts of the ancient world, both before then and after, women were the warriors. Yes, they were. And they distinguished themselves by defeating male armies at the time. You can look this up to prove it to yourself.

More recently, women have proven that they can be just as strong as men. For example, women live longer than men. Women play against men in many sports and they win. There are many women police persons who are just as effective as the men and who are so capable in the martial arts that they shock many criminals when the put them down.

I have a wife and two daughters. I am proud of them and what they have achieved.

The world is open to you.

Allan

[randomperson]

We each have unique strengths and weakness. I like to believe we are all equal.

[Athena]

Your thread reminded me of something I wrote recently in a fit of rage:

Dowrys, stoning, rape and oppression

Keeping women down is man's obsession

Mutilation, burkas, beatings and veils

Jealous men and all that entails

What's the point of marriage then?

Bad for women, good for men?

In the western world, we earn half the money

Then take care of the kids, unlike our"honey"

In dowry land you buy your mate

Then a lifetime of slavery is to be your fate

In burkaland, you are hidden from view

Some forbidden to go out for an hour or two

If we want a man in our lives we will seek him out

But marriage won't be what it's all about

Sperm donor, companion, lover at most

Don't expect us to resume our former post

But for now, I cry for the women of the world

Until a new order gets unfurled

We must band together, throw off our chains

Our life, our freedom is ours to claim

I do not think that the above would indicate that men are the least bit superior. I think it means the world still needs a better definition of equality. Neither east nor west have it figured out yet.

(I apologize if this is offensive to the wonderful men here, I seem to keep running into, getting abused by and reading about the other type.)

[chatterbox512]

Hi Harp,

I just want to remind you that even though women are in geneal seen as the weaker sex. We don't take it laying down (pun intended). We have always fought for what we need or want. In the late 1800's women were only seen in the home or as teachers, but now they are seen in every aspect of the career. We have criminal lawyers, judges, police officers, etc. We don't just sit at home taking care of the kids and the home. So even though men may be physically stronger, we (women) are the real fighters. We have to work harder to be at the same spot a man can and still take care of the home, kids etc (and we don't get the choice about it). To me that does not say WEAK, that says STRONG, and many times stronger than a man.

[harp]

I'm sorry you are feeling upset about this.

Let's say what you speak is true and men are (generally) physically stronger than women. How does that make women inferior? It is simply a difference. Women are able to give birth while men can't. That one fact doesn't make women superior to men, does it? I think you may be placing a judgment on the differences.

How have you come to the point of equating physical strength with worthiness and value? That might be worth thinking about.

Because physical strength gives you the power to stop others from controlling, coercing and torturing you, and what does giving birth get you? Excruciating pain and a torn vagina?

[IrmaJean]

Giving birth also gives you a beautiful child.

Physical strength is no guarantee either. There is only so much anyone can control. Have ever considered taking self defense classes? Having those skills may put some power back into your hands.

So much in life is about balance. Too much of anything is never a good thing.

[CantGiveItAway]

Women are not inferior to men at all. Every person deserves a certain amount of respect and rights and understanding. Do you think a midget should take any crap from a regular person because they are smaller? If aliens came to earth and were like 20 feet tall, do you think we would surrender to them if they wanted to harm us to say do what they will with us when the biggest man on earth is now the smallest? We would fight to the death because we deserve to live freely and unjustly harmed as any functioning being. I saw a show on tv a few months ago where scientists or whatever was putting people through various activities to test peoples force and strenghths and one was to see how strong this small woman boxer's punch was against a huge man they had there when punching a person in the face and stomach. The force behind the woman's punch was like afew hundred more pounds then the man they had there. Technique is way more important then strength. If you are feeling unconfident with how you think you can defend yourself then go take a self-defense class or martial arts or boxing or whatever you think would interest you. If could do so much for your self confidence. People like Jet Li and Chuck Norris aren't big guys. Everybody has that strength inside them.The only reason women get raped more is because I would guess more rapist are hetersexual men. If more men wanted to rape other men they could do so. If women wanted to rape more men they could do so. Men can be just as easily be preyed upon even big and strong men. You do not in any way should feel less then a man. Just because women have been oppressed in the past doesnt mean that they didnt have important things to offer and didn't contribute and influence things all throut history. The relationship between men and women are just different. We are not any better than you.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Harp,

People have given you lots of great thoughts about women and men. I am wondering how you are reacting and if its gotten you thinking?

In addition, historically, women have been among the most powerful rulers in the world, Queen Elizabeth 1, Catherine the Great, etc. In modern times women have made some of the best and most powerful leaders and Prime Ministers in their nations: Golda Meir, Indira Ghandi are just two.

Where and how did you get such negative ideas about being a woman?

Allan

[randomperson]

I have been thinking about this thread and many others on here lately..

it seems around 80% of the problems we all have stem in some way from people treating us bad.

For many women it is guys cheating on them or abusing them. This thread tells it clear enough.

For many guys it is about all about being ignored by women and deep painful emotional abuse some cause on purpose.

Strange enough the same effect happens regardless if your a man or woman. You are left feeling inferior and like there isn't any hope. Over and over the same pains pop up from so many of us.

And the thing is you can't group any of it up. Can't say all men or all women are bad. It just seems so very hard for the good people to meet each other lol.

[58corvette]

This Topic definitely caught my Interest;

For me Personally it has been Women that have changed my Life in the Last Seven Years & not for the better; at least not at this Moment in Time.

I consider myself a Respectful Man & Person. My Ex wife left me & I lost quite a bit during & after Divorce to the point I lost My Dignity & Self Worth, Respect & Confidence.

Then a New Female Principal was Hired at the School I worked & I ended up having to Transfer & Eventually Quitting as a Direct result of Her.

I relocated into another Line of work where my Boss was a Female (also Gay) & she hounded me to no end. However we ended up on very good terms & she elected me Employee Of The Quarter. I earned her respect. And she mine on equal terms. It did not matter our Sexes or Sexual Preference. That is the way it should be.

But then I moved back near my Children where the other Important Woman in my Life (My Mom) ended up Breaking my Heart as my Dad was Dying in Favor of my Little Brother who is a very Manipulative & Bitter Person himself with his years of Drugs & Alchohol Abuse.

So I have become very Jaded towards Women do to all of this. And I think Justifiably in many ways.

But my Point is Women have just as Much if not More Power than Men these days in so many ways. That does'nt make it right either way.

And I still believe we need to be Equal with Mutual Respect towards one another & our Strengths, Weaknesses & Differences.

Women Suffered for Many Years. That needed to Change & it has; which is good.

The Key is Balance & Mutual Respect towards one another. I know that. So please dont get me wrong if I sound Jaded, Biased & Judgemental. I truly am not. But part of my Point is Women can hurt Men in other ways Men can hurt Women.

But I still Believe in My Heart there are just as many good well meaning Women as Men. It is simply a matter of Respect & Mutual Understanding of our Differences. There will always be that Physical Difference between a Man & Woman; That is part of what makes us unique & Attracted towards each other. But Women have there own Strength of Survival & many times can Multitask much Better than Men.

So as I continue to Try & find My own Balance, Belief & Strength Again as A Man & Most Importantly A Person I will continue to believe there is A Woman out there who has the same Morals & Beliefs about Men, Women & Life in General. That is part of what gives me Hope to Carry On.

[sensitive_woman]

Mjolnir07, you are THE man!!! I think your wife is a lucky woman! :-)

[Athena]

But Women have there own Strength of Survival & many times can Multitask much Better than Men.

Maybe some women can multitask better than men. I suspect a great many of them are deluding themselves. Due to women's lib, they can now work for pay and that suits men just fine. And the women are stupid enough to take on the roles of wife, mother AND bringing home the bacon. Rates of Fibromyalgia among women age 35 - 55 are skyrocketing (chronic pain and depression basically). My ex stood and watched me lug heavy luggage up the stairs as I moaned about my back. Just stood there and STARED at me! He used to leave his full set of golf clubs in my car. I'd go grocery shopping and have to lift them out. I can't do that - I'm too weak and it kills my back. Of course it happened when he was out, so I just had to slide them out as best I could. I usually ended up hurting myself. Then he quit his job. YEAAAA for equality - NOT!!!!

[58corvette]

Hello Athena;

I noticed you used one of my quotes in context with your last statement. Im sorry if I affended you in any way. I was simply trying to compliment Women in certain general aspects of everyday life & what they have had to deal with throughouy the years.

I am sorry this happened with your ex & the pain you dealt with during your pregnancy. Women's Lib has had both Positive & Negative effects on both our culture & Women & Men.

When my Twin's were Born because of the difficulties we faced with Babysiter's & Preschools during my oldest Son's first Five years of life. I made sure My ex-wife was able to be home with them full-time to make life easier on all of us.

During this time I worked 7day shift's rotating every week from days to swing to graveyard shifts. It was very, very tough. But I knew I had to support my Wife & Children so that they may have a decent Life & Home.

I understand your bitterness. Sometimes that door swings both ways. Equality is such a fine line; that many times can only be achieved by Balance, Understanding Differences & Communication.

The Best To You Athena. Sincerely; Jim

[58corvette]

Hello Athena;

I noticed you used one of my quotes in context with your last statement. Im sorry if I affended you in any way. I was simply trying to compliment Women in certain general aspects of everyday life & what they have had to deal with throughouy the years.

I am sorry this happened with your ex & the pain you dealt with during your pregnancy. Women's Lib has had both Positive & Negative effects on both our culture & Women & Men.

When my Twin's were Born because of the difficulties we faced with Babysiter's & Preschools during my oldest Son's first Five years of life. I made sure My ex-wife was able to be home with them full-time to make life easier on all of us.

During this time I worked 7day shift's rotating every week from days to swing to graveyard shifts. It was very, very tough. But I knew I had to support my Wife & Children so that they may have a decent Life & Home.

I understand your bitterness. Sometimes that door swings both ways. Equality is such a fine line; that many times can only be achieved by Balance, Understanding Differences & Communication.

The Best To You Athena. Sincerely; Jim

[58corvette]

Sorry for Double Post Everyone;

That was not intentional; I just lost the post again & somehow I was able to save (Not lose) it but it ended up Double Posting.

So The Positive I did'nt Lose it (YAA). The Negative it double Posted; oh well im trying & still Learning Computer "Stuff".

[Athena]

Jim,

No offense taken. I know it was meant as a compliment. Most women are proud to say they multitask. I think they just haven't woken up yet. Twice I have been told that I am "too proud". Once in Cuba, once in China, both many years ago. I have such a horrible memory so I've always wondered why I remembered hearing that. The answer has finally come to me in crisis. I was too proud. I was proud that I could do it all - the successful careers, the wife, the mother. If a guy asked me if I wanted help lifting something (not my ex, he never offered), I'd decline. I was strong enough. Now I accept all offers by guys to 1) lift heavy stuff for me, 2) buy me a drink, 3) let me out of the elevator first, 4) open the car door for me, 5) let me have their seat on the subway.

And that's just the short list. However, I think I will continue to drive my own car. I have recurring nightmares about my ex driving me off a cliff, or into oncoming traffic, or down a slippery slope.....

[flander]

And that's just the short list. However, I think I will continue to drive my own car. I have recurring nightmares about my ex driving me off a cliff, or into oncoming traffic, or down a slippery slope.....

Was he a rotten driver and/or do you think he'd be able to perform a murder/suicide?

[58corvette]

Your Reply means A lot to me in many ways;

I often feel guilt that somehow I am not a Man of Today. A lot of the "Stuff" in todays Society I have become confussed by in regards to our Roles as Women & Men.

I try my Very Best not to Sound or Be Biased or Jaded by Today's Woman & Women's Lib. My Dad was a Very Classy Man & Gentlemen. I have tried my best to be just that. But even my Dad shortly before he passed away (& saw the Effects my own Divorce had on me & my Kids) said to me he would not get married in Todays Society. Him & Mom were Married 60yrs. Happily & Best Friends to the End. When my Little Brother asked him the Secret to Life shortly before he Passed away, He Simply answered; "Find A Good Woman".

And he was referring in many ways to exactly what you just brought up. Unfortunatly right now do to my own situation with no job, cofussion as to who I am, having Trust & Abandament issues, Being Jaded, Mental Issues & Weakness, lack of Confidence & that is somewhat of a shortlist for me also.

I obviously am no catch or give off any Attraction to a Woman right now. But I will Always Love the things that Women have to offer that attract a Man & Women together. Recognizing our Differences, Respecting that & just the Feeling & Knowledge of Love & Friendship is something I will Always Miss & Long for.

You seem like a Very Classy Woman to Me; that has seen, expierienced & recognised our differences. As I said Women Suffered for many years in ways that needed to be changed. For me with my own Marriage, The Court System & other influencing Factors that Pendulum Swung to far in ways I was neither Prepared or Ready for. I continue to hold out Hope for Myself.

Again I am Sorry your ex never offered to Help you lift in times of need or any time for that matter. We as Men (Not All or Always) can be Blind, Self Serving, Selfish & Lazy many times. And the Nightmare you have of Him ending your Life & the Fear Associated with that must be Traumatic.

My own Recurring Nightmares (and they have eased up a bit FINALLY through the years) are generally in regards to being a Family Again. But they are still Nightmares as I wake up to Reality.

I would Not Hesitate (to this day for you or any other Lady) to Lift Heavy Objects, Buy you a Drink, Let you out of Elevator First, Open Car Door or Let you have my Subway Seat. That to me is Common Courtesy & the Gentlemanly thing to do.

Again the Best to you Athena & I Sincerely hope your Nightmares Fade Away & you Find the Peace, Happiness, Love & Friendship you Deserve.

Sincerely; Jim

[Athena]

Was he a rotten driver and/or do you think he'd be able to perform a murder/suicide?

He's a pretty good driver. And he lives a pretty nice life because he knows how to "Win friends and Influence (Manipulate) People" into doing what will benefit him at their expense. So he'd probably never kill himself. He feigns guilt then does the dirty deeds over and over again. So I don't think he has any issues with himself. He's pretty full of himself. The ultimate narcissist. I think he plans to engage in "assisted suicide" - ie: dragging out the divorce so long that I'll do myself in.

The dream is a pretty direct reference to him screwing up, then I get impacted by the problems he causes (finding out he forgot his suitcase once he's arrived at the hotel 3 hours away, running a money losing business for 7 years and dragging me down into bankruptcy with him (or would have if I'd let it get that far), developing a lower back problem which resulted in him never helping me with anything physically. That led to his back problem curing itself, and me developing chronic back pain due to doing the work of two people at home.

[Athena]

I would Not Hesitate (to this day for you or any other Lady) to Lift Heavy Objects, Buy you a Drink, Let you out of Elevator First, Open Car Door or Let you have my Subway Seat. That to me is Common Courtesy & the Gentlemanly thing to do.

Again the Best to you Athena & I Sincerely hope your Nightmares Fade Away & you Find the Peace, Happiness, Love & Friendship you Deserve.

Sincerely; Jim

Thank you and you truly are a gentleman Jim. I sincerely hope you get back on your feet. You have tried so hard, and your heart is in the right place.

PS: I'll let you in on a little secret of the "modern professional working woman". She is in competition with all the other modern women. She runs around doing the career and having the perfect home and garden and raising the perfect children. Because that's what all the other women are doing. Not to do that would be "not keeping up with the Joans", my feminized version of the saying. If I see another Christmas tree that has Martha Stewart written all over it, I'm going to barf. And these are women with kids the same age as mine. (My Christmas tree has almost all the homemade decorations my kids ever made, with all the ornaments that were given to us over the years by family. There's no theme, no particular colour scheme, and it has "Kids tree" written all over it.) But Christmas is for my kids, not to "one up" my female friends.

So the next time you see a "totally together" modern woman, think twice. Ask her what she'd really like to do with her time, ask her if she takes any time for herself, ask her if she really truly is passionate about both her job and her role as mother. And if you see her in the Mental Ward a few years down the line, don't be surprised.

[randomperson]

That is the problem so many of us are messed up in some way or another, yet few of us admit it to others. Judge the ones that do have the courage.

I realize the thing holding most good people from making true growth is people causing pain. Why? Why must some people hurt others so deeply?

..I just don't understand that state of mind.