Rapha Posted January 12, 2011 Report Share Posted January 12, 2011 I would like opinions on my psychotherapist's behavior near the conclusion of my therapy. If you haven't read my whole story (which is quite lengthy), click here to read the thread.Here are a few excerpts from that thread:Finally to transference, the whole point of this post/thread. It has been really strange working with my psychotherapist since Song Day. As I mentioned earlier, I wonder sometimes if he has a clue. It seems just a mite odd that someone who uses [multiple lines] following his signature to list all his degrees, specialties, areas of expertise, etc. (takes up nearly the whole darn page) would not recognize this as transference, particularly in the case of someone who was doing as miserably as I was when I began PT and OT. [Remember I was completely non-functional for the five months prior to starting PT and OT.]Everything I did for and gave to the therapists - the song, the comments, even a little tribute album I made for Priti, I gave to my psychotherapist because I had nothing to hide. I was thankful for and excited about the amazing part Priti had played in my healing, and wanted to encourage and affirm her to carry on and help others to heal as she had me. I was confident that once Priti and Traci understood where I was coming from, they would breathe a sigh of relief and all would be well in the world. Alas, that never happened.As I said earlier, the comments were more deeply personal than the song. The countless allusions about Priti reminding me of my daughter, my wife and my mother all seem to point toward transference. Having read just an hour or so about it online, I believe this is what happened.Incidentally, I came extremely close to overdosing on drugs two days after Song Day, in great part because of the way my psychotherapist handled me during his terse three-minute monologue the day after Song Day. I have NEVER been anywhere close to taking an overdose before, despite years of depression and chronic pain. Until that day.Several weeks later, the psychotherapist told me just how negative Traci's (the OT’s) reaction was toward me because of the song, I bawled. I have cried numerous times since then, something I hadn't even been able to do for at least two years before meeting Priti despite my incredible physical pain. One night I wailed uncontrollably for fifteen minutes. Scared the hell out of my wife — she wanted to take me to the emergency room — and I don't know what my kids thought of it.I want to give you the exact details of what happened with my psychotherapist over the nine months I saw him. So here goes.I had been depressed continuously for seven years when I started with him, with the most recent two of those seven being in severe depression where I could barely work at all. I had not been able to work a forty-hour week since 2002, and when I started psychotherapy with him I had been virtually bedridden and almost entirely non-functional for the previous nine months.My psychotherapy schedule with Dr G consisted of 30 minute appointments (which he usually shorted to around 27 minutes) and proceeded as follows:1/5, 1/142/1, 2/9, 2/163/2, 3/9, 3/16, 3/304/13, 4/275/116/157/208/11, 8/24 (Dr G did most of the talking - not therapy - on 8/24)9/8, 9/21 (no therapy on 9/21 - we interviewed Dr G)Adding up the sessions, this is less than 8 hours of total psychotherapy over a 9-month period for someone who has been in moderate to severe depression for eight consecutive years.I am a Christian, and while I generally didn't bring up my faith in therapy, he seemed to be constantly alluding to it. It seemed to make him uncomfortable for some reason, as though he had to apologize for suggesting certain approaches to mental pain management and healing. I felt from the beginning as though he was uncomfortable with me and my wife, which of course made us feel uncomfortable with him.One other strange thing happened. When my wife would accompany me, his entire demeanor would light up and he would very enthusiastically interact with her. I don't know if he realized he was doing this, but it was quite odd and made me feel uncomfortable about him.I was so out of it that I didn't really take in much of anything those first several months. I certainly don't remember much. I guess I just went and talked. The one thing I remember doing was reading the Jon Kabat-Zinn book Full Catastrophe Living, which he had suggested. I didn't find it particularly helpful, though the deep breathing helped me relax some.Once I started PT and OT in March my mental health and functionality improved some. There are several factors which contributed to my improvement in the late spring and summer. There are obviously the positive feelings that I had toward my therapists, including a deep adoration of my PT in the first two months (through later May). There were the therapies themselves which were top-notch. There were the longer, sunnier and warmer days which can help with depression and chronic pain. There was the fact that I lost enough weight by March to finally be able to wear my prosthesis again. There was the fact that I would go out two or three times per week for about an hour each to spend time in the sun so I could get vitamin D to combat the depression and heat to combat the chronic pain.The improvement had nothing to do with him. By then he was seeing me just once a month for less than 30 minutes anyway. I've heard recently that for someone in severe depression, they should be seeing a psychotherapist at a minimum of once per week for 50 minute sessions. Any thoughts on this? I'd like to know if psychotherapy once a month for 30 minutes can be effective with someone who is severely depressed.On July 20 of last year I had an appt. with him that my wife joined me for. (She came to a number of my appts., which I've also heard is not a standard way at all of working with a patient. Is this right? Does the psychotherapist normally work with the patient alone without a spouse or significant other present some of the time?) Anyway, at this appt. — which was only eight days before Song Day (see my other thread for details) — I and my wife were very concerned about me. I was nearing the end of six months of therapy by him and professionals in other disciplines at the pain management clinic, at which time I would be evaluated as to whether I would be considered totally disabled or not. We asked him what he thought my prognosis might be. He very clearly stated to us that we did not need to be anxious and that he would be recommending that my employer put me on total disability. (The final decision regarding disability status rests with my employer, not with the medical professionals.) He told us that just because I could interact with my wife and kids again and do a few things now did not mean that I wasn't totally disabled work-wise, which was reassuring to us. I had finished my OT in June and had also finished my course of PT treatment, having just the final evaluation coming up on July 28, which I call Song Day. On that day, my PT evaluated me. Then at the end of the appt., my OT joined us and I performed the song I had written about my PT. The next day, July 29, I was at the practice in the morning for an IV therapy appt. when my psychotherapist came in and sternly told me to see him immediately after I finished. So I did. I figured it must have something to do with the song I performed yesterday. I prayed before I went in, that I would listen well and not be defensive. But I wasn't quite prepared for what I received.He proceeded to talk at me for three minutes, never once asking me any questions about what happened the previous day. I cannot give you the word for word of all three minutes, but it was such a shock to me that many phrases are emblazoned in my mind for eternity.Dr G (in a threatening tone of voice and a seemingly out-of-control tirade): "What you did was inappropriate. It crossed the boundaries. [My Last Name], you're weird. You do some really weird things. You've got boundaries issues all over the place. Asking her to a concert and using the Employees Only door and — well, I guess someone told you to do that. Traci couldn't believe that you would do that to someone. I can't believe a Christian would do that to someone. Most atheists I know would never think of treating someone like that. You are to stay away from the PT/OT area. We don't think there's any danger, but you are not to go back to the PT/OT area. If you see Priti or Traci in the hall you are not to talk to them. You can say hello and that's it."I was stunned. I nodded my head, speechless. At one point I protested his comment about "asking her to a concert", which was totally untrue (not sure where he got that one). I did say that several months ago I had asked her if she wanted to try putting on a real putting green (I had just gotten slim enough to wear my artificial leg again and was starting to go out into the sun to get Vitamin D). Eventually I told him that what he said made sense. After all, I had done the song out of context. I didn't know what else to say.[continued in post #3] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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