sensitive_woman Posted January 16, 2011 Report Share Posted January 16, 2011 My brain feels numb all the time and I have a problem concentrating on anything. I cant even finish reading one article in the newspaper which I pick up to read. I am getting worried everyday about how I am going to overcome this. Medically I am fine though I have started getting migraines on and off. I worry constantly. I can have so much going for me professionally but I'm afraid of living through life all alone. I think I'm still in shock about whatever happened in my marriage. I never thought this would happen to me. I got divorced recently and I never dreamt I would. I always thought of myself as an adjustable and caring woman capable of solving all problems and dealing with all situations. I failed to save my marriage and I could not help my ex with his addictions or problems. That is killing me every single day of my life. I just cant function like a normal person anymore. I isolate myself from people, avoid social functions and get togethers and just feel the need to stay alone. I dont pay attention to what I eat and I constantly think about my failed marriage all the time. How do I overcome all this? Help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted January 16, 2011 Report Share Posted January 16, 2011 Sensitive, I'm separated and in the process of divorcing, myself. One thing caught my eye pretty strongly: "I always thought of myself as an adjustable and caring woman capable of solving all problems ..." Leaving aside the perfectionism, I would submit that getting divorced is not failing at marriage, but instead it's a solution to a marriage that cannot succeed otherwise. I think it might help you to look at it that way, especially after reading your description of your situation in another thread. One thing that none of us get to do is to change someone else, only ourselves.Have you sought treatment for your anxiety? It certainly sounds severe enough to be impairing. There's also a grieving process, when an intense relationship ends; I wouldn't expect you to function as you used to in social situations, right away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sensitive_woman Posted January 16, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 16, 2011 thanks Malign. I did seek help from a psychiatrist and he said that I dont need any meds. He said as long as I keep myself busy in work, get regular exercise and do breathing exercises I shall be fine. He said that its just anxiety which I would overcome with time and a good support group. I see what you said about perfectionism but honestly I never thought I would ever get divorced, though it was the only and right alternative to whatever happened. But somehow I cant get over it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sensitive_woman Posted January 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 17, 2011 Malign, I'm sorry I did not mean to sound like I'm perfect, I'm not. I try to be more accomodative and adjustable than most people and think I can work out most problems but in the case of my marriage it didn't work. I'm just hurt that i did a lot in this marriage and was always unappreciated and feel cheated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michmomof1 Posted January 17, 2011 Report Share Posted January 17, 2011 Ive been divorced for two years now and sometimes i wonder why it failed then i remember all the times where hed cheat on me, wouldnt work because of so many excuses, and made my self esteem so low that i still to this day havent been able to make it better but im working on it . I worry alot constantly myself but then i realized its pointless to worry about things or people who dont worry about me. why put myself through all that? I myself thought id never get divorced. This was my first one and his second. I thought id be with him the rest of my life but then things change and sometimes change is good.Youre not alone, its always good to find out that there are people that are going through similar situations. Ive been isolating myself but the good thing i do is come here and find out that im not alone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sensitive_woman Posted January 18, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 18, 2011 michmomof1 (((((hugz)))))You're right. Its nice to know that I'm not alone and there are others who are going through or have gone through similar situations. I don't know if change is good. Right now I'm not ready to accept it or move on but I guess time is the best healer.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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