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Correcting Mistakes


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It's funny just a few days ago I posted on another site. That at least I have a place to go where I can express my true feelings & what is on my mind. Without worry, remorce or judgement. That place Was here.

Recent events changed that; & have have realised this site to in many ways is no different than the Outside World or other Community sites.

That's Ok; From all of this I learned another Valuable Lesson about People, Groups, Favortism & Most Important OPINIONS; Yes Everyone has Them. The nice thing is since this is My Own Thread Or Post I am able to express those To a Point Without offending Anyone.

As in any Neck Of The Woods; we all have those we feel confortable with; those we dont see eye to eye with & those we just keep our distance from. I always wish the Best For Everyone, Single, Married, whatever it may be. Life in General is Tough Enough for EVERYONE.

How we react to it & others is an Ongoing Process. So Although I realise this really isnt about Popularity, PittyParties, or Bashing Others. It is another Place SIMPLY to Live & Learn.

I have learned a few things over the last few days. But it is nothing I have'nt dealt with before. Just that no matter "The Safe Place" there are still Limits. Eventually I will move on from this Site & My Life Will Go On & the World will see another Day. All That Good Stuff.

Out of it though I have gained the Knowledge that like any other Endeaver in Life I myself have gained More Knowledge & a few I feel Confortable with in being myself.

Again I Remain The Same; That's Who I am

The Very Best To All

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So True;

And It would be nice for this Thread & Post to be A place where All People can come; Be Themselves & AGREE to DISSAGREE. Without Rash Words or Personal Attack.

And I just read your other Post Linda in regards to Police & The Conflicts that arise out of Abusing Power. I hope it all get's Better Somehow Linda; For all involved. Many Times it is A Fine Blue Line.

In regards to being Adults & Testosterone again very true. As long as People are Aware of just what makes them tick or sets them off that is always a beginning of Self Improvement.

I appreciate your ongoing Voice Of Reason Linda;

Sincerely; Jim

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I'm glad to hear you are at last getting to grips with the site (thinking right back to when you first came here!)..

I think the great thing is, we are all real people, even behind whatever masks the internet allows us to wear i think it is really amazing how the essence of the person behind the post comes through with communities like this..

Unfortunatly i remember once in my younger days running a sucsessful series of websites and communities and being highly respected by a lot of people, some people i never met would have trusted me with their life and i would have done the same for them.. Then because of issues with the police (the 'darker shadows' of the police) i was forced to abandon everything. It's left me feeling guilty for the rest of my life and scarred my character (contributing a lot to my mental illnesses and flaws)..

I wish everyone well..

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Thanx Guy;

Appreciate your Comment & opinion. Fot me I think the thing that has Scarred me Most is Trust & Abandanment of Family.

As I told my Son Yesterday I am Completly Aware of People Around me; Whether it be Here on this Site, other Inernet Sites, Work, and any other place we become Aquaintences in Life. That is why I Truly can count Friends I Trust on A Few Fingers.

So for me it has always been Family when the Cold, Real World comes crashing Down on me; To Fall back On & Trust. But Divorce & Death Continues to Conspire Against that. So rather than bringing Closer Together it has Torn my Own Personal Family Apart.

Which inturn has continued to Scar my Own Charactor, Mental Issues & Flaws. My Own Dad's recent Death being the latest Sad example of this.

It was One Year Ago to This Day He Passed Away. Dad & I were Truly Friends as he grew Older & We were always there for each other when we Hit Rock Bottom.

The Best To You Guy;

Sincerely; Jim

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Hi Jim, I am truly sorry things got so out of hand, I think we all have our flaws and issues that we come here to get support in working through them.

I really think we can choose to work this all out and move on and hopefully return to the way were. We are human, with variety of disorders, and difficult even complex lives. I have lost friends before, but I always feel a sense of loss when that happens,,I don't want to loose anymore.

I only hope my apology for blowing up was undestood and not taken out of context. I am truly sorry for my behavior.


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Hope it's okay to peek in here.

Reminders of loss can be difficult and painful, Jim. I imagine your father found great comfort in last years knowing that he had a true friend in his son.

I'm sorry if anything that happened here on the forum caused you any upset or pain. I agree that interactions can help us to learn. I'm glad that you are here and a part of the community. Take gentle care tonight.

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Hey Guys,

well I have had my own issues here on the forum Jim so maybe I have "learned" a little bit from them?

I too have been in your shoes, Shannon's,Brodmans shoes and Hotspots shoes of posting reactions so I understand the reaction that occurs with being upset , hurt or feel like people here have other agendas.

I think although I left this forum for a while over it and some reactions of feeling not validated here for my reactions of triggers I guess I have learned something from those situations.

It is hard here on forum where communication and reading a person's personality is really hard or it can be really easy I think this place of communication can make us feeling even more hurt because it takes alot more of us to "trust" others here so when the first sign of negative feelings occur they can almost be magnified thus posting some really nasty posts. And that person will never apologise because that is exactly how they feel...

BUT, what I love about this community, and although not everyone responds to all posts and that in of itself can really annoy some, they(other members) are reading, moderating or whatever and help does arrive to help us all get through the issues.

And I think it was Allan who said this forum mirrors our lifes issues just as the space in therapy does as well. But playing it out here or in a therapists session helps us tremendousely learn what we didn't all our lives. And this is to agree to disagree, cope with those disagreements and accept and move on with life in a healthy matter.

I think that is the key and point to all of the disagreements here on the forum and sometimes these blowups are actually good because it does teach us what life didn't. Some will get it, some will just keep badgering of intent that they were "right" about the issue but bottom line, accept and move on. and it isn't who wins or loses but it is how we can encourage balance in our heads when conflict arises.

I hope someone here from my past can agree or disagree about conflict on the forum? Because it is you guys who have taught me the most about conflict, non abandonment and unconditional acceptance... and that spilling into my therapy space has helped me with some pretty nasty conflicts in my own "real" life

so thank you, you all know who you are :rolleyes:

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Nice post, Linda. :( I definitely think that interactions here on the forum can be microcosmic of our in-person relationships. I've caught myself projecting a fair number of times. :rolleyes: This is always something to learn from and we can then apply those lessons to our daily interactions with others. So we can teach each other and also learn more about ourselves in the process. A positive thing! A lot of positives can come out of conflict if we are willing to look at the causes and behaviors. This helps us come to a greater understanding and balance. It also helps to strengthen the community.

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Nice post Linda. Corvette I am sorry all of this kinda blew up bigger than it should have for everyone. I just saw the tail end of it.

Your right there is no Utopia on Earth. But I have been in and out of forums for a bit. The difference is people listen and care here. That is different.

I can't tell you how many times I came so close to crashing and burning again to have someone be it you.. any number of people to say just the right words to pick me up.. keep me trying.

Forums.. texting of any type I found it is flawed. Doesn't express who we are all the times. Emotions come out mixed and confused often. It is one thing I think hurt me in online dating and also with my ex. Makes it very easy to get into fights especially if your like me and just write what you are feeling at the time. What makes it really bad is I have been so mixed up lately.. I'm sure I sound half crazy sometimes lol.

The key is just like you say to use this as a place to learn and grow.. and most of all use it as a place to find support and comfort when you are hurting. That is the true blessing of this forum and the good people that post.

As always wishing you the best! :P

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I think I came off on another Thread & Post a little missunderstood again from what I ment?

Not anything bad at all; it's just a bit funny how words & meanings get misinterperted from what you really mean sometimes.

Anyway; eventually it all irons itself out one way or another. The Negative & Postive affects from some of this has just been amazing to me over the last several days. Nothing I expected & certainly not any of the negative Stuff. Some of the positive Stuff Brought people Closer together again; so thats good.

Delicate Issues, words, meanings, feelings, communication. All Powerful Stuff.

Again my Intent is Always well meaning. The Triggers both Positive & Negative depending on (another Word Here) Moods including my own are again sometimes Fragile & Delicate.

Balance & Control is Vital for many situations. One of my all time Favorite Songs that expresses what I Truly Hope & feel for All People is; "Imagine" by John Lennon.

Again; The Best To All

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I think I am back on the mend, still a little shakey, but Linda saw something that I didn't and now that it has been identified I think I can face it (like the song Linda sent me).

I had that the many years ago I had layed to rest my PTSD issue far behind, now thats a bit "arogant" of me. It sneaked up and bit me so hard on the butt, I didn't know what was happening. Hence the blowup and run mode which can be very strong. I would like to say I have now learned something more about myself through all this.

Linda and others have also taught me there is something to be learn through this even the conflicts, who says our personalities all have to be the same, wouldn't that be boring.

I will continue to ease back into life and move on from here, such a learning lesson for myself I must say.


PS, I am not so could at computer stuff, but if you want to listen to the song Linda posted for me in urgent forum its there, it expresses everything I was feeling and still feel a bit....thanks

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You are so Intuative Linda. Ya it's back to REALITY.

1) woke up a bit Down. Trying to kick start myself.

2) I Must fill out more Job apps. TODAY.

3) My Son; After a few days where he thought he may have to go to Emergency Room; (Physically his having some serious issues) and I think I know why?; he is doing a little better.

So in a Nutshell that's where were at; at the Moment.

Thank You so much for asking. In many ways you are helping & keeping me in line. To what is Real & needs to be done.

How are you Linda? I know you have a few Major Concerns with your Health & despite it all you continue to show & express Concern & Help for Others.

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