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I am crying


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I cant stop crying, I have cried 3 hours and prayed to God he come back.

I txt to him 3 hours ago when he said its finish, that I just wanted to say one last thing to him, that if he one day changed mind I would be here. I said I will always love him. And that I please asked him not to txt me back ( as I knew it would just hurt me as he is leaving me, because his parents wants him to be there, the parents who did let us marry, I dont understand it)

If he really loves me he will come back. Because true love never dies. True love is patient, never stops believing, never stops hoping and never gives up.

I am still crying. If God wants us to be together and all the times he has said he just cant do it, to divorce me, and if he really loves me as he said yesterday he will come back. I havent eaten at all today. Just crying.

Well, I did move things out from the living room for clearing the energy and thought maybe it would help me little, but it doesnt, and I put away the gifts as it hurts too much to see them. I got thoughts I dont care what happens down in Amman. I feel my life is over, cant live without him. I dont know what to do if he says we are divorced, I many times want to throw up daily, I feel so sick.

I dont know how to bear this loss. I see no tomorrow. I feel I will die of heart sorrow, seriously, the pain in my chest feels like tightening in the periods I´m not crying. The tightening comes when he has just put me through the same pain again, like 15 times now. If he say we are divorced tomorrow I am scared how much tightening I will feel.

If this really is because of his parents, does it still exist that I have been emotionally abused?

Edited by sadgreeneyes
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Hi Greeneyes,

I am sorry for what is going on in your life and your pain. I understand your pain fairly well as it is not too dissimilar to what is happening to me in a general sense.

Right now you need to talk and you need to survive. You need to understand that you will be happy no matter what happens. You will not feel this, but you must realize it intellectually.

I feel my life is now empty and pointless, but I know it will get better. I cling to that slender thread as best I can.

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Thank you for replying waiting, I´m sorry you are in pain too.

I just know that if he truly loved me he would not leave me, we would find a way no matter what and he would wait me.

I know that I truly love him and I would be patient and never leave him no matter what. If I were in his shoes and was the one waiting I would never give up for us to be together, I would wait for him.

It is unconditional love. If he truly loved me I would be loved unconditionally too.

I try to hold on to this thought as this is the truth for me and for most people who truly love each other. They dont give up when they know they would finally be be together. This is the only truth for me.

Edited by sadgreeneyes
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Thanks Greeneyes,

I am caught in a similar trap and I don't know what the answer is. I am told I must realize I have a life and far more than just this relationship, but at the moments as much as I know that, I can't feel it.

I am doing my best to have hope, even though I am uncertain it is a good idea and it doesn't seem to help.

Right now I am simply talking to people and trying to survive, try to do the same. We will both get through this no matter what.

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