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single moms dilemma


hell2breakfast
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OK, so I have this friend right? and like, she is my very best friend and all right?

OK so here is the deal, the poor dear has like four kids right? well, three by her ex and one by her ex'es cousin, anyways, she is like 24 and has four kids to feed so she comes to me for money to feed the kids sometimes right? cause times is hard and all, and like, her ex is a really BAD person, and nobody will like give this girl a break but me (we understand each other) anyways she like, can't hold a steady job cause she always trys to do the right thing and like, go by the book and all, well she always gets fired because other people are jealous of her, she told me this herself in a moment of weakness and I know she wouldn't lie because we are like best friends and all, (and besides, I can tell when people are lying having studied psychology 101) Anyways, she has so many problems what with the three kids and all and not being able to find a job (she has had three jobs in the last year so I know she is a good worker but she always gets fired by an insecure boss so she sometimes comes to me for money to get some oxycontin or valium or

something for her nerves. Which she wouldn't need if her own father hadn't thrown her out of his house...what kind of father would do that to his own child? and on top of that her own best friend threw her out three weeks later. her ex won't pay his child support. in spite of it all she is doing her best with the four kids ages 7, 6, 4, and 3 Honestly I don't know how she can be such a good mother in spite of all the bad stuff that has like, happened to her, you know, her kids are well behaved! all she has to do is yell at them once and they all sit down in a perfect row and don't say a word!

Ok so here's my question, should I go and talk to the ex and try to get him to man-up and do the right thing, or just continue helping her emotionally and financially? My heart tells me he needs a stern lecture, but would it help do you think?

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Hi h2b,

Sorry Im not quite with it today (like when am I ever :().

I guess it is truely hard to bring up 4 children by herself ~ actually I know it is.

Erm, I hope that your friend is okay, and Im sure she is grateful for all the emotional and financial support that you give her.

Sorry but I'm not so sure that you should give your friends ex a stern lecture, it may only cause problems for yourself, and maybe even for her.

Is there a way that you could have a quiet talk with your friend and encourage her to get some councelling, or some kind of help round the home, to help take off some of the pressure of her daily life. She sure sounds like she could do with some extra support :)

Take care

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