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Hi im harry and help


redbate

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I'll probably post a proper post on the depressions page or other page... Let me think through.

I have problem with my anger i've had many people such as my friends telling me that i have an anger problem. And i think so too. I'm still in high school in New Zealand but I already crave alcohol time to time for my self to forget tings.

I think my anger outlet is kind of different from other people. Most people far as i know usually lets out their anger soon as they get angry or keeps it in then eventually forget about it. I'm the latter but the problem is that i do not forget the anger i remember it till the END OF THE TIME! so i casually let people take piss at me then i would feel my anger gage(as i call it) then let it out at the random time. Also i play many games to relieve my self of some of the stress and the anger but playing some of the games seeing as im not the god or anything many things bull##it things happen but i dont throw my controller at the wall or anything i just go on and think to my self oh well s#it happens... and just remind me "Keep Calm and Carry On". But the only problem is that i cannot do this in real life. Few days ago i broke my Kindle by throwing it at the wall when i suddenly got angry at my self for being a worthless human being. I really would appreciate it if you guys could help me. Thank you for reading this and ill be really grateful if you could leave a response. I also have many problems but i cant think of them right now. Just ask. Also i dont really have "true" friends. Most of my friends are willing to laugh with me but not share my pain...

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Welcome to the community. :)

I'm wondering how are the relationships in your family? Any painful experiences in your past? Sometimes anger can have deeper roots, and it can be secondary to other emotions, such as sadness. I hope that you have a school counselor or family member who you can confide in and receive support from.

Take care.

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to be truthful my dad was usually away on work most of time when i was young... And even when he was home he would yell at me and stuff for the bad things i have done not tell me good things about things i have dont(if u get what im saying here). Even till this day im scared of him kind of. And his mates probably know him better than i do..

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Hi, Harry, welcome :)

There are ways to overcome anger issues. I'm sorry I don't know much about the process, but I know that professional help can be very useful also in this kind of problems. A counselor or therapist can lead you towards understanding the very roots of the anger and also teach you some techniques for practice. Maybe there are also some books for "patients" about this problem - you could try to search for some (?).

I remember one short "story" my therapist shared with me in a very different context: Once he had in treatment a boy / young man who was abandoned by his father as a little baby (and didn't remember the father at all) and all his life (or maybe since puberty, I don't know the "details") he hated his father and because of being so full of the hate, he was often very angry and aggressive towards "everybody". I'm mentioning it here only as an example of an irrational reason for anger with which it's possible to work in therapy and overcome the problem with the anger.

Have you felt anger towards your father? Or was you often somehow punished for expressing your anger as a child? How your parents used to respond to your ("normal") angers? These and probably many other questions may be relevant...

Being only criticized by your father, you didn't receive in your childhood the love, praise, support and other important things that everybody needs to build his healthy self-esteem :(. (There are many works showing that the love and prise from the mother is not enough and even that the appreciation of the father is more important for self-esteem. I've read some because I'm also interested in this topic due to my family situation ;).) Your anger is obviously not your only problem (as you mentioned you'd post more in a forum about depression and that you don't have close friends) and the other problems might be related to this...

Feel free to write more about yourself here or in a forum you chose :).

Take care!

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