Why do women compare the two...

[Jessie]

All the women we get to be with tend to have this expression anyhow.....at least when we don't have our trousers on... lol ...

[thouroghlyunhappy]

lol, true---so true.

[tonyala]

I've been following this post for a couple of days. I'm a woman and I've been voyeuristic about the topic. Not out of malice, but because this story has stuck with me. I'll be doing something else and I'll start thinking about you all. After reading the female blogger's comments, I thought I'd like to chime in.

First of all, I want to say that I've dated a couple of guys with very small penises. The first guy I ever fell in love with had about 4 inches. Another long term boyfriend had about 3 inches. I won't blow smoke up your ass and say that I was thrilled when I saw them for the first time, but it wasn't a deal breaker with either guy. I never looked at it like they were withholding dick from me just to be an asshole. It happens. God knows if they could have had a bigger penis, they would have.

I completely appreciate and respect your self-pity. And to women who would say that it's just like having small boobs, I say "Please have a seat." It's NOTHING like that. Your manhood is entertwined with your penis in this society and it's so easy to believe that little penis= little man. Women with small breasts take some crap, I agree but this just isn't in the same ball park.

Now about that blogger... I'm a blogger too and I blog in the same vein as this woman. I've also blogged about small penises. The difference is, I've called out women who make nasty remarks about a guy's sex organ. And I believe that women like that are small, nasty and trashy. WHY DO YOU DATE WOMEN WHO ARE SMALL, NASTY AND TRASHY?

You're right. I don't know that you'll ever meet a woman who will clap her hands in glee when she finds out that you're smaller than average. Not that it won't happen, but realistically it's not likely. But is acceptance really all that terrible? Sometimes we just have to accept things about someone that we love. Things that maybe aren't perfect. But they're not deal breakers. They're just things.

OP, I can tell that you're severely depressed. You've got issues beyond your penis size (which, by the way, sounds as if it's right around normal to me). But damn, don't KILL yourself over this. It's not your fault and it's not that big of a deal. I'm too old now for most of you but back in the day I was actually quite hot. Trust me, I was. And I'd have gone out with that Brady guy in a heartbeat because he's funny and smart and sincere. THAT is what's important. How much time do you actually spend having sex in a relationship anyway?

This is already super long but I'm going to wrap it up by saying that both of my boyfriends who were smaller than average were really gifted in other areas. Compensate. Learn to accept. Being angry at your penis isn't going to fix anything. And neither is suicide.

[Needingsupport]

I'm relatively new here so I'd just like to start by saying hi to everyone. I will also state that I too am unfortunately unhung. I don't feel the need to whip out measurements as it seems rather counterproductive to any healthy thoughts I'm trying so desperately to achieve. I suffer very severe depression and social anxiety due to size (also due to sexual abuse), but am trying to overcome these issues because it IS possible. I'm learning to deal with my problems and I urge everyone to do the same. Life won't get better for us if we continue to wallow in self pity. Please don't take offense to that, I've certainly done my share of self pitying. It also doesn't help our psychological state when we catastophize situations with women. I long thought the same way. Always scared that I'd be laughed at or found out and had that dreaded small dick rumor spread around. But you know what, it doesn't matter. We shouldn't let it change who we are on the inside. We are all human and we all have flaws. If someone is going to laugh at you for something you can't change or had no control over to begin with, they don't deserve to be a part of your life. We need to be proud of who we are as people and stop focusing on looks. To whoever it was who said something about guys with small dicks only being able to end up with "ugly women," that's offensive. That is the same kind of judgement you claim about women laughing at our misfortune. I'm not trying to be mean or rude by pointing that out, it just struck me that someone who is hurting so bad about his own issue could be so careless in choice of words. I also tend to agree with everything cece posted on this thread. Mostly so about us putting our own issues on a pedestal in comparison to the issues women have to deal with in regards to small breasts. No one issue trumps another. We all have our reasons for why we hurt, why should one person claim theirs is more important. It sucks having a small dick, for anyone who has one knows full out. But there are worse things in life. It's this mentality that will help get us past our issue. But we have to make an effort. We can't let stupid jokes or the media brainwash us into thinking we are incompetent as men. If we do then that is truly sad, no one should be able to convince us who we are but ourselves.

I wish everyone happiness.

Joe.

[thouroghlyunhappy]

To whoever it was who said something about guys with small dicks only being able to end up with "ugly women," that's offensive. That is the same kind of judgement you claim about women laughing at our misfortune. I'm not trying to be mean or rude by pointing that out, it just struck me that someone who is hurting so bad about his own issue could be so careless in choice of words. I also tend to agree with everything cece posted on this thread. Mostly so about us putting our own issues on a pedestal in comparison to the issues women have to deal with in regards to small breasts. No one issue trumps another. We all have our reasons for why we hurt, why should one person claim theirs is more important. It sucks having a small dick, for anyone who has one knows full out. But there are worse things in life. It's this mentality that will help get us past our issue. But we have to make an effort. We can't let stupid jokes or the media brainwash us into thinking we are incompetent as men. If we do then that is truly sad, no one should be able to convince us who we are but ourselves.

I wish everyone happiness.

Joe.

Welcome Joe, however I'm not happy that your here because the fact that you are probaly means that your hung like a horse-fly (like many of us here), lol.

But anyways, while there are still deluded people amongst us, the majority of us see it for what it is and realize that the best that most of us can hope for are ugly chicks (many of them don't want us either, though) and/or girls with other serious problems (obesity issues, low self-esteem, etc). Of course I'm not putting ugly or heavy girls down, no, their just as important and need love too like everyone else, however the fact of the matter is that there aren't very many "beautiful" women in their right minds whom would settle for us because they can usually do better, hence we're forced to settle for whomever is willing to accept our little-penises, we can't play the field like other normal guys.

And I'd have to say that--while I do sympathize with other people and their problems--ours is usually worse than many of the problems that others try to compare it with. And some of us put our problems "on a pedestal" because our small penises have ruined some of our lives and this is a small penis forum. There ya go.

You made some valid points though, good luck man, glad your trying to work through this. Hope your able to as I'm totally not. Me, I'm rolling the dice and going for the penis surgery. If that fails, well....

P.S To: "tonyala"---- Thanks for your honesty

[Needingsupport]

Thank you for the welcome. I'm not happy that I'm here either! But in another sense I am happy to be here because who better to help you cope than someone who knows your pain. Thank you also for the good luck as I certainly need it in dealing with my issues.

I bet you there are many beautiful women, inside and out, who would accept us for who we are if we could accept ourselves for what we were given and who we are. I know it's a lot easier said than done but confidence plays a crucial role in attracting these women. Getting to know someone before hopping into bed and building a relationship based on trust and communication is our saving grace. There are women who will compromise if we make a real effort and contribute to the relationship emotionally. And of course it's been said already in this thread but there are numerous ways to enjoy a healthy sexual relationship with a woman that doesn't involve having a large dick or even an average one.

Is it possible that we think that this problem is usually worse than other peoples problems because it's "our" problem and not theirs? We have no way of knowing that another person isn't just as defeated about what they're going through as we are. I admit that this is a sickeningly unfair and unjust issue to have to deal with but in my eyes it doesn't mean it's worse than anything anyone else has to go through. There are some of us who have accepted it as fact and have moved on, not to let it bother them one bit. So that proves it can be overcome just like any other issue. It's all in how you view it. Now I'm not saying I'm completely at peace with what I've been dealt, but I'm trying, adamantly. The worst thing we can do is give up. I did, numerous times, which left me with addictions that I now have to come to terms with and accept that they were once a part of my life. I don't know how to forgive myself yet but that's something else I'm working on.

I wish you the best of luck with your surgery should you go through with it. I hope it gets you what you want and can help break the hold this reality has held you under. Have you attempted therapy? I ask because I made an appointment wih my doctor to get a referral to a therapist to aid me in my battle. Just curious to know if you've tried this and if so was it any help at all?

Take care,

Joe.

[Bestcobra]

Welcome Joe, however I'm not happy that your here because the fact that you are probaly means that your hung like a horse-fly (like many of us here), lol.

But anyways, while there are still deluded people amongst us, the majority of us see it for what it is and realize that the best that most of us can hope for are ugly chicks (many of them don't want us either, though) and/or girls with other serious problems (obesity issues, low self-esteem, etc). Of course I'm not putting ugly or heavy girls down, no, their just as important and need love too like everyone else, however the fact of the matter is that there aren't very many "beautiful" women in their right minds whom would settle for us because they can usually do better, hence we're forced to settle for whomever is willing to accept our little-penises, we can't play the field like other normal guys.

And I'd have to say that--while I do sympathize with other people and their problems--ours is usually worse than many of the problems that others try to compare it with. And some of us put our problems "on a pedestal" because our small penises have ruined some of our lives and this is a small penis forum. There ya go.

You made some valid points though, good luck man, glad your trying to work through this. Hope your able to as I'm totally not. Me, I'm rolling the dice and going for the penis surgery. If that fails, well....

P.S To: "tonyala"---- Thanks for your honesty

Thorough I know I started this post and yes I'm severely depressed for a lot of reasons. But I can't agree with you saying that we only end up with "ugly" women. Honestly I don't see anyone as "ugly" in my eyes unless they're someone who actually abuses other people physically or mentally, or purposely harms people in some way no matter what it is. Those people, I see as ugly. When I was 19 I dated a woman that was 34 with 2 grown kids, she didn't want me she wanted someone else that was 2 years older than me. When I was 21 I dated someone that was 43, she was married had 2 kids and was taller and she was overweight by a pretty good bit. I never saw either of these as ugly even if they were what most of society deems as "not physically attractive" They was bother attractive in my eyes, physically as well as mentally. The one that was still married was depressed, and said she would divorce her husband if I would be with her. And because of the way I am she seemed to like me so I was stupid enough to start to fall for her, but when she finally told me I wasn't good enough for her I snapped out of my stupidity and realized I was about to break up a family, and as she told me I wasn't good enough for her I was the one that still had to break up with her cause she would have rather been with someone she found to be less than good enough for her and she could've been happier than being with her own family that she already had, or at least she thinks she could have been.

My point is, please don't call someone ugly if you don't even know them. That's honestly a very shallow opinion especially coming from someone like us. If you seriously consider yourself to have a small dick and can still call others ugly then that seems to me that it's getting to be more of a rage problem than a depressed problem. Which actually a lot of men with smaller than average penises do end up with horrible rage issues, most men in the position we are in either end up severely depressed, have uncontrollable rage problems or they get married at a young age and can eventually be happy for the most part.

Also, a woman having self-esteem issues is not something that makes her ugly in my eyes. You know what self-esteem tells me? That the woman has most likely been through more shit than most people have, or is just more emotional so to ME I would rather talk or possibly date those woman than others because I know I treat people with a great amount of respect and I try to show them how good they can truly be treated. And obesity issues, I don't think people realize a lot of times that it's something that could have also formed from depression at first and if possibly, just one person shows them that they're worth something and dates them and tries to help them lose the weight they would probably be more than glad to at least try to lose the weight with the help of someone that actually cares. If you can't be with someone because they're "fat" or "ugly" or have self-esteem issues then honestly you're sort of taking a lot of the people out of the equation that would possibly want to be with you, just for the way you are.

Also, I don't "Settle" for anyone that I date. I date them because I want to be with them exactly the way they are, if I didn't then I wouldn't date them. I have never and will never ask anyone to change for me, if someone wants to change then I'll help them anyway I can yes but I'm not someone that's going to try to change people to fit some image I have in my head of what the perfect person is. Each person is different and there's only one of everyone, so being with them exactly the way they are is what makes it exciting and worthwhile even if it turns out bad. If everyone in the world was what society sees as "beautiful" then everyone in the world would look the same, we would all think the same, dress the same think the same and do all the same things. It would be an extremely boring world.

[thouroghlyunhappy]

***Best cobra--I agree with much of your post. Sometimes I sound a little harsh because I tend to give it raw and avoid being p.c. But anyways, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I'm entitled to my opinon as much as you are to yours. This isn't a "rage" issue, it's one of those unfair facts of life. Here in the real world, some traits are considered physically attractive by most people and some aren't. Yes, it's shallow--and I try not to be--however it's simply how the world operates. Sure, my penis is small but I'm not blind and am wired like most other men. I didn't make the rules dude. And guy's with small penises aren't in very high demand amongst sane, modern, pretty women, hence the fact that some of us are forced to settle. And, again, I have absolutely nothing against physically unattractive girls--in fact, I'm currently trying to hook up with one whom I met on Craigslist, lol. I've been chatting with this chick on-line for several weeks and just recently we've progressed to chatting on the telephone...and soon we'll be meeting somewhere in public. Sure, she seems nice, her personality is "pretty", but she wouldn't win any beauty pageants, lol, that's for sure. So, do I like her? Yes. Is she physically attractive? No, not at all. Why lie? Under normal circumstances I'd be "out of her league" (ever heard that expression?) But, anyways, I don't consider unattractive people inferior or anything---I don't fault people for things that they have no control over. However,I'm settling, and the reason that I say that I'm "settling" is because I wouldn't be talking to this girl if I had a penis. No, I'd probaly be with one of the many hotties whom have pursued me during the course of my life. Hate to toot my own horn bro--and this is probaly the only time anyone will ever hear me say anything positive about myself--but I'm kinda buff (and am getting bigger) and I look good bro, lol, or at least that's what the ladies have always told me. Sure, I might be an a-hole--or any number of bad things--but I look good and would un-doubtedly be playing the field and/or with a beautiful, shallow woman (the kind that I happen to like) if I weren't cursed with this small problem. Yeah, the fact that I look good and women continue to flirt and hit on me to this day makes me suffer even more, it's like dangling food in front of starving person with no mouth, lol.

But hey, if you feel like you can play the field and that your small penis doesn't limit your choice of women in any way, then by all means--Go on with yo bad self!! I'm not trying to be a player hater! lol. Me (and some others) have to settle though because we can't pull the kind of women that we want with our small penises.

***Needing support: Yeah, I agree that confidence goes a long way. I mean, it's like this: An out-going, confident, funny guy whom has a great personality and is totally open and unashamed about his small penis is waaay more likely to get action than those of us whom are all depressed and messed up.

And as for whether or not our problem is any worse than others--this issue has been visited and debated several times, so I'm not trying to get it rolling again, lol, but I will explain my position. The reason that I ( and a couple of others) say that our problem is more serious is because having a small penis can--in some cases--take you totally out the game. For example, having a big-nose, depression, being physically unattractive, having small boobs, missing a couple of fingers, etc, can be easily over-come with a little acceptance or--in extreme cases--therapy. People with these problems most usually mature and move on to have perfectly normal lives, they turn out okay--- whereas many (but not all) of us with abnormally small penises spend the rest of our lives alone and miserable or in one unsuccessful relationship after the other. Dude, depending on how small you are and your luck, this penis deal is serious stuff. There's men in their 40's-50's-60's whom--due to their abnormally small penises--have never had a real girlfriend! Lol, If this isn't devastating then I don't know what is. Small boobs or being depressed over something that can be changed is small potatoes in comparison. Yeah, whats worse (aside from being blind,etc) than being unable to have successful sexual relations and being repeatedly rejected because of it (and all of the crap that goes with it)? Not only this, but some of us get the whole enchilada when it comes to the problems that can stem from this--no/low self-esteem/self confidence, being a social out-cast (the weird guy whom never has a girl friend), loneliness, repeated humiliation (what hurts more than being laughed at, rejected, and//or gossiped about because your hung like a 10 year old?), failed sexual encounters, etc etc. And, in the worst cases, some are almost totally unable to function in society--at all. I mean, like myself ( and at least one other forum member) for example--- simply seeing women and couples and families in the grocery store or encountering an old friend out with his girl and children--and knowing that I may never have any of it--is sometimes enough to trigger a severe bout of depression or suicidal thoughts, lol. Yeah, this is pretty serious.

And yeah I've been to therapy and have been on both celexa and wellbuterin and am an experienced meditator as well (which is really helpful) however, at the end of the day, the root problem--my small penis--didn't get any bigger, lol. Yeah, some people are able to bring themselves to accept this problem and make the best of it, but I'm one of those people whom has had a particularly hard time with it because I actually want a life--and the kind of life that I want (a normal one) can't be had with a small penis. I too self-medicated for a number of years and became an addict and this is my first time trying to face this issue head-on while sober, and--as perhaps you already know?--problems hurt more when your not high, know what I mean? So, anyways, I've given up on trying to accept it--at least for now--and am pinning my hopes on the surgery. And if the surgery fails then I'll try the acceptance deal again. In the meantime I'm just trying to cope. Good luck with your therapy though--to be sure, some guys learn to accept it and seem to improve and maybe you''ll be one of the lucky ones.

[Thermonuclear Warrior]

See, I can't sympathize with you. You have good looks and you have the girls coming at you, but you lack the balls to deal with the potential 'humiliation' A real man, should play the field and deal with the so called 'consequences' of having a small penis. Manhood isn't based on inches, but rather willingness and ability to function as a man. Personally, I've been told I was small and I've also been told that I was normal. I'm on the very low end of average at 5 x 4.75, so it's likely that a very large population of people will consider me small and a very large population will consider me normal. You are also in this same range as me, but you have women supposedly flocking to you. Why can't you just play the field and take the potential comments like a man? Notdoneyet is the only one on these boards that plays the field without worrying about the consequences. Being unable to please a woman with your dick is quite possibly one of the most trivial things to be upset about. Life could be far worse for you and you continue to place this problem on pedestal, yet this 'problem' does not deserve to be int he league you describe it as. You blame your misery on your penis, but it's inr reality your brain that's to blame. You've placed so much emphasis on previous experiences and comments that you've given up on trying even. If these women are throwing themselves at you, the least you could do is try again. If you continuously get rejected or mocked, then it's likely that the girls you are approaching are of the size queen variety. If you truly desire a shallow relationship with a shallow individual that would only accept a 6x5-7 x 5.5 penis for sex, then go for surgery. However, I personally believe that you have the potential to be with someone that would accept you as you are, especially considering the fact that you are larger than most of the people on this board. You fall into the average length, and I'm not sure about your girth measurements, but you certainly fall into the normal range. Unfortunately for you, your past experiences put a major dent in your brain and you gave up. There are members on this board that will truly have difficulties finding women and your posts are shallow and offensive as fuck. Several of the posters here would kill to be in the normal range. I personally stopped asking for sympathy when I realized how incredibly trivial my penis is in the grand scheme of things, especiailly in my case it's fully functional and of normal length and girth.

Also, tonyala, that was an awesome post.

[thouroghlyunhappy]

Thermonuclear Warrior:

While you made several valid points, it's like this: If my sexual encounters with the four teenie boppers, my ex-girl friend, the chick whom wanted me until she seen my small penis hanging out of my boxers while I was asleep at her brother's house, and the numerous (many, many, many) prostitutes (of all ages, sizes, and races) whom I befriended and bedded during active addiction all agree that my penis is too small to satisfy,well, this might indicate that my problem is real (unless, of course, all of these women are involved in a grand conspiracy to convince me that my penis is small and thereby ruin my life), and I must admit that their opinions (as females) outweigh yours by far because your not a chick and I havn't slept with you. Simply put, my girth is what's killing me (and girth is what's most important, right?) . And I'll be getting another good dose of reality soon as I'm almost positive that this craigslist chick that I've been talking to is gonna give it up, lol, and I'm going for it. She already knows that I'm small and, fortunately, lives a good distance from me (in the town next to mine), so if it's an epic fail the shame factor should be minimal.

But anyways, read this very carefully, okay? :THERE.IS.NO.FRICTiON.WHEN.I.HAVE.VAGINAL.INTERCOURSE. DUE.TO.MY.PENIS.BEING.SKINNY <---this fact makes it a physical problem, and then the mental problems stem from it. What part of this don't you understand? Me and some of the smaller guys will physically have the same experience (lack of friction, no feeling) when we have vaginal intercourse with a woman--if neither partner (the male and female) feels anything at all, then there's a problem---sex becomes useless. Would you not agree? While I don't know how much action you've had, I've had enough to know that if there's no friction then there's no sex because you can't get off, because you don't feel anything (at all), and you lose your erection, and the girl eventually calls you a pencil dick ...and then she tells her friends..and, well...your branded as the "little dick" guy. Man, this stuff isn't so "trivial" to me as it affects my ability to find a desirable mate and have a satisfying sexual relationship.

I have almost a 100% fail rate when it comes to vaginal intercourse. As common sense would suggest, I wouldn't be here if it were any different. The only girl with whom I was ever able to occasionally get my rocks off was my ex-girlfriend---however, probaly 8 out of every 10 of our sexual encounters ended in failure and her rubbing my back saying "it's okay baby", lol.

But anyways, my refusing to play the field right now serves a purpose. See, I have a plan. If my surgery goes right (big IF), I can enter the game with a fresh start without the ladies already knowing that I have a pencil penis. Yeah, I don't wanna mess up my sexual rep before the surgery. HOWEVER, if the surgery fails, then I'm shamelessly going in kamikazi style ----pencil-penis and all--- and letting the chips fall where-ever they may---for sure. If this happens, it should be interesting and I'll keep you guys posted, lol.

Btw, If I had your penis then I probaly wouldn't be here. Sure, your still in the bottom ranks of normal but your girth--unlike mine-- would enable you to actually feel something during sex. So, I can turn this around and say that I can't sympathize with you because you are indeed "normal". (seriously dude, even though your on the smaller side, you should be out living life). Your problem is your brain, but this isn't the case with mine, unfortunately. No, mine's physical. My girth isn't much more than 4", you've got me beat significantly. Yes, just a half inch or so of girth makes a huge difference (believe me).

And even if my problem were all in my head--which it isn't-- then I'm in exactly the right place. This is a "small penis syndrome forum" and according to "About.com sexuality: "The term small penis syndrome has been proposed to describe men who have excessive anxiety about the size of their penis and who have a clinically average sized penis. Individuals who have been diagnosed with a micropenis would not be considered to have small penis syndrome." But, of course, I welcome all my bros with small penis issues, sps or not.

And life itself can be "shallow and offensive", depending on the perspective. And who knows, perhaps I am shallow, but that's life, doesn't make me any less than anyone else--it's the ying/yang thing bro, can't have depth without shallowness. I don't understand how my posts are "offensive" though.

Lastly, lets just agree to disagree, okay? Your entitled to your feelings and beliefs and so am I. I'm not going to debate the validity of my penis issues any longer, lol, this is ridicolous and counter-productive. Unfortunately, I'm a member of this club whether you agree or not. Irregardless of the differences in our smallness, we're all suffering from issues that stem from the size of our penises. I'm not the first to come in here and complain, whine, and hate life, and I probaly won't be the last. Believe what you want and --in regards to my situation---I'll continue to believe the women whom I've actually slept with. Since you seem to handle this so well (much better than myself), perhaps it's time for you to take this thing to the next level and start playing the field like other normal men.

Peace.

[thouroghlyunhappy]

On another note---Guys. I just watched the "Howard Stern Smallest Penis Contest Full Video", with the winners going on a trip to mexico with porn-stars and all the contestants being treated to a "special party" at "Scores" with Howard Stern, lol. But anyways, the point of my telling you about this video (if you havn't seen it already), is that it's strangely empowering ( at least for me, in a weird way, I guess) to see guys with micro-penis shamelessly go on the Howard Stern show and flaunt their stuff. Heck, the first dude looked like he had a vagina and yet gave a shout out to his "girl-friend of 8 years"!. Lol, we need to be more like some of those guys. It's becoming pretty clear to me that being absolutely shameless and simply not giving a **** is the way to go---and this is exactly what I'm gonna do if there's not much improvement with the surgery--I'm tired of suffering, I can't go on like this. I believe that any shame that we may encounter during the process of finding a mate can't hurt much more than living without women altogether, know what I mean? Yeah, I'm going all-in kamikaze style!. We'll all be dead in 100 years, so I guess--in the grand scheme of things--it really doesn't matter. Sure, we can't be the studs that we'd like to be, but if we rol the dice enough times, most of us will find someone worth having, maybe.

Peace.

[Thermonuclear Warrior]

That's better... You already have seen rejection and mockery, it can't get any worse than that. If you play the field, and someone says something shitty, at least it won't be of any surprise. Hopefully you will find someone that doesn't, but if you are just trying to play the field, then you will definitely just have to get used to it. HOWEVER, do not let yourself get weak from any negative comments about your penis. Laugh it off TO THEIR FACES and dominate the hell out of them instead of letting them dominate you. I have seen that video myself, and 2/3 of those micropenis guys seemed very happy with themselves. That's inspiration right there. We are all entitled t happiness, and in our case, that happiness does not involve being a porn star. However, be more well rounded and find other things to appreciate in life. Sex is highly trivial and not absolutely necessary for happiness.

Notice though there was one guy there that was just like us, but got rejected while trying to take part in a threesome. The comments he got from howard stern and crew were dead on though. "He's like me", and "He looks normal to me" yet he got rejected by two hot girls. This wouldnt have happened prior to porn and tv cultures.

Honestly, I'm prepared for the scenario in which my size is deemed unsatisfactory by my partner. I won't let it get to me and I will retaliate with words of my own, not necessarily vulgar or offensive either. I feel that you should conisider this outlook seeing as you actually have women flocking at you. I personally don't, so my next obstacle is to figure out shit that I have in common with women. I hate sports, modern tv, modern music, modern cultures etc, so I'm not well rounded in a social sense and finding a female that appreciates extreme metal, physics, and Carl Sagan is unlikely. I may start going to the gym seeing as that's something that most people my age often do.

[thouroghlyunhappy]

That's better... You already have seen rejection and mockery, it can't get any worse than that. If you play the field, and someone says something shitty, at least it won't be of any surprise. Hopefully you will find someone that doesn't, but if you are just trying to play the field, then you will definitely just have to get used to it. HOWEVER, do not let yourself get weak from any negative comments about your penis. Laugh it off TO THEIR FACES and dominate the hell out of them instead of letting them dominate you. I have seen that video myself, and 2/3 of those micropenis guys seemed very happy with themselves. That's inspiration right there. We are all entitled t happiness, and in our case, that happiness does not involve being a porn star. However, be more well rounded and find other things to appreciate in life. Sex is highly trivial and not absolutely necessary for happiness.

Notice though there was one guy there that was just like us, but got rejected while trying to take part in a threesome. The comments he got from howard stern and crew were dead on though. "He's like me", and "He looks normal to me" yet he got rejected by two hot girls. This wouldnt have happened prior to porn and tv cultures.

Honestly, I'm prepared for the scenario in which my size is deemed unsatisfactory by my partner. I won't let it get to me and I will retaliate with words of my own, not necessarily vulgar or offensive either. I feel that you should conisider this outlook seeing as you actually have women flocking at you. I personally don't, so my next obstacle is to figure out shit that I have in common with women. I hate sports, modern tv, modern music, modern cultures etc, so I'm not well rounded in a social sense and finding a female that appreciates extreme metal, physics, and Carl Sagan is unlikely. I may start going to the gym seeing as that's something that most people my age often do.

I totally agree with you on this one except for the " Sex is highly trivial " part, lol.

But anyways, one of my problems is that I too have a problem fitting in (not "well rounded"), or at least that's the case when it comes to living in my area (I live in a military town). Hate to sound harsh, but, much of our modern culture (in my opinion) is mindless stupidity--plain and simple. So, I'm not so sure that your disinterest in the stuff that you mentioned is a bad thing. Sounds like you need to find an open-minded geeky chick. Me, I can relate in some ways, because, while maybe I'm still a bit "shallow" , I've lost interest in many of things that used to amuse me. I mean, I hate rap, hate sports ("watching grown men throw balls through hoops, etc., is stupid to me) , can't stand most of what's on the radio, hate most television (and when I do watch it, it's National Geographic or the occasional "South Park" episode), and I think that most of the people whom I encounter in my area are just plain stupid (the "Honey Boo Boo" and "Kardashians" watching crowd (no offense meant, people)). My area is a mixed middle to lower working class area and alot of the people here seem to believe that owning large car-rims and partying are the ultimate goals in life. Even many of the thirty-somethings behave like this, I don't get it. And then when you consider the fact that I'm an addict and can probaly never drink alcohol again, this further restricts my ability to socialize and hang-out with other adults (i.e, I can't "party" or enjoy social events like others do. Sucks when your the only one sober). But yeah, when I started meditating and actually thinking (instead of blindly operating on auto-pilot ) I sorta evolved into one of those alternative life-style types and would probaly get along a little better in a more alternative life-style friendly area (those places where alot of different/weird people live, like San-Franciso, Chapel-Hill or Asheville, NC, etc.) I'm into meditation, yoga, philosophy, veganism, I'm a health nut, eco-nut (one of those types who recycles everything and would ride a scooter or bicycle to work even if I had a car in the drive way), I actually read books, and don't care so much about money anymore (though it's nice to have, of course) etc, etc. Lol, I've even been flirting with the idea of "freeganism", which would make me even more of a lunatic to just about anybody, lol.(I became inspired when I read "The Moneyless Man: A Year of Freeconomic Living") So, small penis issues aside, these things sorta make me "weird" to the people I live amongst and the old friends that I grew up with because I have absolutely nothing in common with most of them anymore, and most normal chicks (especially the kind that I tend to be attracted to) would probaly think that I'm plain crazy if they only knew what my outlook was, lol. Yeah, I'd probaly need an open-minded hippy chick in order to make a relationship work.

But anyways, though I'm insane, I can tell you this: Get in the gym and hit those weights hard! Get buff and the chicks will sweat you, even if your ugly. And, strangely, it seems to make other men treat you differently as well. My physique came mostly from pumping Iron while serving a lengthy prison sentence (and was largely for survival purposes because some inmates are more likely to try to take advantage of a skinny out of shape white guy), lol, but out here in the free-world it's much easier because of the better accessibility to supplements and equipment. One thing about it though---having a built body, I believe, makes women assume that maybe your also packing below the belt, which could lead to even harsher criticism from the ladies if you build their hopes up and then reveal your small package, lol..it's sorta like a bigger let-down for them or something.

Peace.

P.S--As for that "Howard Stern small penis contest" video that I reccommended---I don't know which version you watched (there's a 9 minute clip and then the full-length version), everyone should watch the hour-long full length episode (uncut, available on several porn sites), it's inspiring. Most of the guys are hung like 10 year olds and some have nothing at all, and--with the exception of maybe 2 of them--they all seem to be perfectly normal, out-going guys--Kinda inspiring, especially the fat dude that sings the song, lol. Wish i could be as open and accepting of it as these guys seem to be.

[Jessie]

inspiring up to a point- but I don't know if I could ever shrug off a direct insult from a girl.

I have only had sex with 5 girls and I selected them very carefully as being nice, caring people.

Even though Im 99% sure my size caused the break up of all 5 relationships they never once mocked by size- a couple made poor phrased comments maybe but nothing overtly cruel.

And that thought alone haunts me every day, even though they let me gently on the whole (apart from perhaps the 5th, which was abrupt)

If a girl mocked me to my face I honestly think I would kill myself and I dont think anyone or anything could stop me.

[Thermonuclear Warrior]

If a girl mocked me to my face now or in the near future, I wouldn't give one shit. There is nothing that can be done about this and killing ones self over a matter of inches of meat is quite possibly the most cowardly route one can go. Learn to take criticism like a man, and be empowered. You have a small penis, but you are still a man and you are entitled to happiness just as anyone else. Do you physically enjoy having sex, does it feel good for you? If so, consider doing whatever is necessary for your partner to feel the same way with or without your penis. Not everyone can pleasure their partners with their penises alone. Sure, in an ideal situation, a man will be endowed and be caring and highly interested in doing whatever is necessary to please his partner. However in many cases, endowed men are less likely to 'go the extra' mile due to their superiority complex.

Life isn't ideal at all. I've noticed my well endowed friends having excellent sex lives, but failing in many other ways in life. I wouldn't trade with them if you paid me. We all have strengths and weaknesses and in your case, your penis isn't one of them. Focus on your strengths and don't let this bit of meat be your weakness. We, the small penis people, need to stop being weak and we need to stand up for ourselves and be in power. I am glad women are empowered these days, but this bullshit we deal with is unacceptable. I bet 50 years ago or more, this was completely unheard of. If you wanted sex or marriage, you got it regardless of your penis size. For starters, I'd suggest breaking the ice immediately before you even consider getting intimate. Mention that you have a small penis before you even consider exposing yourself. I feel that in that situation, you are more in control and less vulnerable. Do not even THINK about suicide over this when you could overcome it with time.

And what I like about that video are the comments regarding the normal/low average/average guys Most people that have SPS are exactly like those guys and in that video you can hear several positive comments from the judges. "He looks normal to me, he's not that bad, etc." There were a few guys there that are truly small though, and despite the fact, they had girlfriends and were seemingly happy individuals, and not suicidal.

[Jessie]

Im afraid for me one of the major aspects of sex that I enjoyed was the thought that "omg- she's actually accepting and enjoying my penis"

in fact it was likely the most important aspect- thats now gone for me-so I doubt I will ever enjoy sex again anyway, even if I get the opportunity to have it.

If I am honest I did feel my partners were too loose due my size and I can only do certain positions to avoid slipping out, which really upset me- but I hid my feelings from my partners- its not like they can do anything much about the issue.

I was so hoping they were enjoying themselves I guess my positivity blinded me to the reality and so when they left me, the ugly truth devastated me.

I suppose theoretically I could enjoy a blow job but then they have to get close to my excuse of a manhood- and I think that shame would erode any physical enjoyment in the future.

I know life is unfair and cruel- I know people are born with no legs or get hurt in wars etc- I do try to be brave- I put on a good outward show- I guess the rejection has eaten away so much of me I'm too far gone.

I always was an over sensitive sod though... ladies... please form an orderly queue....

[thouroghlyunhappy]

I think the bottom line is this: If we're ever going to over-come this thing and find partners---we're simply gonna have to learn to be shameless, thats it--there's no other way. Nothing can hurt you if you don't really give a f___. Easier said than done, of course, but when you consider the fact that life's extremely short and we're all gonna die sometime within this century, alot of our worries are stupid because we really don't have anything to lose. Any shame or rejection that we may encounter over this issue will mean nothing in the grave, know what I mean? I don't even understand how I allowed myself to get so down over this. Sure, this small-penis deal sucks and limits our ability to have exactly what we want, but our entire world exists in our heads--and, through training, thats one thing that we can learn to control (i.e, our minds).

This reminds of a story (can't remember if I read it here or not):

A dude gets a chick in a hotel room for sex and takes off his clothes.

The chick says to him: "Who are you gonna satisfy with that little thing?"

The dude looks her in the eye and replies, "Me!"

lol

[Jessie]

sigh.... like I say....

ladies... form an orderly queue...

[Thermonuclear Warrior]

^I don't understand what you are saying. Are you asking for women to chime in? Or are you waiting for women to line up for you? I don't get the metaphor.

[Jessie]

its a british joke,

I'm making the ludicrous claim that our inadequate privates will cause hordes of women to lust after us, and therefore to avoid any crushing they had better form an orderly line.

and furthermore that making 'no attempt to please them' will make the line longer....

[Thermonuclear Warrior]

Hah, now I feel like a stereotypical American for not understanding British humor. Your situation seems pretty ideal to me haha.

[Jessie]

yeah well, my sense of humour has gotten me into a few relationships over the years.

And I have loyal friends who share my sense of comedy.

But to quote another british comic "you cant fuck a good sense of humour"...

alas the bedroom requires more than a few well delivered witticisms.

[Bestcobra]

Skynight that comment about it not being a responsibility to please a woman during sex was pretty bad in my opinion...you realize the reason that the sex is most likely happening is because she would want to please the man right? It's not her responsibility either, if she doesn't want to she wouldn't have to do a damn thing. There's no written rule that says to be in a relationship a woman has to satisfy a man sexually, nor the other way around. I've just come to the conclusion that if someone can't be happy with the way I am it's really not my problem, I was born this way and nobody should have to change themselves just because of one flaw, and I know I can satisfy women sexually anyway, just not with my penis. So I just most likely won't be having sex all that often but that doesn't bother me, I have too many other things in my life that causes me to be depressed and I can't keep having this extra thing making it worse. Maybe I'll never end up with anyone else and maybe I will, but I'll do my best with what I have and that's all I can do. Hopefully more of you can do the same and just not let it get you down too much but I just can't personally let it do it to me anymore or I'll end up on the news one day, and it won't be for a good reason.

[Jessie]

Kinda agree- I think women often expect men who are small to try harder in bed (and in the relationship) to make up for it.

So if you do find that rare girl who can overlook the inadequacy, why on earth jeopardise that by being lazy and selfish sexually?

[thouroghlyunhappy]

No I don't agree that every women wants to please a man. Some women are just in it for their own self-gratification just like some men are. I guess the thing is, whenever you hear about sex discussions on the Internet or magazines, it's always about the man having to pleasure the women. Like women have a sense of entitlement. I think the problem with some men with small penis is that they emphasise to much on wanting to please the women that they actually forget that sex is supposed to be about them also. About their pleasure and about sex feeling good for them. I don't have a small penis, I don't have a huge penis either mind you, so maybe hardly the best to comment on this. I sometimes think though that ego get's in the way of things. I'm sure most men have a fantasy of wanting to pound a women with a giant cock but it's all ego. If you stress to much on sex being about making a woman feel satisfied you actually forget what sex really is about. Procreation and you own pleasure first. Put yourself first and you will not care so much about the size of your penis or any other body part you may feel insecure about. If she isn't satisfied, well as long as you were that's the main thing. Also that attitude may get you more women, you may feel more confident because you won't care, and the interesting thing is, you're feel more relaxed during sex and will likely please a woman. But if you don't, So what. It's not the end of the world. It's sex, that's all it is.

Skynight, you hit the nail on the head!