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My name is Olivia, and this is who I am.


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So, I'm not a new member, as I guess most of you know, but today is one of those 'fresh start' days for me. Things are going to be hard, they always have been, 'getting better' is not easy, but with a new attitude, as a 'new' Olivia, I'm hoping to make some progress. I am Olivia, and I'm going to tell you about me.

First, I suppose, new members would start with why they are here, and I am here because I am mentally unwell, but that is not who I am, my problems do not define me. I will keep this short, for the point of my post, but feel free to ask questions:

- I have self harmed for nearly 6 years.

- I suffer with apparent 'severe depression'.

- I am often suicidal.

- I have, though undiagnosed, what my therapist says is an eating disorder.

- I have had auditory hallucinations for a while, and since about four weeks ago, I have been hearing voices, which is a new and unpleasant experience for me.

- I am an anxious person, though this has never been a key issue.

- I am a fairly paranoid person, but I feel this only stems from anxiety.

- I LOATHE myself.

Pretty normal stuff, really. I have a therapist, a psychiatrist, I take medication. All pretty boring, right?

Who I AM is Olivia, I am 16 years old and I am a vegetarian. I love animals, often more than humans, and I have two pet guinea pigs called Caramel and Cream. I don't like sports other than horseriding, though I haven't ridden for quite a while. I have taken part in many show jumping competitions and dressage events.

I have purple hair, which is my favourite colour. I have blue eyes and I wear glasses. I am extremely pale and people often ask if I am anemic, so now someone has arranged a blood test for me, and I find that funny. I often dress in black and purple. I own a LOT of jackets and shoes.

I am in college studying Chemistry, Biology, Psychology and English Literature. I plan to study medicine at university, and become a psychiatrist (though I often lose sight of my goals).

I like to draw on occasion, I write poetry too, as a way to release feelings.

I live with my aunt and her partner, with four of my cousins. My aunt and I are the only females in the house, so it's often a bit stressful ;) One of my cousins has 'severe' autism, but I love him very much, I spend a lot of time with him as he seems to quite enjoy my company.

I have a 'boyfriend' whom I have been with for 1 year 8 months. Not much to say about him, really.

I don't know. I don't know if any of that really tells you who I am. I am Olivia, I am me.

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Hello, Olivia. :) Nice to meet you. I'm Beth.

'Fresh start' days can be wonderful. I agree that our challenges don't define us. It's great that you are feeling a positive attitude. Good for you. :)

Caramel and Cream? How cute! :)

I also enjoy writing poetry and my daughter likes to draw. It's good to have ways to express ourselves. I think we all need that.

I hope you have a good day. We are here to support you. Wishing you well.

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Hi Olivia,

Nice to meet you! I have a lot in common with you. Not the purple hair, but if I was 16 now I'd definately have cobalt blue hair.

I have some of the mental stuff in common though.

I have a friend who is in med school and she has more mental health diagnoses and addictions than I do, including bipolar and dissociative disorder...she's brilliant and she is going to be a psychiatrist. I am proud of her and brag about her for any reason whatsoever.

Do you like rats? I love them.

Keep expressing yourself!

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