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Periods of excessive anger?


Kitkat1993x

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I get angry CONSTANTLY at the moment. Over every little thing and I store it up and store it up and explode at my parents and friends. Does anyone else get this? I'm really really scared I'll be violent and physically hurt someone.

I used to have problems with anger during my nervous breakdown and I was violent and I used to trash the house and kick and abuse my parents and now I'm just verbally abusive and I hate it and I don't mean to be and I'm scared. :(

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Hi just been reading your topics and i feel so sad for you but you are not alone i have biopolar just been diangnosed iv been sectioned by the police due too concern of my mental health and they wouldnt help me either even though iv tried several times too comit suicide just never suceeded as one thing kept drifting in and out of my mind which was my 3 lovely children. Im 26 and have 3 kids but none of them live wiv me due too my dad passed away last year he was 44 and an alcoholic so i had a nervous breakdown and my children got taken into care so the only way i seemed too get through my days was too drink heavily then put my life at risk :(....now im on the right meds and see a phsychiatrist im sort of feeling on the rite path now and deeply regret and hate myself for even consemplating the idea of suicide. I also have spare of the moments where i get so angry and just flip out but im spending most of my time reading writing poems too like you and on websites like this talking too strangers feel so much better you dont get judged. I f you ever want too talk when your at a low im normally on here at night so message me. Take Care and please stay safe you only get 1 shot in life try too stay positive xx.

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Hi KitKat. Yes, I can relate to the anger you're describing. I've never been physically violent to anyone, ever, but when I'm angry, I feel like I want to harm everyone around me, including myself. What I'm slowly coming to realize is that the anger is a defense mechanism. It "protects" me -- thinking about tearing everyone else, or myself, apart, so that I don't have to cope with the emotional pain I feel.

It's scary, I know. When I'm angry, I hear myself say things I can't ever imagine I would say. I hurt people I can't ever imagine I'd want to hurt. Afterwards, I hate myself more than ever.

I'm not sure I have any advice, except to reach out and get some support. Friends, family, professional -- preferably, all of the above. I know how hard that is, believe me, but I really think it's the only answer. Please take care of yourself.

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I can relate. The first time I was arrested was purely becuase of my anger. I had 3 police officers fighting me to get me down, throwing punches at me, I cussed back at them, one punched my jaw and I laughed in his face, called it a pussy punch, and that I'd kill him. I was so angry and drunk I didnt even feel anything.... I was raging so bad they pepper sprayed me 3- 6 times I dont know but I burnt....later that night I was still pissing on them, and 6 of them beat me to crap, kicking me on the gound, but I still didnt stop, I was till calling them out and swearing. That had to take me to the hospital and tie me down because I was still raging at them, all beat up and pepper sprayed to hell, could barely god damn breath was sufficating from being sprayed repetedly, but I so infuriated I kept going. I spit in the doctors face becuase I felt he was being a dick to me, and he kind of was, I remember the cop standing over me right then..and started staring in his eyes just to piss him off more, starred him down till he looked away and laughed. I remeber being hancuffed a dragged along the hospital hallway, with everyone looking at me like I was a the god damn devil, so a started shouting at some of them too.

This whole night just made me more pissed in general. Having other people, of my own society and culture looking at me and treating me like I was nothing but dirt,, even tho I was asking for it, l really felt like the world was caving in on me..They all wanted me to die, I could see it in their faces, which was really a morbid sort of feeling.

But thats where, when you truly act out on pure anger, thats pretty much as far as you can take it. I could have died that night. People will just straight up turn against you when you're that angry. The will continue to shut you down with whatever methods are available to them, and if you don't stop, eventually, they will literally kill you unless your willing and capable of killing them first.. Even if you keep your anger within the social realm, not completely into anti socialness like I was that night, people will shut you down for it. They won't listen to you, you wll be ignored and shunned. But when you are truly angry, you don't care about that..

I happen to be in a good mood but Im still angry in general. My shitty job, my shitty life, I could go on but I'll save that for my ventstation.

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I can also relate. Mine hasn't been as bad the others above have mentioned, but it can still be very intense and feel kinda "numb" after it's passed. It's half the reason I used to self harm; I would hurt myself so I wouldn't hurt others.

Hell, even now I still fly into rages after repressing a lot of stuff for a while(don't try to but it's a reflex from years of being conditioned to only express "good" emotions and be punished or invalidated if I express anything "bad"), but it's thankfully not intense enough to want go back to hurting myself.

I'm just coming back from a rage I had last night over my frustration of only getting bullshit jobs that give me so much stress when I have a degree that I worked my ass off for and playing the fucking game of "job politics"(obsessing over wearing the right "business" clothes, agonizing over to say/not say, presenting a fake "ideal personality" etc.); only for that to still not be enough. Now that I've let it out, I feel so much better. Still jaded and bitter as hell, but better.

I used to see anger as being "bad" because of soicety's conditioning and I think because of that it's some of us here have some kind of anger issue; we weren't allowed the right to express our anger and now it's coming back up after years of repression. Anger is natural just like any other emotion that needs to be expressed and I've learned to make a "vent time" for myself; I find a place where I know I won't be heard and let it all out: yelling, cursing, screaming etc. Then begin the cycle all over again: Get pissed off. See how long I can keep it in. Find a place to "explode" without anyone giving me grief about it.

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