Reason I why I haven't given up.

[dvnJ22]

Here are my reasons, in no order (feel free to post yours)

1. I want to see my 11 year old sister grow up. I think she is possible of great things -- In my mind she could be the next Amelia Earhart or something, and I don't just say that because I'm her brother, but because she is amazingly compassionate and smart.

2. My older sister -- she and I are like twins, and she has depression - If I were to give up and commit suicide she would be devastated.

3. I don't wanna sound preachy or crazy, but God. Even though I have doubts, my prayers have been answered many times. I mostly doubt the afterlife more then anything. To me it doesn't make too much sense. However a God who is loving and does guides us in he's own way makes sense. I liked this quote by Gandhi:

" God is that indefinable something which we all feel but which we do not know. To me God is Truth and Love, God is ethics and morality. God is fearlessness, God is the source of light and life and yet. He is above and beyond all these. God is conscience. He is even the atheism of the atheist. He transcends speech and reason. He is a personal God to those who need His touch. He is purest essence. He simply Is to those who have faith. He is long suffering. He is patient but He is also terrible. He is the greatest democrat the world knows. He is the greatest tyrant ever known. We are not, He alone Is"

[Recluse]

I haven't given up for a few reasons:

1. It would not be fair to my parents and step parents to outlive me.

2. I am agnostic and it would not be worth taking the risk of ending it.

3. I have some things I want to pursue throughout my life that are meaningful.