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What started your SPS?


Mutton
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Was it viewing porn at a young age? (Me)

Locker Room Syndrome?

Viewing friends who were larger?

What started it? I'm just curious, I want to do a study and see what the most popular vote is. I'm assuming probably porn or viewing somebody in the real world who were much bigger than you by coincidence. The average erect male penis is 5.5 inches length, and 4.5 inches circumference. I'm 6.1 inches in length (slightly above average) and 4.5 inches circumference yet I have SPS. I'm bigger than most guys yet I have a strange reason to believe I have a small penis. It's crazy how much society changes males thoughts about their penis, and how inadequate they can make you feel, even when your penis is perfectly fine.

Also: The womans vagina only goes in about 3 inches and expands when necessary to fit any size penis. so as long as you are 3 inches, YOU ARE FINE. If the woman and you LOVE eachother, and her main concern is your penis, SHE ISN'T WORTH IT, you will not spend the rest of your life with her if she thinks that, it just won't work out. That goes for guys treating women wrong aswell, if you're a guy, and you're in a loving relationship with an amazing girl, and you're worried about her tits or ass, you don't deserve her.

If you're just having sex with random people, you need to check your morals anyway. Sex shouldn't be meaningless, it should be with someone who will love you no matter what, if you had 1 inch, or 6 inch, or 12 inch, it shouldn't matter to them, just like how guys shouldn't end a relationship just because they think a girls ass/tits is not attractive enough.

>rant over

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If you're just having sex with random people, you need to check your morals anyway. Sex shouldn't be meaningless, it should be with someone who will love you no matter what, if you had 1 inch, or 6 inch, or 12 inch, it shouldn't matter to them, just like how guys shouldn't end a relationship just because they think a girls ass/tits is not attractive enough.

Hey buddy, the 50s are over, these days it's socially acceptable to have sex only for fun. The only reason why marriage seemed more stable than today is that there was a social stigma associated with divorce, now every we have more and more, seems like people are realizing what a false institution marriage is.

I personally think monogamy and the idea that humans are supposed to choose one person for the rest of their friggin' life is insanely idiotic, it's one of these amazingly bad ideas that was pushed onto us from various religions. It's the main reason people are so sexually fucked up these days, years of repression what is completely natural. We see how good that turned out for christianity, forbidding it's priests to have sexual relationships, perfect foundation for degenerate pedophile circles.

Your so called morally righteous lifestyle of only having sex with someone you love (which is nothing more than a chemical reaction) did some real damage to the human race in general.

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Yeah, I'm afraid that no matter how certain one might be about their own "shoulds", and how natural it may feel that the same "shoulds" apply to everyone, you're going to find a fairly wide variation from person to person as to what they are. Unfortunately, it's quite difficult to prove to others that you're in possession of the only "right" set.

In particular, I can't prove that penis size isn't as important as it seems to some of you. About all I can do is ask about how well that idea, that way of organizing the world, works for you. There are probably guys who are smaller than average to whom it never occurs to doubt themselves, just as there are guys who are average, or thereabouts, who do.

I know you're probably tired of the phrase "it's not the size, it's what you do with it", but I want to suggest that it doesn't just mean "... while you're having sex." "What you do" with your situation is a much larger thing; it's about your worldview, your values, your image of yourselves. Just as there are a lot of different ideas of right and wrong, there are a lot of different ways to approach, say, being insulted. If someone insults you for something you don't think matters, you're going to laugh and assume the problem is with the insulter. On the other hand, if you agree with them that you have some flaw, you're going to be embarrassed and ashamed and hurt that your perceived flaw is exposed, and you're never going to think about what kind of person exposes someone else's flaws for public ridicule.

Bundy, I do have one interesting question for you: if love is nothing more than a chemical reaction, then what is confidence, or the pain of being rejected or ridiculed, or anger even? A brain may be "nothing but" a bag of chemical reactions and electrical activity, but the damn thing sure does feel real ...

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Porn made me feel inadequate. Then when working in the operating room, I saw several lacid penises that were significantly longer than my erect penis However, I also did see average and small as well, but it seemed to be more common for me to encounter larger. This made me believe the statistics were inaccurate, but I only encountered a small sample space.

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Anything from your past, Bundy, that might bring up angry feelings around marriage and monogamous relationships or have you always felt this way? Sometimes anger can be protective and may cover more difficult feelings such as fear and pain. I don't know if any of that fits for you or not.

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well I always kinda of knew I was small, but it never bothered me. I'm a big geek, and never dated, kiss, sex, held hands, nothing, not even at the age of 22 - this more by choice then circumstance btw. So like I said i'm a big geek and religious, so I spend most of my time playing video games, watching documentaries, waiting for the new Game of thrones season, busy in my congregation, stuff like that. but this past year, I really can't remember the exact moment, long story short I found out that the average is 5.5-6 inches. So I got curious and measured, and even though I knew i may fall short.... I didn't know that I was this short of average. which is 3.5 inches.. erect! I am medically normal though.. which is good, but kind of like a fire grows so did insecurities and obsession. And since I have OCD aslo, it makes it really bad.

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Bundy, I do have one interesting question for you: if love is nothing more than a chemical reaction, then what is confidence, or the pain of being rejected or ridiculed, or anger even? A brain may be "nothing but" a bag of chemical reactions and electrical activity, but the damn thing sure does feel real ...

Just to make some things clear, It's not like I'm an academic, so I don't want to insinuate that I'm extraordinarily smart and have full knowledge of neurologic matters. I'm enthusiastic about all fields of science, but obviously I don't posess knowledge of a true expert, I just happen to be friends with some extremely intelligent people and I'm often able to see from where they're coming from and in generally being able to associate myself with their believes. The way I see it, for every well known human reaction there is a clear neurologic reason to why it is that way.

I assume that the most primal feelings like love, anger and sadness all fulfill some kind of primitive need. For example, love is obviously there to highen the sexual drive of a person with manually inducing a hormone rise to make mating more likely, due to creating a conceived feeling of mutual attraction, and thus ensure procreation, if we break it down to it's most basic functionality. Same with anger, I think the reason why we feel anger is that in order to successfully defend ourselves, we're required to insinuate hostility to make clear that we'll strike back, since humans don't have the convinience of peak physical attribute", like animals can with claws and sharp teeth, and words didn't exist from the beginning of mankind..

What I want to say is, all forms of feelings basically exist to make survival more likely, it's only now that we assigned words to these feelings, with gaining a conscience and thus, the ability to analyze and think about each of our actions. Humiliation fits also right there, giving certain males in many species the power to put down other males in a group, so that he can successfully exlude other lesser males and make sure that his genes pass on.

It's only in this age of "enlightenment" and self discovery that all these words gained a more sophisticated meaning to them.

Anything from your past, Bundy, that might bring up angry feelings around marriage and monogamous relationships or have you always felt this way? Sometimes anger can be protective and may cover more difficult feelings such as fear and pain. I don't know if any of that fits for you or not.

Well, it's only really what I got from my observations in my short life. Most married couples I know are constantly miserable and annoying whiners in general.

Heck, I'm not even saying that marriage can't work, but that because we as people have been conditioned to believe it's the 08/15 thing do, as in, you didn't live life the right way if you don't end up with marriage and kids, and that really pisses me off, because there is such a self-righteous ring to it.

I remember when I worked as a clerk, I quickly noticed that most people in the supermarket had relationships with other co-workers, and all these people were noticably miserable. They didn't even like each other that much, you just noticed the reason most of these married people are with each other is beacause they are stuck in deadend loser jobs, and someone more to their liking, smart/intelligent/successful wouldn't give them a second attention, so they decided to settle down with someone from their own social standing, growing more resentful every day because the other party always feels they originally wanted someone better. It's just this whole big, fat lie that looks, size, money and social standing don't matter, that lie we tell us so we don't feel like shallow assholes as a species, but we just are, at least most people are. All these problems spawn from the same cancerous parasite that plagues humanity for centuries, religion, and it's flagship marriage. It's this whole thing of forcing something unnatural onto most people that is responsible that we as a species are this massively fucked up in the 21th century. An accumulation of bad ideas and idiocy in general, stewed over thousands of years, leading to a clinical psychotic reaction.

I couldn't be less convinced of marriage even if I tried.

Edit; yes, games of thrones is pretty fantastic.

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The primary value of marriage is the perpetuation of the species.

Although it doesn't always work well for everybody, it seems viable

for many couples. It offers commitment when there are children produced by the

relationship.

My marriage failed miserably, even though I wasn't aware of it until the deceit

became apparent.

I would never expect others to base their consideration for marriage

on my failure.

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Bundy your right, humanity is messed up. But man, the individual can be good, can be kind, honorable, and everything contrary to the masses. He can not do this perfectly, but if he sets his own ideals, he will be better off. If he does this he will be ridiculed, mabey humiliated, but what's else is there? That's how I look at it sometimes, do I want to be what I think man should be? Or be like what tv tells me what man should be? Shall I choose honor or dishonor?

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Honor is something we have control over. Honor is defined as:

1.

honesty, fairness, or integrity in one's beliefs and actions: a man of honor.

As far as others holding you in honor is a different story, but that doesn't matter much since the most honorable men are the most reviled. Among my friends and family, I'm held in good esteem, but the majority don't like my values, or beliefs. I'm a pacifist, theist, apolitical. In high school I over heard one of the "popular girls" make fun of Jews. I walked up to her and called her a nazi. After that I was left alone pretty much all the time at school. But I stood up to blatant racism. I did the something similar to someone making fun of a midget in a McDonald's. I was only 10 at the time, but it was the right thing to do.

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honesty- but I deceive those around me- none of them know my awful secret

fairness- Im not altogether sure Im being fair to a potential partner. its a hell of compromise to endure.

integrity- well Im an inadequate, unconfident, lonely man who would never admit to a potential partner that my exes were repulsed/unsatisfied by my 'manhood'- that doesnt sound like integrity to me.

But I'm kind and 'mostly' honest. theres honour in that to some degree

Well done for standing up for the guy in Macdonalds tho...

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Integrity is define as:

1.

adherence to moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty.

You do have integrity. If its one thing guy nice unconfident guys like do have it is integrity. Doing the right, love your neighbor as youself type of thing, being peaceful, kind - that is integrity. Integrity is the one thing that can't be taken from anyone, only surrendered.

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First off... You're not deceiving anyone. What is in your pants is no one's business but you, your partner's and your dr.

Secondly, you're not being unfair to any potential partner. They have the freedom of choice.

Third and most important, I seriously doubt any of your exes were repulsed by you. I think even you know that's not true. Unsatisfied? Maybe... but I doubt it was all because of your penis.

Passions die, relationships lose their spark, things get boring. It's never just the sex.

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Integrity is define as:

1.

adherence to moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty.

You do have integrity. If its one thing guy nice unconfident guys like do have it is integrity. Doing the right, love your neighbor as youself type of thing, being peaceful, kind - that is integrity. Integrity is the one thing that can't be taken from anyone, only surrendered.

well Im peaceful and kind- and Im moral, pretty much... I just 'feel' like I have no honour or integrity- I guess I feel like I have a shameful secret.

There is an element of dishonesty with me...

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First off... You're not deceiving anyone. What is in your pants is no one's business but you, your partner's and your dr.

Secondly, you're not being unfair to any potential partner. They have the freedom of choice.

Third and most important, I seriously doubt any of your exes were repulsed by you. I think even you know that's not true. Unsatisfied? Maybe... but I doubt it was all because of your penis.

Passions die, relationships lose their spark, things get boring. It's never just the sex.

-No- i am deceiving people. When women and men have made cruel jokes about small dicks I laughed along- for fear of discovery.

Once a drunk girl asked me straight out 'what i was packing'- I lied to her face. I did the same to a nosy female friend too.

- Freedom of choice. Ultimately yes, but once we are naked together I have put her in a horrid dilemma.

Does she dump the poor guy? thats a guilt trip

or does she put up with bad sex and/or the mental issues that small men have (that you can testify to)

- I don't think they were repulsed by me thats true- I did overstate that.

But my dick was a major turnoff- several admitted it straight out. (I read my last ones secret diary- not so honourable eh?)

I am sure with all 5 of my 'exes' had I been normal none would have left me- Im 99% sure of it.

I only admitted my sense of inadequacy to the last 2 anyhow- I hid it from the other 3.

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Cece- I think in general you are right but with the exception of 2 girls I behaved well.

We hit it off, I was happy and giving, generous- though not suffocating or over keen.

Its just, well despite ones best efforts, its not not easy with a small one- sex wise.

The 4th one was my GF and because of what happened before, I did reveal my insecurities to her and she denied it and denied it and denied it.

But her diary was full of her angst over my size- pages of it- it was the ONLY fault. seriously I put this lovely girl through hell.

Thats what I meant about guilt. She WANTED to overlook it. She wrote she loved me deeply, but the lack of x, y, z was deeply upsetting her.

And she hated I was powerless to help it and hated the pain it caused me.

Well at least I know 2 girls for sure have loved me- I tell myself that every day- perhaps its that knowledge that has kept me going all these years.

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Jessie, you are way too hard on yourself.

Laughing at some bad jokes? Telling some drunk girl you probably had absolutely no intention of taking home that you were packing hardly makes you dishonest. Lol

Freedom of choice works both ways. She chooses to sleep with you and can choose not to sleep with you again. There's really no guilt in that. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. You shouldn't feel guilty either. Not everyone is sexual compatible. Size isn't the only reason for it.

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Well I sure as hell didn't admit the truth.... Surely an honourable man would either refuse to answer or tell the truth?

me? Snivelling lies and lonely tears at bed time....

I think with nice girls there is a guilt dynamic. A one night stand would just kick me out sure.

But a nice girl who sleeps with me on a 5 th date? She then has to tell me it's over the very next day cos she's freaked by my secret? Not an easy phone call. I bet she feels she ' ought' to continue it, cos its not the guys fault right? Right? See the guilt she feels. See the guilt I feel?

I know it's a free country but its not as simple as that. I have less to offer a girl than 99% of guys.

That creates shame and guilt of epic proportions.

Jeez, I read yesterday that even moles think size matters. The universe must be taking the piss out of me now"

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Here's a question: if compassion, integrity, and honor are important to you (and I have no trouble believing that they are important to all of you), do you practice them towards yourselves? If not, why not?

And if you don't feel like you live up to your own standards, inside or outside, what stops you? It's okay, whatever it is; obviously, it's something important, or you would live up to your standards. But if you can identify it, that might give you an opening into changing it, so that the conflict could be resolved ...

So, for instance, you might find it was fear of some outcome. By being able to admit to yourself that you fear that thing, you already decrease its power over you. And then you can go to work on deciding how likely the outcome is, how damaging it really would be, and so on.

Most of us are blind-sided by the things we assume are true, by the meanings we put on things without questioning.

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