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i need help on penis size and life problems


martyofuk
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where to start.... im now 25 years of age and from newcastle from an early age i knew that i wasnt the size of the other lads, obvious reasons i noticed this the older i got. fast forward to my teenage years which was when i the mental attitude of my size really started to kick in, that teemed with the use of drugs made me very paranoid. the memories i have are that of complete darkness and not being in a good plcae atall, to date ive tried to block this whole period from my teenage years out my life just so i can move on but turley it hasnt worked. i can remember being very paranoid to the point i would get 2 socks, one stuffed in the other and tuck it in my pants with the waist keeping it in place. kind of funny cos im pretty sure it made me look way over sized with a very odd shapped penis if anyone was to have a good stare at it. this was taking place from what i remember to be 16 years of age all the way to 18 or 19 maybe even longer, at around 16 i decided id rather just work and earn money so i went into being a chef. work was good and bad so many unconfortable social situations was brought to me by working and making friends. somany sexual situatuions i just didnt feel confortable in so in the end my developed defence.... which was to push people away from me :( ive tried my best to stay the same nice person i always was but now as a 25 year old man im at the point where i dont even feel like i can work, i never see my friends and have lost touch with them apart from on facebook. im even living with my mother. i really feel like i have a disability which isnt classed as a disibiltiy. im unable to push people away anymore i feel like i have no motivation atall to do anything or even go out. ive never even had a relationship and i yearn it so much!! i still know i have that good loving person inside me masked by this grumpy man who pushes people out his life, gave up his career and had friends. i dont know what to do atall. in my mind all i hear is whats the point??? why get a job or even do anything. it wont lead anywhere apart from you ending up on your own and when my family dies i have nobody, not even kids to look after me. my size last time i measured was 6 inches, i know people on here will have smaller or biger, but seriously to me it might aswell be 1 inch cos i feel usueless with it. over the years as much advice as people have given me to fix my life not knowing the actual reason ive always shrugged it off....... so im here with people who have the same experinces hoping sombody can help me

yours sincerly martyn

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I can tell you right now if you're six inches you're torturing yourself because six inches means you're a normal man. Are you sure this is all about your dick? Sounds like you're completely shutting down. You might need to see a counselor to overall straighten out your life. Figure why you're do damn unhappy because there could be more to it than your dick size.

Have you ever been with a woman before? I'm not sure you mentioned that. If so, were the experiences bad? If not, than what the hell man... You have to get out there. You could just be holding yourself back. Just by the little bit you wrote sounds like your completely depressed and maybe you have been for years. Evaluate all the areas in your life. Are you doing things you love? Work, friends, activities and family. Or has this penis thing completely taken over your life to where you cannot find joy in anything?

Anyways welcome to the board

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have i ever been with a woman? when i was a kid yes i was with a girl, at the age of 13. i was very drunk and i remember i liked it alot but the fact it was so small at that age put me off it. i kept hiting her hands away when she went to grab it and felt so bad the day after. i actualy talked to a guy when i was 20 who was gay online, i know its weird but he ended up showing me his penis and i noticed it was the same size kinda so thought this was a solution, we met up and had "sex" but i really didnt enjoy it atall and realised i cant even bring myself to do that. wish id never done it tbh and wish i could erase the memory

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You have to understand your penis size is more than fine. YOU are the problem. The way you think and the way you're perceiving yourself is the problem.

I assume your penis works? If so, it works and it is of normal size. You're pretty much just like the majority of the world. Except they're getting laid and you're not. It's it's your fault. You can easily find a woman. You can't do it being so miserable though.

You have to make a move. If its simple as "my dick is too small" then that's and easy fix on this board.

If you have a deeper problem being unhappy or perhaps a chemical imbalance than maybe you should seek counseling.

As for blocking that sexual experience just ride with it. Fuck it man don't get hung up on it. You're trying to find your way like the rest of us. No shame in that.

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i cant even make myself change my mind frame tho i dunno whats happened to me, i had a career as a chef but i hated it so much and i dont have other qualifications so after 6 years doing that its the only job i can do apart from very badly payed ones, i dont think anyone can help me with this stuff. if u met me youd think im a happy person but in my head im so fkin unhappy!

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Well then you have to help yourself. Your best bet is to get back to making as much money as you can so you can have the ability to change professions. Dude it's not easy but I bet anyone older on her will tell you that at least you're young. You can still do it. You're digging yourself a deeper hole everyday you sit around and mope. Finding something you love doing while making good money is going to be the tough part.

Put yourself out there and just say fuck it. Go get laid. The only thing holding yourself back is you. You're going to be pissed off once it happens because of how good it's going to be. Plus you're new to this. Tell a girl. She'll think your lying but after you tell her what's up she'll love it. You'll be her new toy lol.

Get out there. Get some pussy and you'll see how fast you get a smile on your face. Who knows it might be so good it makes you work harder. Come on though man you have to stop torturing yourself.

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Hey Martyofuk - welcome. You sound bright & well spoken. I am no clinician but I suspect you may have the same problem as I do - low self esteem. Males are raised to believe we need to "measure up" in all sorts of ways & anything less means you are a failure,a loser, a weirdo, and not a man. My solution is to fight back by loving & accepting myself even if no one else ever does. I work, I pay my taxes, I obey the law, I have never harmed a soul in my life and I have as much right to be here as anyone else. I will be myself and live my life. I am no longer seeking approval or permission to be who I am.

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Hey Martyofuk - welcome. You sound bright & well spoken. I am no clinician but I suspect you may have the same problem as I do - low self esteem. Males are raised to believe we need to "measure up" in all sorts of ways & anything less means you are a failure,a loser, a weirdo, and not a man. My solution is to fight back by loving & accepting myself even if no one else ever does. I work, I pay my taxes, I obey the law, I have never harmed a soul in my life and I have as much right to be here as anyone else. I will be myself and live my life. I am no longer seeking approval or permission to be who I am.

yes low self esteem is what it is, i just feel like its in my head now and it wont get out. everything anyone has ever thought of my is in my head and it wont get out. part of me is the old martyn and the large part is the nobody who doesnt messure up and is scared to let people get close to him!
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Hey Martyofuk - welcome. You sound bright & well spoken. I am no clinician but I suspect you may have the same problem as I do - low self esteem. Males are raised to believe we need to "measure up" in all sorts of ways & anything less means you are a failure,a loser, a weirdo, and not a man. My solution is to fight back by loving & accepting myself even if no one else ever does. I work, I pay my taxes, I obey the law, I have never harmed a soul in my life and I have as much right to be here as anyone else. I will be myself and live my life. I am no longer seeking approval or permission to be who I am.

Good for you man. What an awesome attitude.

And for martyofuk,

Here me out. My dick is 4.5 inches. I'm double digits when it comes to how many women I've slept with. And I'm only 2 years older than you are. I'm getting it. Why the hell can't you? Especially when you're bigger than me.

You're holding yourself back and it's so unnecessary. Once you dive it and make something happen you're whole attitude will change. I say this to everyone else. You just need to have one positive experience to build from. Meeting girls in your mid twenties is way easier than its going to be in your forties fifties and do on. Take advantage of being young. Shit dude you're going to wake up one day old as fuck wondering what happened if you keep this up.

You have to make things happen.

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Good for you man. What an awesome attitude.

And for martyofuk,

Here me out. My dick is 4.5 inches. I'm double digits when it comes to how many women I've slept with. And I'm only 2 years older than you are. I'm getting it. Why the hell can't you? Especially when you're bigger than me.

You're holding yourself back and it's so unnecessary. Once you dive it and make something happen you're whole attitude will change. I say this to everyone else. You just need to have one positive experience to build from. Meeting girls in your mid twenties is way easier than its going to be in your forties fifties and do on. Take advantage of being young. Shit dude you're going to wake up one day old as fuck wondering what happened if you keep this up.

You have to make things happen.

how can i make things happen tho ???

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First you can start off by getting back into cooking. Make money until you can afford to take classes in something else you like. That's a shame you don't like cooking though. It's tough work but once you get very good at it, it can be extremely rewarding. A lot of the premier restaurants by me the head chefs make alot of money. But if you hate it stick it out until you find can learn a new skill on the side.

As far as girls you just have to get out there. Get your buddies and head out to the bar. Go to clubs. Be aggressive and dance with women. No confidence? Fake it till you make it. That's what people say.

You need to make a list of things you want. Start small. Honestly the easiest thing you can do is get laid. If you're decent looking. Dress nice and have some confidence talking to girls. You can fuck almost anyone. And that's no god damn joke. I'm sure there is a ladies night somewhere where you live. Half priced drink. Shit get a few drinks in you and talk to a girl. Go out with one of your buddies. Get active dude.

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your all giving me really good advice, i wish i had friends like you in life to give this advice but even then im not sure if it would help, i feel dead inside to what anybody says. im litrualy to set in my way of life to even belive anything you people are saying, no matter howmany times you say it im always gonna think its to small and im always gonna feel depressed, i wish suicide was an option but it just doesnt apeal to me atall. im not into hurting my family. i just fucking wish i didnt have this vessel or body and i could please sombody how i want to please them, which is what its all about how i want to please sombody and my expections of myself. im never going to meet them.....

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You probably need to seek counseling. You have a normal functioning body. As science shows your size is average if not slightly above. So what you're doing is torturing yourself over nothing. There are millions of girls if given the opportunity would be perfectly fine with your size and you could both enjoy each other. You have to at least try. At this point you're just assuming you can't please someone. Remember chicks love oral. That's something that has nothing to do with your size.

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Aw, Marty, no one expects you to take our word for you being a good person. No one gets self-esteem from others; that's why the word "self" is in there. I know it's hard to imagine how you can get something for yourself that you don't have already, but in fact, you already know you're a good person inside, or at least some part of you knows. The question is, what does the part of you who says you're worthless hope to accomplish by saying that?

From what I understand, you have access to counseling through the National Health. Is that a step you would consider? It's possible that a proper therapist could help you explore some of these issues.

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Saw that there was some talking about confidence. I would like to add my input to that.

Here's my opinion about confidence. It's an emotion, therefor you aim for it instead of relying on it. Let me explain.

Let's just say that you're walking down the street and you see an attractive woman and in your mind you'll know that you could in fact get her turned on by you and get her into bed and you also know that you can give her the best sex of all time in just a couple of hours. It could be an ridiculous insanely attractive woman and you still believe in yourself that you can succeed with her. Now that's a confident mindset, but will it give you success?

Actually no. Confidence is a byproduct of your success in that specific field. You cannot just fake it and then do absolutely anything while expecting to get laid.

Maybe this rings a bell. In comedy shows they usually show a specific scene, just different versions of it. This scene involves someone that suppose to carry a whole bunch of heavy bags up the stairs and a person ask "Do you need help with the bags?" and the person answers "No I'm alright" like really confident. He then carries all the bags up the stairs at once and it goes okay until he falls down the stars covered with heavy bags and says "I'm okay!!" while he looks really stupid.

Typical comedy scene. A dude fake some confidence and doesn't know shit of what he's doing and yet he continues to act all confident. Believing that he will succeed.

So it's pretty clear that confidence doesn't give you success. Instead focus on your process. Focus on what you're doing and what you have (not just the penis, but the whole picture).

Let's just say that you studied this area and you knew a whole bunch of stuff about attraction and sex and you also became more sexy. Then there's a big chance that you could get laid with that attractive woman (or whatever you want out of her). That's obviously just an example.

My point is confidence does not equal success. Process equal success. What you do matters. What you have matters (all of your properties). Confidence is just an emotion. Like a reward for a great process. It's also built up, not just added there.

Moral of the story: Do not be one of those lazy people who thinks that you only need to be confident and then you'll succeed in that field without having to do put in any effort at all. If Snooki became CEO of that particle accelerator in Cern and she starts to act all confident about that, then she'll look like an idiot.

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