Jump to content
Mental Support Community

real life vis-a-vis porn


Recommended Posts

Hello again folks,

Porn...the damned stuff has addicted me to one degree or another for at least 30 years. And all it does is discourage me about my anatomy (5"). Yes, most men in porn are large - especially in any professional scenes. It really makes it seem like the world's average cock length is 8". Still, from what I have observed in real life, most men are indeed considerably larger in the package than I am. What I also observe with porn is that when a guy who is sized more modestly shows up, it just looks lame, for lack of a better word. Like the girl's excitement is gone.

Now, perceptions like that dogged me for many years, preventing me from really venturing out with women when I was young. I was married for over ten years, and my ex-wife was not at all concerned about my dick size, though I occasionally complained/apologized for my perceived shortfall. She didn't like when I did that...though that issue was not part of our reason for divorce. Eventually, (with some help from this forum) I started thinking about how many women, certainly the type I would like, are more concerned with a man's self assurance, and other qualities, than his dick. Yes, the big dick might be exciting, but it's merely a nice "to-have" for these women (again, not all). If the guy is confident and focuses on the WOMAN, then fergettaboutit...she's all over that li'l soldier! This reality was driven home for me with a woman I recently befriended and had sex with. I didn't say jack s**t about my dick, and talked about how I was going to examine her like a good doctor would (and all that sexy play kinda stuff) and she went wild. We had a blast, and I do believe my mind is being cleansed of much of the garbage that has been stuck to its walls for all these years. So, I thank her, I thank my ex, and I thank you here in the forum. I hope some of you in true despair can believe that you deserve to get lucky with the ladies. If you think you deserve it, then some of them will too.

~u

(still addicted to porn)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awesome, siddiqui, thanks for saying that...I was hoping that what I shared would hit home with someone. So much of this stuff is a battle of the mind.

I have to admit, I came to this forum already convinced that I needed to be more confident (hence, the user name I chose), but it's been my recent sexual activity that has really started to convince me of it.

I'm sure that many in this forum would kill to have 5", just like I would (well, not so much anymore) kill to have 6. But so far, I have had sex with two (count 'em!) women in my life, and neither was the least bit concerned about my dick. Only I was.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Keep us posted bro :)

I'mma try all this

Yes, and continue to try it, even if after multiple rejections. You probably already know this, but I wouldn't start off trying to have sexy conversations with a new acquaintance, but if things progress to a point where you get flirty, don't let penis fear shut you down before you begin. Just go with it! Don't even be ready with an apology for your body, just be attentive to her yumminess. :P

Nobody will send you to jail for daring to believe you are a human trying to meet certain needs like everyone else.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Very well said U.R. - there is an excellent album by Frank Zappa same title as your screen name. Gonna have it dig that one out 2nite.

Speaking for myself I think of this penis stuff is born of poor self esteem. Self esteem is just something you have to gift yourself in this world. I like myself, I accept myself, I am on my side & if anyone has a different view they are welcome to it & if they have nothing better to do than put me down then that kinda tells their story.

I wish the best to all the guys on this

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Very well said U.R. - there is an excellent album by Frank Zappa same title as your screen name. Gonna have it dig that one out 2nite.

Speaking for myself I think of this penis stuff is born of poor self esteem. Self esteem is just something you have to gift yourself in this world. I like myself, I accept myself, I am on my side & if anyone has a different view they are welcome to it & if they have nothing better to do than put me down then that kinda tells their story.

I wish the best to all the guys (and gals) on this forum. There definitely are women that would love a good man regardless of a couple inches.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

there is an excellent album by Frank Zappa same title as your screen name. Gonna have it dig that one out 2nite.

Yep! I stole the name from Zappa (though I was never too big on that particular album).

Speaking for myself I think of this penis stuff is born of poor self esteem. Self esteem is just something you have to gift yourself in this world. I like myself, I accept myself, I am on my side & if anyone has a different view they are welcome to it & if they have nothing better to do than put me down then that kinda tells their story.

I wish the best to all the guys (and gals) on this forum. There definitely are women that would love a good man regardless of a couple inches.

Really, really well said!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just a follow-up comment here... I have met with the woman mentioned in the original post three times now for passionate sex. She is quite experienced...the number of partners in her life definitely exceeds ten. And I have two observations that I hope are worth thinking about:

1.) Being a giving lover with many (most?) women is super important, as important as having a functioning member. Complimenting, caressing, undressing, slowly kissing, licking, nibbling around the body, etc. I think even if your cock is very small, this will make the experience positive for everyone. If you have a tiny pecker and just try to go in without any communication and foreplay - or if you are paralyzed with fear, then you could fulfill the prophecy of doom.

2.) The pecker I have (five inches long, rather curved, and I guess regular width -- a standard condom stays on when I'm erect) is PLENTY...especially in light of point #1 above. I can't speak for any other sizes, and I didn't quiz my partner about dicks...didn't even ask how big she's had before or anything like that. We on this board with five or more inches - and I hope this goes for smaller sizes, too - really have to stop the bullshit thinking. It is enough. She loved my member, played with it, did everything to drive me wild, and not because I told her I needed affirmation. This fabulous woman has helped cure me, I mean it!

PS - And she is not a wisp of a woman, either: 5' 6", big frame, huge bosom...I have always figured I needed a very petite gymnast type to make this work, and I'm glad to discover that's not true.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2.) The pecker I have (five inches long, rather curved, and I guess regular width -- a standard condom stays on when I'm erect) is PLENTY...especially in light of point #1 above. I can't speak for any other sizes, and I didn't quiz my partner about dicks...didn't even ask how big she's had before or anything like that.

Well that's a bummer. I thought you were on this forum because of a genuinely small penis. Well according to medical literature your penis is actually average. I would do anything to have an "average" sized penis, not a huge one. And I mean ANYTHING. Mine is 4 inches on a good day with 4 inches girth. That is real shitty. It sucks alright.

I really had enjoyed this thread until this revelation

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I mentioned my size in the original post..,this sucks if you've lost the momentum...I still think its worth a shot.

Also, and this is less important, is 5" really average? I have not seen many erections in real life, but nearly every dick I have seen in every changing room or restroom is considerably larger than mine, like they're as long and or thick as my erection when they are still limp. I would believe 6", but not 5".

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I mentioned my size in the original post..,this sucks if you've lost the momentum...I still think its worth a shot.

Also, and this is less important, is 5" really average? I have not seen many erections in real life, but nearly every dick I have seen in every changing room or restroom is considerably larger than mine, like they're as long and or thick as my erection when they are still limp. I would believe 6", but not 5".

I'm a doctor and I've seen all shapes and sizes. Trust me when I say 5 inches in average. In medical literature the mean ranges from 5.0 to 5.8 inches

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Holy smokes, I guess we who are on the smaller side of the mean really hide ourselves well. Even going by the obviously more bulging trousers of so many guys, I assumed I was well below average.

I don't know what to say, except that I understand the torment of feeling too small. I really hope some fellas here can make the discovery I have and turn the corner on this issue. I recently read one poster stating he had 6", so maybe my post would help him more? But I can't tell you that my experience with this particular lover would have been a disaster if I had four inches instead of five...I just don't know. I have no clue what my girth is, btw. The dimensions overall look in normal proportions.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ps- I'm quite small when limp and the girl I was with thought it was cute...I was ok with that. I don't plan on hitting any orgies.

Yea well I'm 2 inches when limp so that sucks. And if your woman has had 10 guys I'm pretty sure she knows what an average size is. Which is yours. Sucks for us

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I hope you will find some happiness, whatever you do. It might be worth it, before you commit to surgery, to get online or go to a bar or singles event, and try to hook up with a woman who is open about having sex. If things go well, you might be able to move on...otherwise you might just feel even more sure about surgery.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...