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Some positive anecdotal evidence of our adequacy & my "brief" thoughts on female orgasms


ShameOnThem
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Anecdotal Evidence of Our Adequacy

I spend a lot of time reading on the internet, and I came across this discussion that was personally encouraging. They don't say how small these penises are, and we don't know for certain if this is anything other than 3-4 people personal experience and not a larger trend, but I find it encouraging to read a discussion of women talking about having successful sex with smaller penises. Obviously, this will only make you feel better about yourself if you let it, and there are plenty of things to be critical of, but I know it personally made me feel good about my prospects of making my partner orgasm.

Bill Russel sums up my thoughts on the matter pretty succinctly:

"What these youngbloods have to understand is that this game has always been, and will always be about [orgasms]".

Now for the verbose thoughts. I know some other guys on this forum think differently for themselves, but I don't think my pride is all that important when it comes to the relationship between me and my future partner(s). The only thing that should matter is if they're getting orgasms/buckets from our intercourse sessions. That's all I should need to know, and I think I'd be content with that. Orgasm are great, they're what make you feel complete after sex and they're what you appreciate the next day. I don't care who else she has been with and how big they were, because she's with me now and not them. It used to really bother me that all of my partners' friends would know that I had a small penis, and I know trust is still an issue for me and others here, but eventually I realized that A.) this is inevitable and trying to prevent it will only make my insecurity have a greater impact on our relationship, and B.) if she also tells them at the same time how frequently and awesomely she orgasms from our love making, then I really shouldn't care because she's the only one I'm having sex with. If they don't like small penises, whatever, because she does and she enjoys our sex. And hey, maybe she only orgasms from fingering or oral or a vibrator, again, whatever, because it's really just about buckets, right? Less than half of women orgasm from PIV regardless of size. We'd still have PIV sex, and I'd still orgasm from that. I mean, it's really just about getting buckets for her too, right? She would get as much out of it as I would get out of orally giving her an orgasm.

I have that conflict of pride that I think everyone here does as well, that I feel bad about my penis because there are numerous scientific studies and countless anecdotes and cultural influences that tell me I'm too small to please a woman. But shouldn't I also take pride in how happy my partner is sexually? I mean, guys are easy, if we came, we're happy, but if I can make a woman orgasm a lot as well, shouldn't that fill that void in my pride? That void is societal, if I'm getting buckets, what's the void really about then? Other than procreation, which I'm assuming I'm still good for, isn't that all our sex organs are about? If she came, and she doesn't want to break up with me and enjoys giving me orgasms too, isn't she happy? I know that the small penis meme is a source of humor for all of the insensitive people out there, but isn't it also kind of funny how weird/mystical the female orgasm is and how women fake it all the time with men of all sizes just so that we'll stop fucking them and how some women can't even get there at all while others can get there just by thinking really hard about it? That's batshit crazy weird, like 100x weirder than my penis being 33% smaller than the average penis. I don't really know where I'm going with this, but I just think that if orgasms are the main goal of sex, and women can get plenty of orgasms from small penises or no penises, why shouldn't I just get really good at dishing out orgasms and making my partner happy?

From what I understand, universally for both sexes, the single most attractive thing about an individual is confidence. Obviously looks in totallity are more important, but compared to any one aspect ie. the face or your butt or your legs or whatever, being confident is what makes other's want to be with you the most. So if sex is the end goal of relationships, and the end goal of sex is orgasms, and I become confident in giving orgasms in all ways possible... Idk, I'm really just rambling, and I am far from a success story. Getting to a point of confidence in giving orgasms would require a lot of practice and an honest and communicative partner, so maybe I'm just blowing smoke. But I'd like to hear what you guys think about the discussion in the link and your thoughts on getting buckets.

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Hey Shame, thanks for trying to be positive & for bringing some fresh material.

There are a lot of ways to feel good in this world, orgasms being just one of them so let's keep it in perspective. In other words there is more to the relationship than sex.

No guy wants to be small but we have to decide just how miserable it is going to make us.

Nina Hartley has a good video on You Tube where she says that if a smaller guy can work it up and down, thrusting in angles it will feel like a larger penis because it will hit all the spots.

I strongly encourage everyone to pursue a good relationship. I have not done so, but think it is a good idea.

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Yeah, if someone wants to come on these boards and just sulk or vent, it's their right. But this is a damn SPS forum and I'm here to help heal my mind, and suggesting that our penises are useless because they aren't big enough, I just think that's bullshit. My penis works, maybe it could be more pleasurable, but there is pleasure to be had from it. There are a lot of hurtful things out there for us to read, I know of one article that I read(on a popular feminist blog???) that literally had me tearing up because I felt so bad about my body(I won't ever link it to here because it is just horrible, but I saw someone else post to it's discussion board about how they felt the same and I think I'm going to ask them to take it down). But that's just talk, and while most women wouldn't prefer our penises to others, that doesn't mean that a large percentage of them wouldn't tolerate it because the rest of our totality of being is worth a little bit of compromise. And if your feeling bad for about your body because of something marked "SPH," realize that shit is all a fake production. That clip a fictional movie, and SPH is a fetish that people create on purpose. None of it is real, and if a person really does feel that way or acts like that in real life, they are just a plain old bad person. I don't want to associate myself with people like that in any facet of my life, especially any type romantic relationship. What should I care what they have to say?

Once a woman is committed to a relationship with you, it's just a matter of making it work for them through communication and changing things up, and that's what I'm talking about above. If generating orgasms with our bodies is attainable, then that should be enough for ourselves and our partners. If it's not enough for them, then we can find someone else. But if it's not enough for us individually to please our partners with what we've got, well I don't know if we'll ever be able to be truly happy with ourselves. No matter what anybody else is telling you, especially that voice inside your head, love yourself and be happy with your life. Or don't and try to jelq and extra quarter inch out(not trying to be an douche, i think if this helps heal your brain you should absolutely do it), but you'd be wrong if you think getting all the way to average is going to make some asshole size queen or macho "alpha" male not joke about your "small" penis any less. I doubt there are really women out there who would turn you down because of your 4" penis but give you a shot with a 4.5" penis, it's not like their measuring, and they are either going to like your dick or not. If they like it, then they probably don't care much about size and just want to be with someone who is happy and makes them happy. Nobody wants to be with someone who is miserable, because it will make them miserable too.

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While it's great that you are self-assured, I fear your positivity stems from denial rather than genuine confidence.

Most women today have their ego inflated by the droves of desperate men that hit on them non-stop. Prior to the widespread infection of society by social media, it took real"balls" to approach and/or convey feelings of romantic and sexual interest. Consequently, women were much more down-to-earth, and lacked the sense of entitlement that they feel today.

All a woman has to do today is smile, take a picture, share it on Facebook/Twitter/fill in the blank, and recieve all the attenion and flattery she could ever dream of.

Taking all of this into consideration, do you really think that a woman is going to tolerate, let alone accept, a small penis when she has countless other prospective suitors chasing her all day? If you do, I have a bridge you may be interested in purchasing.

While it's important to stay sane, I also believe we should accept the reality of our situation. For many, this means never having a normal sex life. It isn't fair, but it's the way things are.

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I'm in denial of what? That my penis is worthless and no woman will ever love me because of it? Yeah, I deny that. That a woman would never choose to be with me if she had anybody else with a bigger penis to choose from? Yeah, I deny that too. Guys are more than their dicks, women are more than their boobs and ass, isn't being happy with someone's personality or their character count for something? If a woman has other suitors and wants to move on to someone else, then that's the way things are and there ain't shit I can do about it, but there are plenty of women on this earth who would be thrilled to spend the rest of their lives with me. You think that's denial because I have a 4" penis? You must not know anything about me or anything about women.

A majority of women do not orgasm from penetration, they need clitoral stimulation instead. The clitoris is on the outside of the vagina, so why can't we have a normal sex life? Maybe you're right that I won't ever be able to get a woman to orgasm consistently, but if I really love some woman and she loves me back, I'd put on a vibrating, 12" strap-on to fuck her before I'd let her wish for more orgasms.

Sexual preferences are what they are, but not everyone agrees that a small penis can't be satisfying. And if somebody love everything about you except your penis, including you being able to make them orgasm through manual clitoral stimulation, your partner would dumb to leave you for some extra length or girth. Idk, maybe I'm the one in denial, but if you guys are certain that you could never make a woman happy to be in a relationship with you, well that's just depressing as shit. I know SPS really sucks, it hurts every time I think about it, but there are people in way worse conditions than we are, and they find ways to be happy. So be sad if you want, but I'm not going to make any excuses.

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Most women today have their ego inflated by the droves of desperate men that hit on them non-stop. Prior to the widespread infection of society by social media, it took real"balls" to approach and/or convey feelings of romantic and sexual interest. Consequently, women were much more down-to-earth, and lacked the sense of entitlement that they feel today.

All a woman has to do today is smile, take a picture, share it on Facebook/Twitter/fill in the blank, and recieve all the attenion and flattery she could ever dream of.

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Anecdotal Evidence of Our Adequacy

I spend a lot of time reading on the internet, and I came across this discussion that was personally encouraging. They don't say how small these penises are, and we don't know for certain if this is anything other than 3-4 people personal experience and not a larger trend, but I find it encouraging to read a discussion of women talking about having successful sex with smaller penises. Obviously, this will only make you feel better about yourself if you let it, and there are plenty of things to be critical of, but I know it personally made me feel good about my prospects of making my partner orgasm.

Bill Russel sums up my thoughts on the matter pretty succinctly:

"What these youngbloods have to understand is that this game has always been, and will always be about [orgasms]".

Now for the verbose thoughts. I know some other guys on this forum think differently for themselves, but I don't think my pride is all that important when it comes to the relationship between me and my future partner(s). The only thing that should matter is if they're getting orgasms/buckets from our intercourse sessions. That's all I should need to know, and I think I'd be content with that. Orgasm are great, they're what make you feel complete after sex and they're what you appreciate the next day. I don't care who else she has been with and how big they were, because she's with me now and not them. It used to really bother me that all of my partners' friends would know that I had a small penis, and I know trust is still an issue for me and others here, but eventually I realized that A.) this is inevitable and trying to prevent it will only make my insecurity have a greater impact on our relationship, and B.) if she also tells them at the same time how frequently and awesomely she orgasms from our love making, then I really shouldn't care because she's the only one I'm having sex with. If they don't like small penises, whatever, because she does and she enjoys our sex. And hey, maybe she only orgasms from fingering or oral or a vibrator, again, whatever, because it's really just about buckets, right? Less than half of women orgasm from PIV regardless of size. We'd still have PIV sex, and I'd still orgasm from that. I mean, it's really just about getting buckets for her too, right? She would get as much out of it as I would get out of orally giving her an orgasm.

I have that conflict of pride that I think everyone here does as well, that I feel bad about my penis because there are numerous scientific studies and countless anecdotes and cultural influences that tell me I'm too small to please a woman. But shouldn't I also take pride in how happy my partner is sexually? I mean, guys are easy, if we came, we're happy, but if I can make a woman orgasm a lot as well, shouldn't that fill that void in my pride? That void is societal, if I'm getting buckets, what's the void really about then? Other than procreation, which I'm assuming I'm still good for, isn't that all our sex organs are about? If she came, and she doesn't want to break up with me and enjoys giving me orgasms too, isn't she happy? I know that the small penis meme is a source of humor for all of the insensitive people out there, but isn't it also kind of funny how weird/mystical the female orgasm is and how women fake it all the time with men of all sizes just so that we'll stop fucking them and how some women can't even get there at all while others can get there just by thinking really hard about it? That's batshit crazy weird, like 100x weirder than my penis being 33% smaller than the average penis. I don't really know where I'm going with this, but I just think that if orgasms are the main goal of sex, and women can get plenty of orgasms from small penises or no penises, why shouldn't I just get really good at dishing out orgasms and making my partner happy?

From what I understand, universally for both sexes, the single most attractive thing about an individual is confidence. Obviously looks in totallity are more important, but compared to any one aspect ie. the face or your butt or your legs or whatever, being confident is what makes other's want to be with you the most. So if sex is the end goal of relationships, and the end goal of sex is orgasms, and I become confident in giving orgasms in all ways possible... Idk, I'm really just rambling, and I am far from a success story. Getting to a point of confidence in giving orgasms would require a lot of practice and an honest and communicative partner, so maybe I'm just blowing smoke. But I'd like to hear what you guys think about the discussion in the link and your thoughts on getting buckets.

Your lack of self loathing disturbs me.

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Maybe that is something to explore, dvn? Sometimes thinking patterns can feel comfortable because we're used to them even if they cause us pain. But one way to create a chance for positive change is to challenge our thoughts and that can feel uncomfortable at first.

Negative things feel more realistic to me. Like I will die alone, a virgin, and miserable sounds more reasonable - opposed to a woman who wants to be with me.

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