Still insecure about my small penis - at Age 60

[EricDavis2]

I shared my story on this topic many years ago - telling about the fear, embarrassment, shame, and loneliness I've experienced in my life due to my small size. About how I've been intimate with very few women because I'm afraid to let a woman see how small it is. That the only sex i ever get is with prostitutes because they HAVE to have sex with me since I'm paying them (almost exclusively getting oral sex).

I've received advice, support, concern, and honest caring attitude from other people on this site. They try to affect my way of thinking by being positive and helpful. And, after wallowing in self pity for a long time, I finally tried to change my mental approach. I tried to tell myself I can do this. I really did.

But guess what. I'm now 60 years old. I have no girlfriend, and haven't had one for years. The last girl I dated busted my optimism I was trying to build by telling me she already has a "fuck buddy", and dumped me after our last date which was, get this, on Valentine's Day!!

My confidence (however shallow it was) is completely gone. I have to battle bouts of depression because of my situation. I go to friends houses alone - as always. In fact they've never even SEEN me with a girlfriend (many probably think I'm gay because of that fact). Now, they are good friends - they never bust my chops about being alone, and they don't treat me differently because of it. Thank God for that, otherwise I'd NEVER leave the house.

And to those "experts" that think us guys are exaggerating the smallness of our penises, that we hate women because they reject us, and that think we're misguided because we watch porn HEAR THIS: I'm not stupid. I don't THINK my dick is small. I am a grown, educated adult. I know the difference between an average dick (whether it's 5 inches erect, 6 inches, whatever) and mine. This is NOT a frame of mind - it is reality. These "doctors" wouldn't have these theories if they had to live with carrying a penis this small like guys like me do.

I'm a nice guy. I know I have many good qualities and that I deserve happiness. I'm kind, considerate of others, friendly and a caring individual. But I'm also very, very lonely. I'm shy and reserved and ashamed about the package I have (or don't have). And finally, the advice to "be yourself" doesn't fly. Who ELSE do you think I've been? If I could be "like someone else", then I could be confident, cocky, bold, forward, and full of myself like the guys out there that can get a woman anytime they want. That's not me - I wish I was like that. I'm stuck with being myself: a social, sexual failure.

[Victimorthecrime]

I remember you Eric. Your posts were always well thought out. I believe you had some financial struggles too if I recall correctly.

There are no answers. Life is brutal, humans are predictors of the highest order.

The only advice I could give anyone is to do their best and hope for the best, take it one day at a time.

I am 52 & can relate. I am not super small but it would not matter if it was bigger or smaller at this point. It really wouldn't, nothing would change.

[Victimorthecrime]

Sorry I meant to say "predators" not predictors lol

[Resolute]

Sorry I meant to say "predators" not predictors lol

ya,i/we kinda deciphered that one.

[Victimorthecrime]

^^^ You are a Troll.

[EricDavis2]

Thanks for your response "Victim". I guess at my age I can't expect miracles. And even with the dispare and hopelessness I feel, in the back of my mind I still hope that I can get a break some day. I'm not holding my breath for it, though - my face would turn to a very dark shade of purple

When I was younger, I had more opportunities to date but missed the signals because of my lack of self-esteem. I just thought these girls just "liked" me, but wouldn't really have any interest in going to bed with me. Funny, (not really tho), now that I'm much older and have trained myself to be more aware of any chances I might have with someone, those chances have completely disappeared. The last person I went out with was set up for me by a friend. But that lasted with my infamous Valentine's Day date.

So as my eyes opened, all the doors closed - slammed shut.

[Resolute]

^^^ You are a Troll.

forget to take our medication,did we?

[Victimorthecrime]

When I stop & think about my male friends who have gotten married I realize that in every case it was the woman that chose them. She made eye contact, she smiled, she stayed in proximity of him, laughed at his jokes, etc.

The point is, don't beat up on yourself for not having seen opportunities or made moves sooner. The idea that a guy can learn strategies to bed women is bullshit - the psychological companion to penis enlargement pills. If they dig you they will let you know if they don't all the monkey shines in the world won't help.

[Victimorthecrime]

forget to take our medication,did we?

[Victimorthecrime]

Ahhh another loving Christian. Sarcasm and cheap shots are all you got. Are those the only gifts The Lord gave you?

[Resolute]

When I stop & think about my male friends who have gotten married I realize that in every case it was the woman that chose them. She made eye contact, she smiled, she stayed in proximity of him, laughed at his jokes, etc.

The point is, don't beat up on yourself for not having seen opportunities or made moves sooner. The idea that a guy can learn strategies to bed women is bullshit - the psychological companion to penis enlargement pills. If they dig you they will let you know if they don't all the monkey shines in the world won't help.

either you fail to realize,or just dismiss the fact that we can (at least somewhat) influence our chances by doing or not doing certain things,saying or not saying certain things,behaving (or not) a certain way,and so on.

[Resolute]

Ahhh another loving Christian. Sarcasm and cheap shots are all you got. Are those the only gifts The Lord gave you?

i really don't know what's up your ass tonight buddy (excuse my language).

all i said was that from the context,it was clear that you meant "predators" and not "predictors"; i don't know what that triggered in you exactly.

and to answer your question,no,the lord has bestowed many gifts upon me.

[Jessie]

looking back all my 4 ex GFs gave me encouraging signals…. or at least didnt retreat when we were together in social situations….

i tried speed dating a fews years ago… had some success at getting numbers…. as did some pretty ugly guys so….

[someone555]

That's because the woman chooses the man. Which is why chasing women is a waste of time but men do it anyhow, because they've been told to.

i agree, thats how you become the one they "settle with" because they own you

wait for a girl to chase you, treat her like shit, and she'll fall in love with you.

[retsuud]

That's because the woman chooses the man. Which is why chasing women is a waste of time but men do it anyhow, because they've been told to.

Ofcourse, everybody chooses someone right? Women choose men, men choose women. It's not so black & white as some of you here try to let it be.

[augustwest]

I'm 59 and still feel insecure but have made great strides from where I started.

[Resolute]

I'm 59 and still feel insecure but have made great strides from where I started.

that's great news,needless to say,keep up the good work.

[Victimorthecrime]

I'm 59 and still feel insecure but have made great strides from where I started.

You've made a new start augustwest, congrats.

[retsuud]

I shared my story on this topic many years ago - telling about the fear, embarrassment, shame, and loneliness I've experienced in my life due to my small size. About how I've been intimate with very few women because I'm afraid to let a woman see how small it is. That the only sex i ever get is with prostitutes because they HAVE to have sex with me since I'm paying them (almost exclusively getting oral sex).

I've received advice, support, concern, and honest caring attitude from other people on this site. They try to affect my way of thinking by being positive and helpful. And, after wallowing in self pity for a long time, I finally tried to change my mental approach. I tried to tell myself I can do this. I really did.

But guess what. I'm now 60 years old. I have no girlfriend, and haven't had one for years. The last girl I dated busted my optimism I was trying to build by telling me she already has a "fuck buddy", and dumped me after our last date which was, get this, on Valentine's Day!!

My confidence (however shallow it was) is completely gone. I have to battle bouts of depression because of my situation. I go to friends houses alone - as always. In fact they've never even SEEN me with a girlfriend (many probably think I'm gay because of that fact). Now, they are good friends - they never bust my chops about being alone, and they don't treat me differently because of it. Thank God for that, otherwise I'd NEVER leave the house.

And to those "experts" that think us guys are exaggerating the smallness of our penises, that we hate women because they reject us, and that think we're misguided because we watch porn HEAR THIS: I'm not stupid. I don't THINK my dick is small. I am a grown, educated adult. I know the difference between an average dick (whether it's 5 inches erect, 6 inches, whatever) and mine. This is NOT a frame of mind - it is reality. These "doctors" wouldn't have these theories if they had to live with carrying a penis this small like guys like me do.

I'm a nice guy. I know I have many good qualities and that I deserve happiness. I'm kind, considerate of others, friendly and a caring individual. But I'm also very, very lonely. I'm shy and reserved and ashamed about the package I have (or don't have). And finally, the advice to "be yourself" doesn't fly. Who ELSE do you think I've been? If I could be "like someone else", then I could be confident, cocky, bold, forward, and full of myself like the guys out there that can get a woman anytime they want. That's not me - I wish I was like that. I'm stuck with being myself: a social, sexual failure.

Have you ever tried some internet dating? I think it's a wonderful solution for people that don't make contact with other people easily.

[jacksil]

Well like it or not size does matter to most women who say it doesn't. I myself don't have a bigger package or an average one I say. I have been with many women and I could easily satisfy them most of the times because I try my own things. One advice I could give you is, try using safe pills that could give you great erection. Because when you do have an erection that last longer you could easily keep going and ejaculate two three times during the intercourse. Believe me Longer the better for most women. Here is what I have used for myself, I don't know posting links here is a good idea or not but anyway <link removed> Also I should mention that there are not one but many other ways to satisfy women like incorporating sex toys and roll playing. Perhaps longer oral sex or even a third person if you are into it.

Also I give thumbs up for Internet Dating as well.

Edited November 4, 2014 by malign
Link removed. I'm sure people will be able to find it without us advertising it.