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Woah, woah... Respect?


ThePetPerson
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Upon my return to this forum I have loved seeing how this community has flourished! All of the old members, and although I don't know them personally, have been great pillars of support in my life, I love them dearly. All of the new members who seem so caring and kind. (Don't be fooled by my post count, I've been a member of this forum for nearly 5 years!)

That being said, something has been niggling at me. Previously, if you had a problem with someone, or something, you would bring it up. Everyone would take control of their issues within the community, as mature adults, and if they felt unable to do so, would speak to an admid/mod.

I have noticed more recently that people have taken to making sarcastic comments that are TOTALLY unnecessary, even if it's only a joke, they could be taken out of context. Then there's the derogatory terms some people like to use, ranging from relatively minor things like calling women "chicks" to the more extreme "whores". Out of order, on all counts. Often, people like to shoot people down by telling them they "don't understand".

Can everyone just remember the sensitive nature of this forum? There is an element of maturity, in being able to brush things off, but there is also an element of compassion, in thinking before you speak.

Maybe people disagree, but that's my opinion. Any thoughts?

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Well said, Olivia. Thank you. When I see objectifying terms like that, I wonder if there aren't some pretty intense cognitive distortions behind these feelings of blame and anger. What disturbs me is I don't see very much interest in disputing and working to correct cognitive distortions. It seems like many folks are merely marinating in their own frustrations and reinforcing the cognitive distortions of others. I used to live like that, so I can recognize it easily. Alternatively, maybe I am just projecting. Nonetheless I totally agree with your point. We could all use a little compassion, especially those of us with the problems that brought us to this forum in the first place. Where are we going to get any compassion, if not from each other, i.e., others facing similar struggles?

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Victimof, glad I'm not the only one!

Mts, are you alright? This is open discussion, you can say anything and we won't view it as selfish.

Inevitably Realistic, that area of the forum has grown very out of hand unfortunately.

Ralph, it's good to see you around! I completely agree, certain areas/members of the forum seem to encourage complacency, and fuel each others anger and distress in apparent relish. I would not say you are projecting, I would say your perceptions are on the nose.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Where is this? I just desire to know so that I may avoid such negligence and obscenities. Also, PetPerson, disregard their statements and know the value and worth within yourself. Their comments are trash meant to drag others down as well, pay no heed and they will soon dissipate since there is no longer fuel for their flaming.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I'm glad I'm not the only one to feel this way. It disgusts me. I wasn't singling out that area but that, in particular, is the worst forum for it. I hate it. 90% of the use of this site appears to be misogynistic men complaining that no-one will suck them off, and anyone that will isn't pretty enough because pretty girls only care about size, not their obviously charming personalities. Boooring, it got old a long time ago. Such arrogant narcissism doesn't get respect.

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