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The Science of Awkwardness

Guest ChinaDoll

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For me personally, when awkwardness reaches the level of phobia/BDD, the "don't worry because no one notices" advice becomes a hinderance...strangers not only remember me but start actively disliking and avoiding me.

I guess it's possible I think too much into it.

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I think it's awful that awkwardness (in conversation, in sports, in dancing, in any kind of performance) is such a source of shame in our culture.

I mean, these are not cruel or harmful behaviors we're talking about here; they damage nothing and no one.

Yet, because our culture's values are so saturated with the values of the entertainment industry,

we look down our noses on any one (and i'm one of them) whose behavior doesn't measure up to the benchmark in -- this is the core idea, watch for it -- a bunch of activities that DON'T MATTER.

I mean, they do matter because people assign importance to them: you can't be awkward if you're a salesperson looking to make a sale, or a single person trying to get a date. But see, that's only because everyone out there has such shallow values. And it means a lot of useful valuable people get ignored or even shamed. What a wretched situation.

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