Leslieacost

Well, this is distressing... I know as a certain fact that I am sexually attracted to adult males. I always have been, quite strongly. (I am biologically a male) I never had second thoughts, only when I was trying to convince myself that I was straight. I am 20 years old. I never felt any attraction for children, or even worried about that kind of thing, but one day, randomly, I became aroused near a child, I don't know if it was BY the child though... But that was deeply distressing, and I found myself feeling nauseous later on. I have never looked at cp, nor do I ever intend to for months, these thoughts never came to mind and I continued on fully attracted to adult males (as I always am) but one night, I was watching To Catch a Predator and I guess it triggered the thoughts again, and the sexual image of a child popped into my head and I became aroused, which I soon became repulsed by. If this continues, I may commit suicide to be honest. Obviously, I would NEVER touch a child in that manner, but I cannot live with such repulsing thoughts, I was also considering the possibility that since it is such a taboo and different thought, that that's why it was arousing, and not the child itself. Keep in mind that I maintain strong sexual arousal for adult males, which are of my primary, majority interest. In fact, in the past, just for the certainty, before this whole worry about paedophilia, I tried to have a paedophilic thought and it was revolting and unpleasing to me. I was diagnosed with OCD at age 11