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The war is far from over feeling a bit sick and paranoid were i live at probably from lack of sleep.i dont know. Ive self harmed this morning triggered by a picture of burns made me want to burn the whole thing mostly.didn't succeed.just really red and i put it away what i used cause mom if she found out she would hide it or lock it up.my dad doesn't pay much attention to self harm things i use unless its his razors. I believe i may have diabetes theres nothing here to eat most of the time band my dad goes to his shows and brings always back sweets i eat cause i like it and nothing else to eat. If my next blood test is positive for diabetes i will blame my dad cause he knows im prediabetic. And i don't know what ill do. But for now okay besides self harming im trying to make a book about kindness. Its 100 pages and i did it in a day believe it or not. I guess anything is possible.when you try and dont give up.

Hey guys! I am new to this forum and I wanted to start a post about the stigma of mental illness in today's society. Unfortunately this is something that still runs rampant. In a culture today which is more or less accepting of gays, and people of all different beliefs and cultural backgrounds you would think that mental illness would be treated as any other disease. Sadly, this is not the case. People who suffer from mental illness are the ones who in my opinon need the most support and unconditional love. I myself have been unwittingly battling depression since the age of 9 and was only diagnosed and medicated a little over a year ago. I am 21 now. I felt such shame about my diagnosis, I could barely say the word depression out loud, because that would mean branding myself with the unmentionable. I never told my closest friends about it for the longest time. I was hurting so deeply in silence because of my fear to come clean about my illness. Even now, I keep my condition pretty hush hush. ONly those closest to me know. I'm afraid if it were to get out it could affect my career, social life, and dating. I am no longer ashamed of who I am, but the reality is I still am not able to fully disclose who I am because of the above mentioned reasons. This is ridiculous. Having experienced depression pretty badly myself I know how much it would have helped if I had had the courage I needed to come clean. Depression is not a result of lacking willpower or strength of character. On the contrary, the people I know whom have suffered depression are the strongest people I know. Depression is the hardest disease because there is no one bringing you get well cards or flowers. You are all alone in your darkness and have to fight through it on your own. No one around you truly knows what you are dealing with. They just see you as lazy, irresponsible or self centered. I had so many misunderstandings with my friends when I would seemingly blow them off because I was "tired" when really I barely had the strength to live another day. They saw me as being uncaring, but that was the time I needed them the most. We all have to work together to eradicate this stigma of mental illness so the people suffering in silence can truly get the help they need.