RazeU

Hello all and thanks for reading. I have read for hours and hours from dozens of forums on the topic of this post and have come to the realization that there's no good answer. So I guess maybe this is just for conversation or venting. But here goes. I am a 31 year old man. Mostly happily married. My wife is beautiful, crazy smart, and super successful. In fact she's a 28 year old nurse practitioner. We have 2 beautiful daughters ages 2 and 4. I have a good job, as good as can be had in our area with no college. Sounds like a good life doesn't it? You'd be wrong if you said yes. It all means nothing to me. Because I sincerely hate myself. You see, I have a small penis. Sounds childish right? I feel the same. But it doesn't invalidate the emotion. For specifics I'm roughly 1 inch to nonexistent flaccid and 4ish inches on a good day when erect. Measuring is honestly too depressing so those are estimates. My wife seems to enjoy our sex life and says it is amazing. She seems to have many orgasms from all activities, even my pitiful penile penetration. She says my size is obviously perfect for her. But in my mind I can't make myself believe I can satisfy her. She's got to be acting? Pretending? Lying to me and maybe even herself for the good of the marriage? Dark thoughts there. Despite what should be a very happy life, I hate myself. Cannot judge myself based on any other criteria. Cannot believe it even if someone says something good about me, pertaining to any area of life. And it's getting worse and time goes by. Part of the problem might be that I know there is no hope to fix the problem. I'm stuck with it. And will be judged by that by society forever. A society that says a man is supposed to be a man, yet whose physical embodiment of manhood is something completely out of the control of the individual man. I mean... show me one male protagonist from any media outlet that's fat or implied to have a small penis lol. This issue runs sooo much deeper than what I see in most posts on the issue, which are solely worried about the sexual aspect. It goes all the way back to the primal, base male psyche. I feel worthless. I have no motivation to try to achieve more with life because no matter what I achieve, this issue will still be staring at me when I get out of every shower I ever take. I've no desire for social interaction because even if I never see a buddy's penis, I will always resent him because I know I don't measure up. So tell me, I've exhausted all information I can find. I've accepted the facts. Physically there is nothing to be done. What else can I do? Acceptance is the only option I see... but I've already freely accepted and admitted the problem. I, Chris, have a tiny penis. It feels like the only thing left to accept is that I will feel this miserable, hate myself this much, forever. Please tell me there are ways to deal with this that I have missed? Please help me...