New Glasses!
Okay, that's not really a blog topic, but it does explain my new profile pic. Less glare off my lenses allows me to look straight at the camera, so that my dome isn't quite so visible ... Anyway, this is me; hello. :-)
My actual topic is the meeting with my wife on Saturday. It only lasted about three hours, but it left me so irritated that I'm still processing through it.
It bothers me a great deal that I don't seem to be able to get through a meeting with her without getting so angry that I storm away. The way I see it, if I were able to be properly assertive, I would be setting my boundaries, and if she refused to honor them, I could leave with dignity, without having to lose my temper, first.
But something gets me tangled up in what she says, to the point where I'm hurt before I even realize what is happening. The opportunity to set boundaries never arises. I find myself pushing down anger without a clear perception of where it came from. If I don't even know what's wrong, I don't know how to assert myself; I don't know what boundary to request if I don't know which one got crossed.
It makes me feel as if I haven't really learned much during this marriage. I'm just as manipulable as I was when we started.
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