Not blogging for this many days is a bit like falling off the wagon.

And the reason is similar. Motivation for progress is pretty much gone; I'm just maintaining at the moment.

My Dad went to the hospital for dizziness on Friday. After several days, they sent him home without finding anything. Now he's spending a few days in the medical ward at the retirement home he lives in, trying to find out whether he's at risk of falling before he goes back to living alone.

I've visited each day from Saturday on. I don't mind, and it helps to make up for only visiting Mom once. It makes me tired and lonely, though, despite the extra contact. I don't feel strong enough for this, and life doesn't seem to care.

So I do the thing in front of me, whatever it is, but nothing that isn't the next thing, like pay bills, look for work ... And I wait for it to catch up to me.