Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 everything's so confusing. what's the point of living if we're all gonna die anyway? I hate regret. I wish I could control how I feel. I wish I could be thinner and I wish I wasn't a failure. I walked for 3 hours today and I still don't feel better.. nothing can distract me anymore and i'm getting old, well i feel like i am anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smallstar Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 good question invisible, what's the point of living just to die? Sometimes I get stuck on that question, like where's the point at all? Even if you're happy all the time and have a great life, still where's the point? I don't like to think like that though, I hate when my head goes there, it's a depressing thought, probably cause there is no answer.But you're not a failure Invisible, why do you say that? I think you are a good person, and you're not old, actually I don't think you're old enough to be a failure yet. You're just sad, you need to be surrounded by people that are better for your mental health, I think that being home for summer break is probably not good for you? Too much time to think? Maybe you could get a part time job for the summer, something to occupy more of your time, until school starts again. Or work on your art, I bet that can be time consuming, if you take on a larger project, something fun. Or am I totally wrong? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Thanks Smallstar, I think you're a good person too.I'm 19 - only one more year of being a teenager and then I have to be an adult..I'm gonna have to act mature..I'm a failure because no matter what I do it's never good enough. I can't even make myself feel better. I don't want to be me anymore. Noone takes me seriously. I already have a part time job in the most depressing shop in the world but my hours have been cut so I'm only working weekends now.. I dunno which is worse - being at home or in work. I'm trying to work on my art aswel. I do a lot of artwork at night - sleep during the day and stay working at night to avoid people - but I'm lacking motivation and I think i Have artist's block. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smallstar Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Well, who says it's not good enough? I think as long as you try, do what you can, it is good enough. You can only do what you can do. Avoiding people, yeah I like to try and avoid people too, I feel bad about it, but some people just aren't people-people. So I'm probably the wrong person to suggest this, but what if instead of avoiding people you tried to spend time with them? Not the people who hurt you of course, but maybe some art friends? People you can maybe do artwork with. I think we get ourselves into trouble when we spend too much time dwelling on the thoughts that make us sad or scared. And just because you turn 20 doesn't mean you have to be an adult, I'm 26 and I don't feel adult yet, I would like to, but I don't. Really, 20 is young, call it twenty-teen if you want , but nothing has to change just because you're no longer a teenager. Personally, I wish it would, but it looks like you win. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Thanks for replying - You're probably right about changing the user name...It's not a silly idea! I've actually been thinking about this lately! Has anyone any ideas of what I could change it to? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 I like the whole idea of being twenty-teen!My "family" say it's not good enough. I'm never going to be who they want me to be. I wish I could get along with my family. My friend's dad died really suddenly last week and it made me think what if something like that happens to my parents? I know I'd feel lots of regret that we didn't make the most of our time together and I wouldn't be able to handle it. I don't understand - they make me feel miserable most of the time but I still love them. I wonder do they love me in anyway. I feel like there's a hole inside me and nothing will fill it. I spent all weekend with my arty people but nothing makes me feel any better. I tell everyone I'm ok but I'm not and I don't think I ever will be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Hmmm, I think I'm gonna have to think long and hard about this!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 I can't think of anything positive lol! I don't feel like a gift!All my friends call me "Lauralu" so I could use that. Or else "visible" even though I don't feel it most of the time. I also like "Blossom" because it reminds me of that powerpuff girls cartoon I used to watch years ago.. I can't think of anything else.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Ok, no feelings! I do need to think about this more..For some reason I kind of like being called invisible, the name has grown on me!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Ok OK!!! Blossom it is!! Now how do i change it?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blossom Posted June 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 Couldn't have done it without ya!! Thanks for cheering me up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted June 16, 2009 Report Share Posted June 16, 2009 (edited) ............deleted Edited February 4, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystalr0w3 Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Hi Invisible, whether you like it or not, people die. That's the reality that we cannot avoid. All things has an expiration including us. That's the cycle of life. We cannot control that. All we have to do is just accept it. Just use your time wisely. Have the time of your life. Enjoy while you still have it. It's not just you. It's US. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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