Intro

[Guest Megan]

Hello, I just joined. Right now I am feeling overwhelmed and have so much to talk about but it is getting late.

I am 48 years old. I have PTSD and have had major unipolar depression since I was a kid. But my pdoc says I am bipolar now, since sometime last year. I really don't know for sure. I have to understand it for myself.

My PTSD has to do with a death in the family that happened when I was 10, but that was only just a symptom of the real problem. My father is the real problem. I realized recently that interacting with my family especially with my dad, affects my interpersonal communications with others. So I am trying to separate from my dad. I can't take it anymore. Also I feel a lot of danger right now, with my dad and my brother. Every day feels like a new trauma.

I had a really good session with my therapist on Monday only to go home and find out I probably have diabetes. My fasting plasma glucose test was 130. I had to get more tests today. Yesterday after I found out I did some research. My sister called. I told her I probably have diabetes and explained why. She told me the lab was wrong about the healthy range the FPG was supposed to be. I told her I checked NIH and american diabetes association and they said the same thing. She got angry and told me no, they were wrong. She sat there and yelled at me and hung up on me.

I've experienced some rejection online from some people lately and feel really bad.

So as you can see I feel pretty beat up right now. Sorry so long. Thanks for listening.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Mindy, and welcome to our community.

Wowk, you really have been beat up a lot lately. Well, for some of us that is family stuff.

As to what has happened to you online, it is important to understand that it is never personal because people online are anonymous and unknown. Just remind yourself of that. It may feel personal but it is not. I hope you have a much better experience here.

As to your sister, let me assure you that there is a close connection, even a causal connection, between depression and diabetes. Listen to you Medical Doctors and do what they recommend.

I have some questions that I hope you will answer:

1. Why and what type of danger do you feel from your father and brother?

2. Are you living at home with them and, if yes, why haven't you moved into your own place?

3. Do you work?

And, please tell us more about your self that can help us understand you better.

Allan

[Guest Megan]

I have some questions that I hope you will answer:

1. Why and what type of danger do you feel from your father and brother?

2. Are you living at home with them and, if yes, why haven't you moved into your own place?

3. Do you work?

I do not live with my dad and haven't since I was young. My sister lives in another state, one of my brothers lives a couple hundred miles from me, and another brother lives 50 miles from me. My dad lives 30 miles from me.

Edited August 12, 2008 by Megan
typo

[Guest Megan]

Hi Mindy, and welcome to our community.

Hello Allan, I want to thank you for the welcome! Sorry for the lack of manners in starting out! I am very glad to have found this community!

Edited August 8, 2008 by Mindy

[Natalie]

Hi Mindy-

I'd like to say welcome as well. And, I'd really like to hear the rest of your story. We are out here and we are listening. Even if it takes you several days to post because of the need to sort your thoughts and take your time, I encourage you to tell us more.

Sometimes it is very therapeutic just getting it out there.

[Guest Megan]

Hi Mindy-

I'd like to say welcome as well. And, I'd really like to hear the rest of your story. We are out here and we are listening. Even if it takes you several days to post because of the need to sort your thoughts and take your time, I encourage you to tell us more.

Sometimes it is very therapeutic just getting it out there.

Hi Natalie! Thanks so much for the welcome. Perhaps I will look at my journals of late and post parts of it as I feel so emotionally drained after these last two weeks. It's been a constant trauma every day it seems. Thank you for the encouragement.

Edited August 12, 2008 by Megan

[Natalie]

Hi Mindy-

I am wondering as I read your story, if you have been in psychotherapy? I see that you have had a relationship with a psychiatrist- but have you had the opportunity to express your thoughts, feelings to a therapist? Especially for the PTSD....

[Guest Megan]

Hi Natalie, yes I have a therapist that I've been seeing since 1996. She is really good. I've been seeing her a lot these days. I also see a psychologist tomorrow.

Edited August 12, 2008 by Megan