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Well Things are not going so great now


ClownWithafrown
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Well I found out there was a doctor in my state who deals with Pedophilia and treating it with Depo and Therapy. Well I gave him a call and they said that insurance does not cover anything and that just to see him would cost $3600.00. So I called them back and they said that they could go as low as $1600.00 so I called them back this morning and tell them the only price I could afford is $500.00 so their solution was to say "good luck."

They also said I should wait until I feel I am in immediate danger of abusing and then go to a hospital that is an hour away and check into the ER.

So I contacted this evening a mental health hospital and left a message to see if they will see me. The have one doctor who deals with sexual issues.

So right now I am feeling very scared, this stress has got me maturbating quite a bit :)

I just feel so helpless.

what irritates me the most is the first Doctor talks about how people don't go to the doctor because of a fear of self incrimination but I think he aught to also state he charges a crazy amount of money.

That is the problem I have with mental heath doctors is that they are so concerned about the welfair of their patience until the check is late. It seems their caring goes way down when they find out that you are broke. Aparently they only care if you have been arrested or are about to go to court. (hmm... Wonder if it's because if they testify it becomes public record and they can quote themselves and get media attention)

So I am pretty disgruntled

on a side note when my wife was freaking out she told my doctor the full story of my problem (where as I had been dancing around telling him) Well I sent him an email and called his office saying I needed to speak to him as soon as possible but he hasn't returned my calls.

The only way I could ever raise the money would be to tell everyone that I am a pedophile and that I need the money for help. Needless to say I can't because my whole family thinks pedophiles should be put to death.

So when I called the hospital I left a message that I need help now.

Clown

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Hey guys It's me again.

The mental health hospital told me to call the specialist I couldn't afford to see who he recommends...

After leaving 3 messages he called me back he specializes in pedophilia. Got an appointment at the end of July :)

So now I am back on the happy wagon.

Urges are still strong but I am coping and I'm sure I can make it.

The Doctors say that people who haven't offended are afraid to admit, Well the fact it takes so long and so many hoops to jump through it makes it frustrating to try to get help.

The medical services need to improve if there is ever to be hope of people like me (pedophiles) coming forward.

Stephen

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Hi Clown,

Possibly for now, if going to ER isn't what you can do, search pedophylls support groups online, google just that. There are some, and can maybe find peer support and counseling.

Just info, not an opinion.

Lots of compassion for your person, look at behavior.

It's a journey we all have to take, regarding our own ineffective behaviors.

hugs and love

katleen

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So sorry, Clown,

Guess I didn't look far enough, wow, we've lots of judgments about each other, don't we. As humans, I mean. I'll keep looking. You, too. Have been fighting for two yrs for health care for myself. It's not an easy battle.

Am learning that what others think doesn't necessarily apply to me, and like reading a book, you take with you what works. Will look more, let me know if you find any thing acceptable to your needs.

Sincerely

loves and hugs

katleen

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Well I am already in Sexaholics Anonymous but my sponsor said I should not tell people my specific problem because of risk to my own safety and that of my family.

So I am looking for an online group that wants to find ways to avoid acting out.

Did you guys know that according to Perverted Justice their goal is to eradicate pedophiles. Wow Ouch dude been reading a good book

Pedophilia and sexual offending against children by Michael C. Seto

Highly recommend this book half way through and it is amazing.

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Dear Clown,

Have Borderline Personality Disorder, basically untreatable until DBT and CBT.

It is a complex course, broken into steps, that teaches a lot of skills. Primarily impulse control to prevent suicides, but I have found I it helps with PTSD, also. I trigger hard sometimes, and although my brain still goes in it's automatic, well practiced, thought sequences, I can see them now and where they start. What happens, what thought. I have way more life skills than I used to, and think I will get a grip on this, too. Have had to grasp that new thought processes not only help me feel better, but I can see the difference between behaviors and person. Have actually found the place I went numb, in my memory. Am having lots of happy memories, when I thought I had none or few, along with the unpleasant, too. Am finding my fear greater than unremembered pain. Shame is the hardest, but after this class and practicing, finally, took me a few years to try, was unwilling, and then being here and reading other posts, I feel affinity with lots of peoples feelings, and behavior.

And consequences. Am older, have kids, want good for them, esp if they deal with mental illness. Perhaps you could find skills there.

There is an online class that isn't social, just turn in homework. The class is a year long, but teaches the things we missed when young. It could help. You could even ask to be an observer, I think. Or, Marsha Linehan has a book about it. It's about Dialectical Bedhavior Therapy. Google it, if interested. Targets emotion dysregulation, teaches interpersonal skills and distress tolerance. The homeworks are you incorporating skills into your life. It's recommend you practice with simple, non stressful, at least not so, things.

And homework can be about those, too.dbtclass-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

Other than that, I am looking for resources. Am sure others are, too. If you don't hear, keep hollering. And yes, stay safe. You are as valuable as any one. I'm sure.

loves and hugs

katleen

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