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Hmm, erm, yeah well, you now ...


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Why are so many people so coy about thier sexual interests ? ... where does this culture of secrecy come from over our sexual behaviour and who we are attracted to? ... is it out of shame brought about by a morality that few can live up to? or does the secrecy facilitate immoral behaviour by keeping the whole thing under the carpet ?

I've thought that perhaps it's due to an instinct of finding somewhere 'safe' and 'hidden' from predators, to mate, as when we are having sex we are most vulnerable due to loosing awareness of the surroundings and being fixed on each other.

Perhaps all those little rodents that we evolved from that didn't embellish a seed of secrecy in thier sexual acts got eaten! Or is it more cultural ?

Any ideas anyone .. i'd love to know them because i'm getting rally annoyed with all the procrastination over sex in my real life community. Most people can't even refer to sex without using euphemisms, agghh!

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  • 1 year later...

Secrecy and Sex: Some people were raised believing that premartital sex was wrong/ immoral (with opposite gender or same gender). Though they may not still believe that to be true, some part of them does whether or not they realize it.

Some believe physical intimacy between partners isn't supposed to be a public affair. Some are not comfortable with what they want sexually. Some people are too caught up in what other's might think if they know about what happens behind closed doors.

Why all that is? I'm not sure if it dates all the way back to whatever we evolved from, but that's a very interesting theory. :D I've noticed some of the shames and secrets that people carry around with them have nothing to do with culture or raising, but with past experiences in life and conceptions about whomever they're speaking to.

Euphemisms: there are a couple reasons for euphemisms as a general rule. One) sometimes you don't want someone else to overhear and know what you're talking about. Two) you are uncomfortable with yourself, the person you're talking about, the environment in which the conversation is taking place, or the topic itself. Three) some people are unsure what to refer the act of sex itself (or any specific activities therein) and/or are aware that what they might refer to it as might offend whomever their talking to.

Personally, I think if you're doing it you should be able to talk about it with at least one person. If you can't, you probably need to re-evaluate what you're doing and why.


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