getting there Posted August 18, 2010 Report Share Posted August 18, 2010 This happens to me all the time and am struggling to work it out so far with no success and its really getting frustrating...: I hardly fall in love, when I do its with guys about 20 yrs older than me, that don't exchange the same feelings. Though the rare times they do and we start to get intimate, all the romantic and loving feelings fall apart, and leave this obsessive thought: "but does he really like me, or is he pretending to like me in order to have sex?" I feel used, I stop trusting them and reject them since I get too suffocated by these issues. All this in the time span of 1 week! I know that there must be an underlining issue here, but it seems that when I let someone enter my boudaries I regret it even if they don't act in a malicious way, I just change my mind and feel: "this is too close, better go for cover, so leave me alone... Yes I liked you until 5 minutes ago, not anymore, please leave". I've thought them all: attachment issues, too much isolation, or whaterver else. Though even if I eventually figure it out, how can I change such cognitive comprehension into changing the way I feel in this experience? I can't just tell myself: "ok, I feel this because of that..., ok, but nothing changes". Its really difficult and sometimes I think all my effort to work this out is not getting anywhere.... really need to change...Any suggestions? :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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