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Only happy and perfect acceptable


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I am in an 11-year relationship, I have two kids from a previous marriage, he has two kids from a previous relationship. We all live together now, we have two very different styles of parenting, I'm a rewards and consequence kind of girl, he doesn't want to have to "deal" with them, they can do whatever they like as long as he doesn't have to be involved. It has created an incredible amount of stress in the household. He is mad at me if I do anything that makes his kids unhappy, my kids are mad because they feel it is a double standard, his kids are not into doing good things, drugs, running away, stealing from my kids, lies, skipping school, etc.. He is also mad because I should have everything handled on my own without any imput or support from him. He doesn't care how it is handled, just make everyone feel happy and get along so when he comes home everything is blissful. He spends about 4-5 nights at the bar because he can't deal with it. My problem is, I have been unsuccessful in acheiving this, and when I try to discuss ANYTHING with him, he cuts me off and complains about not wanting to hear it. Unfortunately, I don't take no that easily and keep trying to talk to him until it gets to the point I am in tears from hurt and anger and he just leaves or shuts all the way down. How do I fix this?:confused::(

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