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Posted

I have had a rough few years. My job requires me to be gone a lot. I have been married for several years and have a great a great family. The past few year have been especially tough. I lost my mother and father within three months of each other. I spent the time while I was not away on the job in helping them (parents) until they died. My wife & kids never saw me due to the work of taking care of parents and work during the week. She helped as if it were her own parents (she was close to them too). Within months of my parent funeral I was on the road again for a long time due to a high stress job with lots of responsibility. My wife and I are at odds. I think we have been on "go" mode so much that we have not acknowledged our difficulties through this mess and trying to manage all of he external things to our marriage (parents death, job, kids, life). We are working through it, but it is hard to be away for 5 months at a time due to the job. We both want to fix things, but I am a bit of a type "A" sprinkled with some nervous disorder and some OCD (little not a lot). She brought up that I am calling too much..and I am. I am afraid that i will loose her, and she and the kids are all I have. Reality is I think we are fine, but my own fear is eating me and I cannot dump it on her...not good for anyone. I think I have more issues than her. I want to make us better, but I cannot control it like good Type A would like and it is eating me. Unfortunately, I really do not have any friends for an outlet due to my responsibility in my job. Just holding it together day by day and going crazy doing it.:confused:

Posted

The other side of the coin.....

I am a wife that stays home and husband is only home 1 day a week. We too have relationship issues but never seem to deal with them. I am not a big nagger... and I hate to just nag when he is home.. He sleeps a lot when he is home.

I hate his job and wish he would move back home. When he calls too much I know he knows he has messed up and is afraid I am going to find someone else. I have been married to him around 20 yrs.. so I do not plan on going anywhere... However if I do not answer the phone or texted him back he gets all nervous... sometimes I am just busy ... or outside with the dogs. or in a store or something.

I miss him sooo much sometimes... but then again at other times I can't wait for him to leave. This has caused me a lot of stress and I believe it adds to my Mental Illness.

Call her maybe one time a nght or something?? Or is that too much for her? Try not to question every minute of her day.. talk about you... talk about how you feel ... how the kids are doing... tell her you love her....

Gabby

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