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Need some advice


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My husband who is now sixty, seems to have retired early in the sexual

way, I know he still wants to be active as he looks at a website occasionally with nude womens pictures. Not sure what he is doing but my guess is satisfying his urges.

This makes me feel very angry, hurt and low self-esteem and I have tried telling him this but he just carries on.

I would like some views on whether I am over re-acting or is what he is doing not "normal" ( for lack of a better word).

Thanks for anyones mature, unbiased opinion.


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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Debysmomma,

Its very likely that your husband thinks he can't satisfy you any longer. Perhaps erectile problems? He may look at pics on the internet but its possible that he is not satisfying himself.

Men also go through menopause. Its slow and takes longer and happens at different rates for differen men but, its possible that his testosterone levels have dropped a lot compared to other men his age, or that his libido is not what it was. I am guessing but, at his age, feeling anxious about sex and performance is very common but very burdensome. Low testosterone, enlarged prostate gland, inability to ejaculate and orgasm, etc, etc...and other potential problems

Again, I can only guess at what is wrong but have you tried to talk to him, asking him what is going on? He may or may not be able to answer. A visit to his MD is certainly a good idea.

What do you think?


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  • 3 weeks later...

Thanks for you feedback Allan, it was reassuring to hear a logical reason for what he is doing and feeling. I just never looked at it that clearly. I guess because we have a background of some marital problems that were solved but have left me with some emotional scars doesn't help. I appreciate your reply.

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