Depression remission

[xenophon]

After my father and my wife died within one year, I became quite depressed and anxious. These states of mind were pretty disabling.

Eventually, I got through it, and I feel fine now. I did not see a therapist.

Is this within a normal range? That is, typical?

Would going to a therapist have accomplished very much?

[Guest ASchwartz]

You suffered two major losses within one year and that is enough to make anyone feel awful. It is argued, and I think correctly, that the depression associated with death and gried is not clinical depression but is a normal part of working through the grief process. In addition, there are those who believe that grief counseling is unnecessary because it is normal to feel depressed after a major loss. The fact is that you are feeling better now and that is what is most important.

Allan

[xenophon]

Allan,

Thank you for the response.

Death is a natural and inescapable event.

After considering the matter, there would be little that a therapist could offer. There are no words.

So, it would have been illogical for me to see a therapist at that time.

[Mark]

It might have helped to see a therapist, but no therapist can work miracles, and feeling better after such substantial loss before you've had a good long chance to work through would be a miracle. Even though a therapist can't remove grief, it can still help to be able to talk about it - a therapist can help with that (as can friends and family if they are receptive). Some people derive more comfort from that than others.

I guess I'm reacting to the word illogical. I don't see it as illogical to see a therapist, because the process is an emotional one, not a logical one. There isn't much logic to grief. Whatever helps is a good thing (provided it is not self-destructive as in the case of drugs/alcohol/mcdonalds)

[xenophon]

Mark, it would, of course, be rather unusual not to feel awful.

FYI, I did talk to my rector. He is a very wise man. That did help a lot.

Illogical may have been an inaccurate word to use.

At that time, I had no family, as I am the last one amoung the living.

You are right about miracles. There are none available that I can see.

Adjustment is a good word for me to use in this matter.

By implication, I posed a question: does depression usually have a real life antecedent? And,does knowledge of that serve as a basis for remission?

I am trying to gain some insight into this thing called depression.

[crowyhead]

By implication, I posed a question: does depression usually have a real life antecedent? And,does knowledge of that serve as a basis for remission?

I am trying to gain some insight into this thing called depression.

Hi xenophon,

Hopefully Mark doesn't mind me stepping into the conversation.

To answer your question -- sort of -- I'll offer my own experiences. I've had several episodes of major depression over the past ten years, and I'm currently on maintainence medication (a combination of Wellbutrin for depression and Klonopin for generalized anxiety disorder, if you were curious). I'm also going through some therapy at the moment due to having a relapse of sorts last year.

Of the episodes of depression I've experienced, there was at least one that was very clearly triggered by an incident in my life; a friend of mine committed murder/suicide, killing himself and his ex-girlfriend. I suffered what I would term normal shock and grief at first, but as the people around me recovered, I slipped deeper into depression and suicidal ideation, and it eventually took counseling and an adjustment in my medication to bring me out of it. At that point, knowing that it was all of my grief and conflicting feelings over the murder/suicide that had triggered my depression did not really help me, because the problem had grown to be much larger.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that it's been my experience that while episodes of clinical depression can be triggered by life events, it's just as common for them to come seemingly out of the blue, and even knowing what has triggered the depression doesn't always help -- at least, not by the time it has progressed from normal grieving into something pathological. Does that make sense?

[xenophon]

crowyhead --

Yes, it does make sense.

I got back to normal after I moved away and got married again.