Clover1 Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 Nearly two weeks as a single parent and my confidence is shot to bits. I waiver between anger, sadness, could not care less and a part of me that thinks its all a big mistake. I dont know how I could be taken in so much by someone I trusted with my life. Is it really bad to want revenge as I'm very tempted to let his employer know he was messing about with one of the staff and they are all in responsible positions and should be acting as role models!!:mad::confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waiting Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 Hi Clover,I am sorry you feel so upset.I am not sure all the details, but I will urge caution. Maybe you could explain better what is going on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clover1 Posted April 22, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Hello waiting,I am the newly separated after 18 years marriage girl. Kids are still teens, mortgage and bills to pay and married to someone who I feel conned me. Marriage is for life and when I made my vows I meant every word of them. He my ex feels as though the feelings were NEVER there for him so I guess I was wearing rose coloured glasses for many a year. He has left now to find inspiration in his life and feels that there is someone special out there for him.Anyway this is what I have replied to my revenge thread:THANK YOU EVERYONE.I am not normally a vengeful type person (although it seemed good at the time) and really dont know what I was thinking. I have never in all my life wanted to make someone sad and after getting so many replies it confirms what is already true in my heart. I know I need to let go and gather myself together and be the best that I can. Something like revenge is for his type of character and I will not stoop that low. xxxxx Thank you for replying x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ASchwartz Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Hi Clover,You are being very self critical and guilty for thinking about revenge, at least it seems that way to me. However, the problem about vengeful thinking is that it hurts oneself. Its easy to be consumed by hateful feelings, it hurts the "self." Now, its important to move on so you do not allow your ex, even in your thinking, to do anymore harm to your life. You have a right to be happy.Allan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waiting Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Hi Clover,I have been separated for three years after being married for 16 years. I have two teen aged kids as well. I have been unemployed for two years and still receive no child support and my wife still resides in the matrimonial home. My wifes seemingly never really trusted me and refused to go for marriage counseling or do anything to makes things work. She is now bitter that I left her and refuses to cooperate at all.I have burned a lot of my savings and just seems I am losing everything.I understand your pain. It is not fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clover1 Posted April 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 23, 2011 It is so so difficult to move on. I have separated and sorted my bills, scrubbed the house, am decorating the living room and work full time and looking after my three children. I am trying my best to move on and be happy, it just feels so odd and as if I am living in a dream at the moment. I'm sick of feeling all of the time and my self esteem and self worth have taken a serious bashing. I dont know how to move on and feel so sad. Does anyone have any advice on that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waiting Posted April 25, 2011 Report Share Posted April 25, 2011 Hi Clover,After my girlfriend left me I felt crushed and I still do. I feel I have lost everything. I feel that I will never regain anything. I am not sure how to move on either. I think there is no magic other than time.We survive and do our best to enjoy what we can for now. In time the pain will diminish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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