I have few friends and I feel like an outcast

[jk1964]

I have a small penis maybe 3 inches. I am still a virgin as my only sexual encounter was a disaster. I wasn't her first and she took pleasure in ridiculing me. Maintaining friendships after this became awkward,

I knew I can never be more then a friend to a female and as I got older being just a friend became difficult being sexually frustrated and having feelings for them I can never act on

With males it was worse I felt pressured to get a girl friend I always felt other males would never accept me as an equal until I do.

I kept to myself talking only when forced to, I didn't see any other choice if I don't have friends then no one will find out I am defective. This went on for years until I moved to another state and one day I met a gay female who didn't like me being alone all the time.

Over time I opened up to her and we became very close. She knows what is wrong with me but she doesn't quite understand why a small penis is a problem. I just want her to understand how things are for males with a small penis is

[feelingbetter]

Hey guy, I am sorry to hear you're having it so tough. There's a guy in England with 3 inches and he made a documentary called My Penis and Everyone Elses. There are parts of it that are poorly done and do not serve to help--I don't know why he included them. But, it does show that he found a loving wife and has a kid. His dad was also small and also had a loving wife for years. So, it is possible to find a girl who will love you for you and because of that she will love your penis also. No, you'll never be a porn star, most of us won't. The most dangerous thing you can do is obsess about it to the point that the actual OBSESSION is the thing that sabotages your relationships and not the actual penis. This is very, very difficult to avoid due to the inappropriate emphasis our current society places on penis size (there are many complex reasons for this emphasis--most of which have absolutely nothing to do with being a good lover--just ask your friend, if two women can sexually please each other, any amount of penis added to that can only add to it). Sadly, your first encounter was with a girl who was heartless enough to actually make a big deal out of it. That can devastate you for life and you sincerely may need to seek out a good counselor as online "counseling" can only go so far.

At 3 inches, you will more than likely have more trouble finding a girl for a long term relationship again due to the societal tone we have allowed to be created. However, I firmly believe when you do find her (assuming you desire a long term relationship), she will be a much more awesome partner than most other guys get--you'll know she loves you for you and she doesn't have these stupid societal hangups a lot of girls seem to have. My wife states she has never understood this obsession with penis size--she is like your friend. She has been an awesome partner for 19 years now. She adores sex and says she has never desired anything larger than me. A true female, the kind you want, will want sex with YOU because it is YOU and she loves YOU, your penis is a part of the intimacy but it is not the point of the whole thing. A woman who makes it a point of the whole thing does not appreciate you for you and she will be a partner you could never satisfy no matter your penis size because her mentality is incorrect--it just may take a while before her dissatisfaction becomes apparent but it surely will--maybe not bedroom stuff but likely even more disastrous in nature and doubtful the relationship will go the distance.

There are plenty of guys on these sites that are severely depressed and cannot see anything but what they perceive as their own inadequacy--please don't allow them to drag you down with them. Listen to your friend, she sounds like she's got her head on right.

No, this won't be easy. Relationships with women never are, but especially if you are having to battle against an inappropriate societal stereotype. It is easy to think, if I had a big penis, all these problems will be solved. I can absolutely guarantee you that although bigger guys may develop more confidence and seem to have an easier time getting women into bed, in the long run they have no better luck (and actually from my friends lives they often have a harder time) in developing a long term meaningful relationship--because penis size has absolutely NO relation to the factors that play into the development of a fulfilling relationship. Loving each other, each of you sacrificing for the good of the other, compromising, building each other up, playing off each other's strengths and shoring up each others weaknesses, working on a soul connection, and yes, opening yourselves up to freely explore and enjoy sexually pleasuring each other with whatever attributes you each have--not sitting there thinking I wish he was bigger, I wish she was tighter, bigger boobs, smaller butt, etc etc. Once you are comfortable with each other and secure in the bond you have, you can even introduce toy play--knowing its just play and NOT a replacement for you.

I made the mistake of bringing in toys due to a sick desire to prove that she would go crazy with a big toy, showing that I was truly inadequate. I feel so bad for doing this to her--I was so wrong. She finally got fed up with my antics and we had a fight. She finally said "I was just going along with it because I thought it was something that got YOU off. Give me the real thing over a toy any day of the week!" So, I quit bringing out the toys and she has not once asked me to take them out. Now, you may end up with someone who enjoys toy play. Know that it is ok if done with a healthy attitude, that you don't feel threatened by their presence and that they are just play--not a substitute for you. If she truly cares for YOU, she will want to feel YOU rubbing against and inside her, not some rubber thing.

Ok, I got carried away and this is just some of what I think on this. Please let me know your views as I don't intend to pretend I have some magical insight or easy answer to this.

Thanks,

FB