Irritability

[dorothy]

I realize that being irritable is low on the list of negatives, but sometimes I feel like it's the hardest day to day thing for the people around me to deal with. I haven't left my house unless absolutely necessary for the past week because I am so irritated with everyone, and I don't just mean the people I know. My irritability extends to the cashier at the grocery store and the unhelpful woman in the library. Also to the Domino's Pizza website.

But I know it's hardest on my significant other, because he has to LIVE with me. It's just like I can't do anything well or fast enough, and all of it makes me so irritable and angry. Instead of getting anything accomplished I'm just wallowing around the house trying to calm myself down over NOTHING.

How do you explain being so angry and irritable for no reason? I was always really good at keeping things to myself, but lately I'm so at an end that I feel like I might just burst. When I've left the house out of necessity I've ended up making an ass of myself by doing things like, refusing to get into a half full elevator because the amount of people in the elevator frustrates me, and makes me feel a little claustrophobic!

Do you guys have any advice on how to deal with explaining to someone that you're just angry, and probably they should leave you alone? And it's not them? It feels like dejavu, and slowly I can see people getting offended because I don't answer my phone, leave conversations awkwardly, etc. What is the best way to deal with people when you KNOW you just need to be alone, without offending them? I mean, when you're unable to plaster on a smile, is the only answer just to isolate yourself?

I feel like this isn't limited to bipolar disorder-ites, since I'm sure everyone finds themselves in a situation like this from time to time, and I'm hoping maybe someone has the magic answer to this problem.

[lostINoblivion]

I find myself frustrated a lot, especially around loved ones. I just have to say to them that I'm not angry with them and that it is best, when I act like that, to just give me my space. A lot of times I just have to separate myself until I can calm down. There are also many times when I have to bite my tongue so I don't offend someone. It is always a difficult situation to be in and I sympathize with you. I don't think there is a whole lot you can do, unfortunately. Just try and let others know how you are feeling and that is not them.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Dorothy and Lost,

Irritability is a symptom of something going on. For example, it is sometimes a symptom of depression and it can be a symptom of a manic episode. It is not that anything is wrong with feeling irritable. We can all feel it from time to time. Rather, it is the fact that it lasts a long time, as you seem to be experiencing, Dorothy, that makes it a problem. Assuming you are on medications, it could be a medication issue or it could be an issue of feeling frustrated with someone in your life: kind of like Lost is describing with her family.

Dorothy, do you take medication for Bipolar and are you in psychotherapy?

Allan

[John Rutledge]

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Edited October 28, 2009 by John Rutledge

[dorothy]

I am not currently medicated nor in therapy. I have had bad experiences with various medications and therapy, and eventually concluded I might be better off without them (which is a ridiculous thing to say if I DO suffer from manic depression), but I am making feeble attempts to feel less bitter about the entire psychiatric process, part of which includes coming here.

I think it really hits the nail on the head to say it is the prolonged irritability that is driving me, and the one closest to me, crazy, and honestly I'm not sure if I can tell the difference between a genuine reason to feel that way. I'll think I have every right to feel one way towards a person, but am continually told it is "in my head", which isn't very helpful (which may actually be a valid reason in of itself to be irritable). It's so confusing.

Thank you for the replies, and I have to admit, in my safety through anonymity, that I'm a little afraid the answer is that without medical help I can't expect to feel better.

So I think through this silly post about me being so irritable I may have convinced myself, for the moment, that I should try to see someone again... because honestly I want to know if I was misdiagnosed or not. The question hanging over my head everyday (and these posts) is the back and forth, do I have a problem that can be helped or not? And if not, where does that leave me?

Thanks everyone for the understanding.