So here I am.
Running(figuratively)naked down the street. Hanging it all out.
Today I decided to move from where I live. I want some space, some living by myself. I spent the last of my money on sleeping bag, tent, etc., anticipating homelessness. I did register for shelter today, we'll see what happens. Could be an interesting week. Am a 53 year old woman missing front teeth. Am seriously having M.H. issues, and physical ones, too. Broke and about to be homeless. Smart... Oh, yes, I got a cheap phone, shampoo samples and a three dollar summer shirt. The person I live with is super stressed by my illness, and I him, with his blaming me and not believing what I see, and being angry when I question his opinion, or say can we do this not mad. I leave over and over, I trigger, he asks me stay, but am not really able to be in a relationship. Since I've been suicidal, I figure he won't ask me to leave. Has said it would be okay if I have somewhere to go. Yeah. Well, am out of options, so, am flinging myself to the universe, so to speak. Always thought bag ladies were cool, feeding pigeons. I like pigeons. Was a runaway in downtown Portland, alone. Only one night, but only remember part. Maybe I have things to face. I don't know.
And I don't know why I blabbed all this other than I don't want to be thought of as a know it all. And don't want anyone to think I ihink I have your answers. Just want you to know I'm a bit different, too. In spite of everything, am going to live fully the rest of my life, being outside of what I am in, as much as possible. And hopefully not too afraid. M.H. is in line with slavery and alternate life styles for equal rights and protection from stigma. Remember when cancer patients were blamed for their illness?
Anyway, enough for today. It's been a very long one and have been up awhile. Early.
loves and hugs