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Life is full of pain...


Aaron.X.C

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On my blog so don't tell me any crap about throwing a temper tantrum, and you know who im talking about. If you have nothing nice to say don't say it, if I wanted comments of all kinds I would have posted it in the forum, not in my PERSONAL Blog.

Literally life is full of pain, No-Name is finding new ways to hurt me if i disobey him, whether it be my heart beats ultrafast for a couple seconds(or just hurts) or my neck vein feels like it went boom, or a huge pain in my head. New news about my hip, the cartilage stuff between my bones is gone, never had any to begin with. Just want to end it all, but I know I can't I just can't but the next time I see a gun, i don't know if theirs going to be a hole in my head.

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I know deep breathing is difficult for you, but maybe it would happen over time if you worked on it little by little? Another way to shift your brain is to look at something in nature and just observe everything about it and try to be fully present in the moment happening right now in nature, giving less and less attention to the thoughts circling in your head.

I'm so sorry you hurt :(

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Thanks for the suggestion sedsed, 'cept the problem is, I graduate when im 19

and California won't allow dropouts

listening to it, Sadly I can't find a peace in it i feel myself impatient wanting to hate or an angry song, this annoys my mind. This slows down my heart by alot (off-topic i know)

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Not off topic, you are talking about your struggles to find calm. A body in constant tension is going to be in pain, and you have other injuries that cause pain on top of your tension. Can you keep searching, Aaron, for something that relaxes you? Maybe you feel you cannot afford to let down your guard?:o

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My parents go to sleep early and use to wake up late, which they don't do anymore, I enjoy my privacy despite its worse than daytime. Though in daytime I have to deal with idiots.

Being awake at night-time is like a blessing and curse, mind goes crazy and yet it feels satisfied? Btw 4:00 AM where I live at

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Not really, have some trouble sleeping, it flooded in the city where i live at, thank god i live on the outskirts rainign all damn day for the entired weekend, its nevver, i mean NEVER flooded in freakin Imperial

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Feeling depressed, not sure what to do... just feeling down and lonely... Seeing other people advance seeing other people happy, just makes me so mad... so f'cking angry... feeling abandoned, like i was left to rot. I don't know... nothing works anymore...

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One can always run faster than a zombie. :-)

You could throw gasoline on it and light it.

You could run it over with your car.

If you're suicidal, you can stand still and let it eat your brain!

Lots of possibilities. You just have to think outside the pine box. :-)

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Aaron I'm sorry you are hurting so much today:( yer friends here only want to cheer you up. I wish I could cheer you up too... and get you a job so you could move out :(

Are there any students you can make friends with this year?

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